So This is Not Earth?
by danners3
Summary: The stargate activates on Atlantis and a surprise visitor from earth arrives through... but she did not come through the SGC. John and the rest of the team are drawn into the mystery that surrounds her arrival...
1. Chapter 1 Getting off on the wrong floor

CHAPTER 1 – GETTING OFF ON THE WRONG FLOOR

"Unscheduled offworld activation!" The warning claxons sounded in Atlantis and Sam sighed. She was in the control room going over some figures with Rodney and glanced over at the gate technician as he made the announcement. These such occurrences, while not uncommon, did cause a stir in Atlantis. Without an IDC or personal identification code, it was simply not prudent to open the doors of Atlantis, so to speak, and as commander of the base? Opening the doors was certainly Colonel Samantha Carter's call.

"Ok Seargant... what have we got?"

"No IDC ma'am..." He looked at her hopefully, waiting on instructions as to whether to lower the shield and allow the unknown person or persons in... or simply leave it shut and let the poor smuck coming through the gate, simply disappear into a million rather painful pieces as he disintegrated on contact with the event horizon. Her call, thank goodness.

"How many teams are offworld at the moment, Seargent?" Sam moved over to the window so that she could look down into the gate room, once again marvelling at that perfect piece of technology that effectively harnessed a wormhole, allowing space to fold and one to step through the ring and the wormhole and come out the other side... somewhere else. Far, far away. She had been one of those responsible, all those years ago – to study the device and attempt to get it working. It had been discovered in Egypt in the 1930's and a team of scientists had given their hearts and their lives to allow credence to a piece of technology that was simply light years away from anything found and created by man on earth.

Created by man, being the operative expression. This device was simply part of a network of such devices, created through the milky way galaxy as a means of transportation, by an alien race known simply as the Ancient's. And now? Colonel Samantha Carter and her team of earth personnel were the inhabitants of the city of Atlantis, finally rediscovered in the Pegasus galaxy, home to the Ancients more than 10,000 years ago.

The seargent's answer brought her back from her reverie. "We have two teams offworld Colonel, but none due to report in. Shall I lower the shield?"

She thought quickly and made the decision. "Lower the shield." She then called down urgently to the marines who guarded the stargate.

"We've got company people, weapons set to stun." She spared a brief second to make sure they complied, moving in a protective semi circle around the gate and activiting her ear comm she asked Colonel Sheppard to get down to the gate room immediately.

"Seems we have unscheduled company John. Let's see whose coming to call..."

She flicked a glance around the control room, then headed down the stairs that would take her to the gate room. Tall and confident, with short blonde hair and sparkling blue eyes, she commanded the base with a fair hand, having had ten years experience with SG1 team, back on earth. Her own offworld missions were too numerous to count, and she had agreed to come here to the Pegasus galaxy as a means to push herself and abilities a little more. She had accomplished on earth, all that she could.

Colonel John Sheppard came running into the gate room. Dark unruly hair, hazel eyes, ruggedly handsome face and good friend to Sam. Her second in command really – although John was the military commander and made all such decisions. She herself, was more base administrator and he left those decisions to her. Gladly.

He stepped up beside the marines, ready to welcome the guest or guests who stepped through the gate, his trusty P90 already up and pointed – the perfect welcoming companion should things go south. Sam noted that Ronon and Teyla, members of John's team, had fallen in behind him and Ronon had his energy weapon at the ready.

They were not ready for what stepped through that gate. A small built woman, long dark hair that curled riotiously around her face and about her shoulders, clad in worn denims, sneakers and a simple tank top with a camera, no – make that several cameras – slung around her neck.

And chocolate brown eyes that one could get lost in...

The click of weapons had her widening her eyes immediately. She leaned over slightly to get her breath and John could see that her face had paled and he wondered if she was a first time gate traveller. It was something that one needed to become accustomed to and that first time was worse than being on the world's fastest roller coaster that had suddenly spun out of control. You simply arrived at the other side with no comprehension as to what had just happened and feeling as though some of your body parts had chosen not to arrive intact. Definitely an experience that had to grow on you.

He motioned briefly for the marines to stand down and after a small pause, they lowered their weapons. He kept his own at more or less half mast, waiting to see what she would do. When she brought herself up to full height, which admittedly was not much, he saw the sudden fear in her eyes as she saw the weapons pointing at her, and began to turn slightly and back away, towards him and away from the soldiers.

Sam spoke, seeing the fear on her face. "I am Colonel Carter. Where have you come from? And what is your purpose here?" Frown lines appeared on Sam's face. She took in the woman's attire and the cameras around her neck and knew immediately that she was from earth.

The woman did not speak, just continued backing up slowly, and when she had put some distance between herself and the soldiers, she turned abruptly as though to run, and ran smack into the hard wall of muscle that was Colonel John Sheppard.

He banded a hand around her to steady her as much as restrain her and looked down into her face with just a little amusement. Amusement that she did not share. Feeling his arm restrain her, she panicked and began to kick and claw, causing more than one colourful oath to come out of his mouth.

"Damn it woman! Hold still, I'm not going to hurt you!"

"Let me go. You're undermining my first amendment rights. Last I checked, this is a free country!"

She squirmed and wriggled against him, causing him to huff a breath of annoyance and band his arm a little tighter.

"Lady? Just what country do you think you're in? "Cause I'm telling you... the laws out here are a little different..."

She kicked him hard in the shins, then went to knee him in the groin in response, and he felt his grip on her slip just a little. "Jesus! Come back here!" He reached for her, but she was fast and around him in seconds, heading for the door. Ronon was fast to react, the big Satedan simply brought up his energy weapon and fired it, catching her squarely in the centre of the back and brought her down immediately.

Sam turned an annoyed glance on Ronon and John exploded with another oath. "Damn it Ronon! Did you have to hit her with that? She's gonna be more than just a little pissed when she wakes up..."

"If you'd done your job Sheppard, I wouldn't have had to fire the damn weapon. You couldn't hold on to a tiny thing like that?"

"Tiny she might be, but her feet and knees were about to do some serious damage. Damn... Sam? Can you contact the SGC and find out just who the hell she is? I'll get her to the infirmary and take a bit of flack from Carson as to why I allowed a civilian to get shot by an energy weapon. You, Ronon! Can write the damn report on this one..."

He huffed a breath and bent down to where she lay on the floor. Pushing the long curling hair out of her face he acknowledged that she was quite stunning. Even with those melt in your mouth chocolate eyes shut, her warm toned skin and high cheekbones made an exceptionally beautiful face, not classically so – but in that 'hot get under your collar' sort of way. He placed his arms underneath and swung her easily into his arms. There wasn't much of her. The cameras that had been around her neck had been removed and taken away by one of the marines at Sam's instruction – hoping to see what was on them for a clue as to where she had been.

He carried her through to the infirmary and faced Carson's inevitable wrath as to why he was bringing in a woman who had been shot by one of their energy weapons. The scottish doctor had a way of making him feel like a small naughty child, and he had to resist the urge to hang his head slightly at the tirade.

"Aaah, Doc. She was trying to escape. At least, that's what it looked like. And we couldn't have her running all over the base until we know where she has come from and what she's doing here. Sam's on the blower to the SGC now, to find out who she is. Usually we get a heads up before any visitors are sent through, so must have missed the memo on this one...She had cameras around her neck, and it seems a little bit unusual... hell, a whole lot unusual – that earth would sent through a journalist or a photographer – whatever the hell she turns out to be."

"Regardless Colonel – not really a very good way to treat visitors. Shoot them first and ask questions later. I have to doubt the practicality of that mandate."

"Yeah, sorry Doc... bad call I guess. How bad is she hit? She took the blow right in the back just as she was running. Hell, she went down pretty hard."

"She'll be out for a while Colonel. And she'll have an almighty sore head as well as back, given the size of her. I suppose I should be grateful that Ronon had his weapon set to stun... hmmm?" Doctor Carson Beckett looked up a John, who felt like crawling under the bed. Of course the doctor had known that Ronon had pulled the trigger. John had deliberately not divulged who had shot her, but it was obvious to the doctor that Ronon's blood ran a little hotter than everyone else's here in Atlantis, and as he was rarely without that big energy weapon of his? Well, this misdemeanour was a little harder for John to try and cover.

"I'll go and see if Sam has had any luck in finding out who she is. Do me a favour Doc, and call me when she wakes up. I imagine I'll have a bit of grovelling to do when the mother of headaches strikes her. Damn..." He cast a lingering look at the small form that lay in the bed, cheeks now pale and long dark hair spread out over the pillow. He resisted the urge to reach out and move the long strand that had covered part of her cheek, but thrusting his hands roughly into his pockets, he huffed a breath and turned to leave, but not before he heard Carson's parting remark.

"Perhaps I should give her time to calm down before I call you?" His scottish lilt held dry amusement and he saw the Colonel pause in the doorway and saw his shoulders sag slightly. Carson resisted the urge to laugh out loud. The Colonel was like an overgrown boy sometimes. Humour always below the surface, just covering that hard military edge that honed his everyday actions. A good man, a good leader and respected throughout Atlantis and a growing reputation as more than just a little bit of a bad ass in the Pegasus galaxy. Carson gave him a bit of grief from time to time, but knew that Colonel John Sheppard wouldn't have willingly fired on a civilian,nor would he have sanctioned any of his team to do so either.

"Might be a good idea Doc... but I'd prefer to take the heat. As soon as she wakes up, ok?"

"Copy that Colonel."

John went back to the control room to find Sam still communicating with the SGC back on earth. She raised an eyebrow at John when he walked in and he pulled up a chair, eager to find out what she had learnt. Shutting down communications, she waved her hands in consternation.

"Nada, John. They know nothing. She didn't come through the SGC, and as that is the only working gate on earth... seems we have a little mystery on her hands. I've had one of the technicians begin pulling up some of the photos that were on her camera. Looks fairly innocuous – likely earth, mainly shots of water, islands – excellent photos from a technical point of view, but I don't recognise the landscape other than I'm pretty sure that they were filmed on earth. So just how the hell did she get here? Did Carson tell you how long she'd be out for?"

"He'll let me know when she wakes up... and I'll be dodging the bullet for the mother of all headaches she's gonna have. Not looking forward to that. So... did not come through the SGC... wow, that's a kicker. I look forward to hearing the explanation for that one!"

He got up to leave, needing to complete his offworld planning for the next week as he had been about to do before Sam had called him down to the gate room.

"I'll let you know after I've had a chance to talk to her. Probably best she's not bombarded at once – I'll get the story and then we'll try and piece together what happened."

Sam smiled as he left thinking that the chocolate brown eyes would not have swayed his decision to be the one to question her... no, not at all...


	2. Chapter 2 Not through the gate

CHAPTER 2 – NOT THROUGH THE GATE

He got the call around two hours later from Carson, and sitting at his desk hunched over his laptop, he rested his eyes and huffed a breath. Not looking forward to this particular meeting, he stood up and stretched, before flipping his laptop closed. Time to go down and face the music.

And she was in full song. Attempting to push herself out of the bed while Carson placed strong hands on her shoulders to try and restrain her, her face had flushed a becoming pink and her hair in tangled disarray around her face had John pausing at the door and pushing down the spark of laughter that wanted to get out. The fury in those chocolate brown eyes had him quickly rethinking the laughter, and schooling his features into somewhat suitable seriousness, he approached the bed.

"Thank god Colonel! She may be a tiny wee thing, but she's stronger than she looks. And I've got all the bruising I can take, thank you very much!" An extremely irrate Dr Beckett removed his hands from the woman's shoulders and backed away, deciding that Colonel Sheppard had gotten them into this situation, then he could damn well pay the price.

"Yeah, got that Carson. My own bruises..." and he thought of the large bruise already making itself known on his shin, where she had kicked him in her initial fury in the gate room. A fiesty little thing by all accounts.

She had managed to slide out of bed, and feeling dizzy from the effects of the energy blast, her legs buckled slightly and she reached out to grab the side of the bed, taking a handful of blanket instead and crashing unceremoniously to the floor. Her yelp of pain had John moving a little faster than he had intended, and he dropped down quickly beside her and softened his voice to try and calm her down.

"Hey... let me help you. I'm sorry about your head..." Her head whipped around at his words and she pushed at his chest to try and keep him away, but he wanted to get her upright and back into the bed, so he ignored the hands she placed there and simply drew her upright, keeping her pulled against his body for balance.

Those brown eyes looked up angrily into his, and he felt more than just a small spark of remorse at the pain that instantly clouded over that warm chocolate, and one hand left his chest and pressed against her eyes as though to combat the pain. Carson saw the action and murmured that he would get her some pain relief.

Her voice was not as firm as it could have been, and it shook slightly. "What the hell did I get hit with? It felt like a tank drove into me, over me and left me as roadkill... damn..."

A bark of laughter rose unbidden and he couldn't push that one down, watching as her hand was removed from her eyes and she looked up at him with just a tiny bit less hostility, and a little more curiousity.

"Aah...one of our weapons... and again, I apologise. Ronon got a little carried away, thought you were some sort of security risk. Actually, don't know that you aren't yet? Where are you from?"

She answered a question with a question, and he thought immediately – 'journalist', and frowned.

"Where am I? Some sort of secret military base? Last thing I knew I was in the Bermuda Triangle – doing a photo essay for Time Life magazine. I'd chartered a boat, taken some great shots, then bam... felt like something slammed into me. Then I stepped through that .. . ring?... then another dropkick. Here I am. Feeling like several linebackers took their best shots at me... not being one to complain or anything, but don't I have rights?"

She hadn't moved from the protective circle of his arms, and he took the opportunity to release his hold and aim her back toward the bed.

"I'll answer what I can, but without security clearance, I can't tell you a hell of a lot. Awkward really... seeing as how we don't know how you arrived here...Here comes Carson with some pain relief for you, take that edge of that headache. Can I get you anything – food? Coffee?"

A glimmer of hope came into those brown eyes and her voice warmed several degrees as she answered a little hopefully. "Ah, coffee? If you're not going to poison me or anything... so who do I need to speak to about getting the hell out of here and back to where I … was?"

He had managed to manoever her back to the bed and simply reached down and plucked her off the floor and back onto the bed, looking down at the surprise in her eyes.

"Do you manhandle all your guests in this establishment? Serious abuse of first amendment rights..."

"Guests? Rather a loose analogy. You're not exactly invited... and first amendment rights lady? Don't apply out here." John took a step back from the bed as Carson approached with an injection. She waved it away, a spark of fear in her eyes.

"Please, don't stick me with that thing. I hate needles... ugh!"

"It'll take the edge off that headache, and believe me lass, it'll get worse before it gets better... those stun..."

"Carson...!" Sheppard warned, flicking a glance his way. The doctor immediately coloured slightly. He was used to the people in his infirmary being in complete awareness of the fact that they were in the Pegasus galaxy and had completely forgotten that she had likely arrived from earth somehow, and had no recollection of how she had gotten here. Mouth shut, top secret... etc etc. Not the easiest thing to remember for a medical practitioner.

"Sorry, Colonel. I am sure you will explain everything to this young lady in good time. Until then, I shall attempt to make you comfortable, and that includes some pain relief. If you shut your eyes, I promise I am very gentle with these injections..."

She sighed and John stepped in close as though to block her view of the needle, and watched as her face screwed up slightly as it went into her upper thigh. He wasn't a fan of the needles either, but had no choice but to endure his share of them over the years.

When she had opened her eyes up again, it was to see John looking down at her with a measure of sympathy.

"Damn it, don't look at me as though I'm going to break. Not gonna happen! I just want to get outta here, so please find someone who can authorise that. If this is some top secret facility, then I get that. I didn't see anything, I'll keep my mouth shut, sign a disclaimer, plead ignorance... whatever you want me to do. I hate hospitals, doctors terrify me and I really just want to leave... ok?"

"Easy tiger... put those claws away. How about I go and rustle up that coffee... and then we'll talk... hmmm?"

She looked up at him somewhat suspiciously, but managed a nod. He seemed sincere and did not seem to pose an immediate threat and anyway... if she could get him out of the room, then she could make some sort of attempt to escape. She needed to find her cameras and get out of here. Wherever here was...


	3. Chapter 3 The tiger has claws

CHAPTER 3 – THE TIGER HAS CLAWS

She must have looked suitably calm because the doctor – Carson? - moved away out of her sight and she was able to put her somewhat sketchy plan into action. Plan? Didn't really have one, just knew that she needed to get out of this place and make good her escape.

She knew this time, that she would have to give herself a few moments to get her precious equilibrium before attempting to actually put one foot in front of the other. The pain meds were already beginning to work, and she surmised that she had likely been given morphine or pethedine – fast working but could be slightly debilitaing. Which meant she would have to move fast.

Huffing a few experimental breaths, she released the hold on the side of the bed and stepped cautiously into the middle of the room. So far, so good. The military man had not returned, nor had the doctor, so if she was going to attempt an escape, now would be the good time.

She made it to the infirmary door and peered around the doorway, noting that long hallways ran either side and were at this time, empty. She drew herself up to full height, intending to look as though she belonged here in case she was stopped.

She managed to get up the length of one hallway and down another before meeting another person. Dressed in similar clothes to the doctor, obviously non military and Nicole smiled a tentative greeting at him, watching as he moved into an small room that looked like an elevator. She scrambled to follow him before the door closed, and upping the wattage of her smile, while attempting to push down the pain that was now returning in powerful waves, she entered the elevator and waited until he had turned to the screen on the wall.

The man, smiling back at her – drew up his eyebrows in query. "Where to? I'm heading down to the labs."

She thought fast, even with the pain medication coursing through her system, she attempted to keep her mind as sharp as she could. Labs, ok – so that meant some sort of research facility perhaps? Keeping her voice as neutral as possible, she brought the first name to mind that she could.

"Ah, storage facility thanks. Need to pick up my equipment." He threw a slightly puzzled look her way, pushed what she hoped was the required indication on the screen and turned to face her.

"Haven't seen you around here before. New recruit? What department?"

His accent was American and that was a relief to her. She also noted that he had an American flag sewn onto his shirt, while the doctor had proudly worn the scottish flag. Perhaps this particular facility was under the control of more than one government, and she saw in her mind, a new story beginning to almost write itself. Perhaps she would not be in such a hurry to escape after all.

She smiled at him now. Nicole Harmon was nothing if not persuasive and not just because of her stunning looks. Although that certainly helped things along more than just a little. She could also spin a good story and pretty much lie her way out of anything – all the prerequsites for a good photo journalist.

"Public relations. And you?"

He gave her another puzzled look. "Public relations? Don't tell me they're opening this place up to the American public. Wouldn't that open a big nasty can of worms. Anyway, I'm Frank and one of the scientists in the biochemistry section. We've been looking into the photo neurons that are being exhibited from that plant Dr McKay brought back from P9T129. Fascinating. The properties are mind blowing, really."

He smiled expectantly at her, and she felt her own smile dim just a little. He spoke another language, and while she had a limited science background, this was beyond her.

"Sounds fascinating, but I really need to be going..."

"No problem, this is your stop." The elevator that was not an elevator – even while she had been listening to him she had known that there was something seriously state of the art about this particular elevator. It made no noise, neither did it appear to move at all. Simply it was there... then here and when the door opened, it was onto a floor similar to the one she had just stepped off, with doorways leading who knew where.

She stepped out, wary about being alone in this strange place, but knew that once the alarm went up regarding her escape from the infirmary, it was unlikely that she would be able to trust anyone that she met.

Once the doors had closed on her new friend, she turned and felt a wave of sickness, accompanied by pain – moved up rapidly through her body. Whatever had hit her was now having another side effect and with the combination of the high powered painkiller, she knew that she should really be lying prone somewhere until the effects of it passed. But she had to find her equipment, and pushing down the nausea and attempting to ignore the pain, she moved down the hallway, wondering which room was the storage facility she was looking for.

She could find no traditional door openings, but noting a control panel beside each door, the simple action of waving her hand in front the panel opened it, and she took a deep breath. This place was more than state of the art, and Nicole was determined to get to the bottom of it.

She had just entered her third room, not finding what she was looking for she was about to enter a fourth, when she heard the sound of running footsteps. Knowing that her disappearance had been discovered and her knew friend had likely given up the information that a strange woman had ridden on the elevator with him, she moved back into the room and allowed the door to close.

The footsteps paused outside and she held her breath and carefully moved back into a darkened corner, looking around frantically for some sort of hiding space. There were shelves, and these appeared to be deep enough for cover, so moving carefully and trying not to notice the raging headache, she pushed herself as far back into the shelves as she could, and like a small child, closed her eyes hoping that whoever came into the room, wouldn't see her.

No such luck. She felt her arm grabbed non too gently and she was pulled unceremoniously from her hiding spot and opening her eyes, saw the military man who had seemed more or less kind, from the infirmary.

"Damn it woman! What is with you? You don't want to get yourself lost in this city... it could be days before you are found … are you nuts?"

She blinked her eyes. City? This was a city? Questions began spiralling around her head, and mixing with the mother of all headaches and the continued nausea, she simple groaned and leaned against the hard body of the man whose grip on her arms was painfully tight.

He muttered an oath and gentled his touch, pulling her against him and wrapping his arms securely around her.

"You need to be lying down, not running around this city making me just about have a heart attack. Damn it..." His voice was definitely softer and she leaned into his touch, wondering why she was attempting to escape... suddenly it did not seem so important anymore.

"Let's get you somewhere safe, and we'll see what we can do about getting you some sort of security clearance and giving you some answers. Perhaps that'll stop you attempting to escape every moment..." There was some amusement in his voice, and as she drifted in and out of awareness, she heard a buzzing, then his voice came from a long way away. Her legs buckled then, and she heard him mutter another oath as he simply lifted her into his arms and peered down at her pale face.

"Back to bed. If I don't have your word that you won't attempt to escape, I'll have to use restraints, and I'd hate to bruise those pretty wrists. Or abuse your first amendment rights..."

She didn't answer, didn't really have the energy or the strength , just closed her eyes and let him carry her out of the room. Felt the comfort of his hard body as it carried her and the security of not having to think for a short time. Then she felt nothing at all as consciousness left her and missed the bemused look he gave her still face and the way he lifted her a little higher so that she fit tightly against him.


	4. Chapter 4 Special clearance

CHAPTER 4 – SPECIAL CLEARANCE

Carson was not amused when John arrived back in the infirmary with his escaped patient. Not amused at all. With either the patient, the man holding her or the situation.

"You need to tell her something Colonel. It's unfair to expect to take all this at face value without any explanation, nothing."

"I know that Doc, but I need to get her security clearance before we go down that road, and we need to find out how the hell she went through that stargate. Bermuda Triangle? I mean, how does that translate to stargate. Without information at our end, how do I give her any answers?"

"That clearance John... no longer a problem. Jack... General O'Neill's given me the word. We can give her some answers, in return for some of our own. When she wakes up? Let me know and I'll come back down. I prefer to be here myself when you tell her anything."

Sam had come into the room and stood looking down at the woman.

"We've found ID in her pockets and ran it through the system at the SGC. She's a photo journalist , freelance... that much she told you is true. And she was in the Triangle on commission as stated. Jack looked into what could have happened. Got hold of the skipper of the boat she chartered – apparently he saw her fall overboard, went in after her but she just disappeared. This was two days ago. They've been searching for her body ever since – but she's been classed as 'missing presumed dead' as far as the authorities are concerned. Her name is Nicole Harmon."

"Nicole... yeah, name suits her. What do we do with her? If she goes back, what is her story?"

John had sat down in the chair beside the bed and looked thoughtfully at her pale face, watching as Carson bustled around casting anxious glances in their direction.

"Nice of you to talk around me... I'm right here..." The chocolate eyes were open and staring at him, and he felt a vague sense of discomfort before something warm and unfamiliar made itself known.

"Hey... how's that headache...?" He smiled across at her and saw that there was a little less pain in her eyes and hoped that the sleep had helped things a little bit.

"Not so debilitating... but I'm curious. You seem to know my name so that would presume you have been through my things and found my ID. Violations of my private rights are escalating it would seem. Perhaps you can return the favour and do me the courtesy of telling me who you are?"

Her voice held no amusement, only censure and he huffed a breath, wondering where to start. Sam beat him to the punch.

"You were correct Nicole. This is a military facility of sorts... and very secret. My name is Colonel Samantha Carter and this is Colonel John Sheppard. I administer this facility and John here? He is the military commander. This facility... there is only one way to get here and that is by a very special means that I could not possibly begin to explain to you – we would have to show you for you to understand. What we are especially interested in, is finding out how you managed to arrive here in this manner."

"Through that... ring? I was disorientated, and scared... when I arrived. But I do remember the feeling. The intense cold, the terror, like being on an out of control roller coaster... but I have no memory of stepping into or onto anything... just the boat... then being here and only pieces of the in between."

Her breath hitched and John watched as her eyes brightened, tears filling them but not spilling over. He watched fascinated, wanting to reach out and run his thumb across her eyes, allowing the moisture to spill over.

"This facility is a long way from where you began your journey... longer than you can possibly imagine. Most people who become privy to this facility, have a science or military background, and already have a working knowledge of what this is, and what this means. To take a lay person, such as yourself and attempt to give them a lesson in something that to most people is simply inconceivable... I'm having difficulty finding the right words. John? Step in any time you want..."

Nicole's eyes had been on Sam, but they moved now to take in the handsome Colonel with the tousled dark brown hair and she remembered the strength in his body as he had lifted her as though she weighed nothing and the feel of his arms around her. Security.

"Thanks Sam... much appreciated. Ok Nicole... this is a really broad picture of what we are. What do you know about wormholes..."

Nicole's eyes opened wide and she struggled to sit up, pushing the blanket aside impatiently.

"You're talking about space, aren't you? Is this some sort of secret space station. Are we in space, somewhere?"

She tried to move her legs over the side of the bed to get up, but John rose and placed his hands on her shoulders to still her movements and keep her in the bed.

"Ahh yeah... somewhere... That wormhole? That ring you stepped through? That device was built by an ancient alien race who found a way to harness the power of a wormhole, a means to travel instantaneously from one point in space to another. From earth... to here."

Nicole pushed his hands away and slid off the bed, leaning against it for support, looking up at him.

"And where exactly is here?"

"The Pegasus galaxy – which would be next to the Milky Way galaxy..."

"Oh..."

She seemed to deflate a little and he reached out a hand to support her in case she fell. Finding some sort of strength, she even summoned a small smile and pulled herself up straight again, holding his gaze, chocolate brown eyes to hazel green ones.

His hand reached out and touched hers lightly. "Fancy a tour? I've given your information to some of our scientists here and on earth, and they need to find out how you got here, in case we get any more unwelcome guests. So not expecting someone like you to casually walk through the gate, if we were a little shocked and surprised, you now know why."

"No one knows about this? Outside of military?"

"Scientists and military – and we work with a sort of coalition – other countries are involved. But essentially the US military, primarily airforce, run this show. You're a photographer? The sights out here are essentially amazing, unlike anything you will see on earth. Unfortunately we can't allow you to photograph anything to take back to earth. Security... the general public cannot know about this project – they're years away from being ready to accept that sort of knowledge."

Anger showed on her face now. "Such arrogance! What gives you the right to presume what the public can and cannot know? What they are ready to know? Who gets to decide that? You? The US airforce?"

"Aaah Nicole... spoken like a true journalist... which is why we would not allow any out here in Pegasus. Yes, we make that call for now. Somebody has to. Imagine the mass hysteria if they were to suddenly be confronted with this knowledge. How did you feel when you first heard – that first instinct? Fear..."

She closed her eyes and ran a hand across her face in resignation. "What is going to happen to me?"

"The powers that be get to decide your fate I guess... for now? I can offer you a tour of the city so you can see for yourself exactly what magic is out here light years from where you thought you were. Allow me?"

He held out an arm and she looked down at it, as if in thought. Coming to a decision she placed her hand on it and allowed him to tuck it into his elbow and pull her a little closer.

"For now..." she replied. "But I want the whole story, and I won't allow you to put a gag on me and keep this quiet. I have the right to know, as do all of mankind..."

"Aaahh.. a gag. What a wonderful idea..." he murmured and earned a slap on the arm from Nicole. Sam watched them go and shook her head. Seems their irrepressible Colonel had met his match.


	5. Chapter 5 No photographs allowed

CHAPTER 5 – NO PHOTOGRAPHS ALLOWED

"So how do you stand it? Look but not touch..."

She stood out on the east pier, back to the water and face turned to looked at the majestic view that rose tall and beautiful in front of her. Atlantis. From it's tallest spire all the way down to the east pier where they now stood. Nicole could not get enough of the vista, and held out her arms to encompass the view that held her so mesmerised.

John's eyes were on the woman who stood before him, not on the view. "Look but not touch? I'm kinda getting that about now..."

It took a couple of seconds for his comment to sink in and she looked at him sharply. "Colonel Sheppard? Are you attempting to flirt with me?"

"Attempting... ouch... that kinda hurt..."

"I'm glad it did, that was the intention. Here I am – arrived somehow? From earth to here, neither of us have any idea. I'm standing in an alien city, beneath a sky that is more than a hundred light years from where I woke up two days ago, and you attempt to flirt with me? Forgive me if it seems a little trite from where I'm standing..."

John huffed a breath, then laughed. "Yeah, well... put like that ..."

"My hands itch to hold a camera and take just a tiny snapshot of this beauty. Can you imagine what that feels like?" Her voice held wonder.

"Oh yeah... I can most certainly imagine... what that feels like."

Again that sharp glance was slanted his way, this time he was prepared for it and widened his eyes innocently at her.

"Where are my cameras, Colonel Sheppard? Please... this is torture."

"No cameras Nicole, I explained that to you. And as to torture... well, join the damn club." He said this last a little huffily and she couldn't resist a small laugh. He really was rather cute – once she got past the fact that she was more or less being held here against her will, although taking in this stunning view, even that did not seem such a hardship. Perhaps she could take up painting and capture the picture in her mind, before going home and recreating it in oils or watercolours. Her fingers itched to play with a shutter and set up a tripod, and it was a somewhat sulky face she turned on the Colonel.

He had taken her through the city and given her the abbreviated foot tour before culminating out here on the east pier. It was one of his favourite places. He came out here to run, to be alone, to think – sometimes just to be... A small part of him was glad that she had felt the same way when she had first stepped out onto it. He thought briefly, then touched her hand to get her attention.

"Fancy a trip into space...?"

He watched the excitement bloom on her face and those chocolate brown eyes took on the consistency of warm treacle and he found himself staring into them a little longer than was possibly deemed polite.

"Are you kidding? You can go up there?" She pointed a finger upward and his own hand reached out to curl a stand of hair behind her ears, watching as her eyes sharpened just a little at the action. He pulled his hand away quickly, not even sure what had driven him to do it and smiled.

"A little ship we call a jumper... flies up and into space... way into space. I can take you for a little spin, if you're up to it?"

"I won't get air sick... or space sick?"

"Inertial dampeners, we don't feel the G's even when we're pulling them... let's go." It was natural to reach down and take her hand, and she didn't protest, barely flicked her eyes to their joined hands. Excitement radiated from her and he thought of the different woman who had come through the gate not several hours earlier. Angry, like a tiny warrior – compared to this warm, exciteable childlike version. And wasn't sure which one he preferred.

He explained to her how the jumper worked with a mind interface and also explained that all Lantien systems required the ATA or ancient gene in order to activate them. She was a captive audience and knew that it was her natural curiousity as well as her reporter instincts that made her hang onto every word that he said. She watched carefully what he did when they stepped into the jumper and asked him to remove his hands, placing her own there. He watched in fascination as the jumper immediately reacted to her and acknowledged that she carried the ancient gene and stored that information away. Definitely information that he'd be passing on to Sam when he got back. Subsconsciously he began filing away pertinent information about her and it was in the process of doing just that he began to wonder if perhaps it was how she had managed to use the energy in the Bermuda Triangle to get from one galaxy to another.

"So – can I fly?" Her eyes were alight now and he took a moment to just stare at her, before shaking his head.

"That would be a no! A very definite no..."

"Afraid I'd show you up, Colonel?"

"I've flown every aircraft known to mankind, and many not known. So, that would also be a no!"

"Spoilsport... can I at least steer?"

"Doesn't work like that Nicole. I control this with my mind. Do you see any steering wheel or accelerator? Hmmm? So, do you want to take a quick trip into space or sit down here in the jumper bay arguing about who has the biggest balls...?"

She quirked her eyebrow at him, unsure how to take his humour.

"Well seeing as I don't have any, that would be you..."

"Hhmphhh... not so sure about that!" He opened the jumper bay doors and gently brought the craft up so that it rose gracefully toward the roof and out the top. He deliberately punched it, so that the craft accelerated fast and took them up into space where she gasped with something a little more than awe.

"Oh Colonel... words and pictures.. they are my life, my reason to be... but this? I can't find the words, and I don't need the pictures... I'll carry them here..." she touched her heart and her head. "...forever... thank you. Even if I go home tomorrow, I'll never forget this – ever."

He made a decision and lifted his hands from the controls, watching as her eyes widened.

"Fly her, Nicole."

She squeaked and lifted her hands, unsure where to put them.

"Come here. Sit in this seat." He got up and allowed her to sit down, coming in behind her and placing her hands onto the controls, and placing his own hands on top of hers. He felt the shaking and knew that she was nervous, but keeping his hands soft on hers, he leaned down and spoke softly into her ear.

"Simply think about what you want the jumper to do. She's a finely tuned woman – treat her with disrespect and she'll give you the proverbial finger. Treat her softly and well, and you'll be friends for life. Just think..."

And she did just that, laughing as his hands stayed firm on hers and the jumper went into a tight spin that had John gasping a little for breath, then laughing himself.

"Ok, so that was just showing off..."

"Yep... sure was. Oh, this is incredible, beyond anything I could have imagined. I have spent my life Colonel, looking for the perfect picture, that perfect moment in time to capture. And out here, like this? I think perhaps I have found it. How can I go back to earth after experiencing this? Tell me that..."

"Not my decision Nicole... the powers that be pretty much hold your future in their hands. But you have the gene... that's pretty good currency out here... You really wanna stay? You've only been here a few hours, and this? This is the beautiful and the best... there's that, and more. Lots of crap out here, different crap than you find on earth. An alien race that sucks the life out of humans... the worst sort of enemy that you could possibly imagine. It's a hard life out here – different rules than what you are used to on earth. And the decision? It'll be made based on what you can bring to the programme."

Her eyes were focused out the front viewing window, wide and excited and he knew they were taking in everything right down to the most minute detail. She dragged her eyes away to look over her shoulder at him, his face close to hers and saw the warm look in his eyes. "Maybe they'll decide to document it, for posterity.. one day it will be released to the public. They won't be able to keep it a secret forever."

"Maybe Nicole... maybe. Let's go back. Let me fly her in...I've got a reputation to maintain." He removed his hands so that she could move back to her own chair, and felt a little bereft at the loss of contact.

"Hot damn Colonel Sheppard... I just flew a space ship."

"That you did..." And couldn't help laughing at the wide grin that had appeared on her face. The same smile that he himself had had the first time he flew this very same ship.


	6. Chapter 6 More than she bargained for

CHAPTER 6 – MORE THAN SHE BARGAINED FOR

Sam was waiting for them in the jumper bay when they returned and she looked quizzically at the bright open expression on Nicole's face, and the excitement that radiated there, across her features and buzzing just below the surface. And wondered just what had put it there.

"John? Care to explain to me why you are taking civilians for joy rides in space... hmmm?" She spoke a little in jest, but John sensed an edge to her words and wondered if perhaps he had overstepped his boundaries a little.

"Wasn't a joy ride Sam... I wanted her to see what we do out here – what makes this home to us. A little something you'll be interested to file away in that extremely intelligent mind of yours... she has the gene."

Sam's eyesbrows rose. "Ok... so I'd say that tips the scales a little. I've just been on the radio with the SGC. They're no closer to finding out how she got here – they're adamant that there is only the two working gates, the one at the SGC and the one in Antarctica. But the gene? That changes things... gives us a whole new perspective on just what might have happened. Ah... Rodney is going to have a field day with this piece of information!"

"So, Colonel Carter? What are you intending to do with me? Now that I've somehow managed to breach national security, are you going to 'silence' me?" She only half spoke in jest and John huffed a laugh, watching her slightly tense posture. Hands fisted on extremely trim hips and eyes sparking – no longer warm treacle.

"We don't 'silence' people Nicole – you've been watching too many movies... perhaps a little reprogramming Sam?"

At Nicole's startled look, Sam gave John a warning one. "Stop teasing her John. This is serious. Her future is on the line here, and I'm not talking about her life – I mean her future on earth. If she were to return, she would have to take up a new profession and it would be unlikely that you would be allowed to publish... ever. That is as far reaching as their power would be. They would ensure that anything you attempted to write or publish, would be squashed down so deep and if something did come to light, you would be immediately discredited as a crackpot. That would effectively be the end of your career."

They both watched the anger that bloomed in Nicole's eyes and her cheeks flushed pink. "That is ridiculous. You just effectively told me that this is not a movie. Hell, this is worse than a movie. My life, as I know it – ceases to exist if I go back to earth? Kill me now..."

"I know it seems harsh Nicole, and I can sympathise. I chose this – John chose this. This is where we want to be and what we want to do. You have been dropped into this and you have choices taken away from because of that. I'll do what I can from my end, but you're up against the US government on this one and your choices will be limited. I'm sorry. But given that you have the gene, that opens a whole new chapter with which I can negotiate with. You up for that?"

John had moved in behind her and Nicole could feel the warmth of his body, not touching but just there. Offering comfort of a sort, but not what she needed right now. She needed answers, and as a journalist, she would find them. Any way she could.

"What do I do now, Colonel Carter? Tell me that? What are my options? I am an intelligent woman, I understand the implications of my appearance here. I understand that you need to find out how I came to be here and whether this breaches any sort of security you have firmly in place. But understand me! I won't be held a prisoner. If I stay, it will be because I decide to stay. Are we clear on that? Take a message back to your damn superiors... it will be up to me!"

She whirled around, leaving the lingering warmth that John's body had afforded and stormed out of the jumper bay. Not really sure where she was going, but knowing that she needed to blow off some steam and clear her head. She would normally photograph about now. Use all of that passion and energy and put it into taking stunning photographs, and if she couldn't do that for now? Then exercise. Run herself into a puddle somewhere... somehow, so that she could come to terms with the crossroads her life had come to right now. She recalled that during the quick foot tour, Colonel Sheppard had shown her a training area, a gym. Lose herself on the treadmill, run off her demons. Then make a decision.

And she did just that. While jeans were not the most suitable attire for running, she at least had on sneakers and tank top, and tossing all of that hair into a ponytail she easily set the treadmill for a comfortable pace and began the routine of working up a sweat and purging herself of her demons.

So immersed in her own thoughts, she failed to see the Colonel standing in front of her for some time and when she finally registered his presence she almost missed her beat and fell flat on her face. His hand sneaked around and lowered the speed on the treadmill, and she noticed that he held both a towel and a water bottle in his other hand, and at the moment both of those items looked more than a little inviting.

He didn't speak, just watched her as the speed wound down and she was breathing easily and running lightly, warming down the muscles that had been running at full capacity for almost two hours. _Two hours?_ Her eyebrows quirked upward as she registered the time on the treadmill and met his amused eyes. _Ok, so that is why he stands here with a peace offering of sorts... must have thought I was going to blow a gasket or something..._ As the treadmill slowly stopped, she reached out a hand, grasping the towel he offered first and wiping it non too gently across her face and back of her neck, then reaching up she pulled out the elastic that secured her ponytail and let the curls cascade back over her shoulders. His eyes followed their path and one hand reached out to push one of the curls aside that had gotten stuck on the strap of her tanktop, and the feel of his light, seemingly casual touch felt like fire – a fire that she refused to acknowledge.

Next came the water and she gulped in relief. The air here was different... and she had to push down a laugh at that thought. Of course it was different – a hundred light years away from normal, it wouldn't be anything but.

"So... some of that anger burned itself out yet? I do the same... when things start to overwhelm me, I run. It's like the miles purge the bad out of you, the pounding of your feet form some random rythym in your head and everything you do becomes revolved around that rythym."

She looked at him in surprise, but chose not to answer. Those were her reasons for running also and she hadn't heard it voiced quite like that by another person. It sounded... right, when he said it.

He reached down at his feet where she noticed for the first time, there sat a duffle type bag. His voice was gruff now as he handed it to you.

"A change of clothes in there... and something else I thought you'd appreciate."

Surprised and more than a little curious, she opened the bag and joy reached up immediately and washed over her face. She reached down first and ran a hand over her beloved cameras, then that same hand reached out and touched his arm, lightly.

"Thank you. They are an extension of me... without them? It's like my arm has been cut off. So, still 'no photo' policy... or can I sneak in... just a few?"

He watched with curiousity as the passion sparked in her eyes, and he wondered what it would feel like to be on the receiving end of that passion. And decided he kind of wanted to find out.

"Click away sweetheart. If and when you go back to earth, they'll be confiscated – the photos, not the cameras... but why deprive you for now. Sam has allocated some quarters for you while you are here, and as I said, there's a change of clothes and some toiletries in there, and I've got Teyla rounding up a few more personal bits and pieces to make your stay as comfortable as possible. I'll introduce you to my team – Ronon you've met. Dinner... would be a good time to get to know everyone."

"Oh, I want to go and photograph so badly... but I think a shower is probably the first and foremost, so if you could show me where I'm staying?"

She slung the duffle over her shoulder and waited for him to move ahead so she could follow. He turned back briefly.

"I can vouch for sunset around here... photo wise. More than just a little stunning. Sun sets a little later here, so maybe after dinner I'll show you a great place to take your shots."

Before he turned back she quirked her eyebrows at him. "Still flirting with me Colonel Sheppard?"

"Trying... is it working?"

"Not yet... but keep trying. Some things need a little more work than others..."

"Yeah... the good things..."

She smiled and followed him out of the gym.


	7. Chapter 7 Life through a lens

CHAPTER 7 – LIFE THROUGH A LENS

A shower was heaven and as she flopped across her bed, arms spread wide and staring up at the ceiling, she pondered these past few hours. Beyond comprehension really and wondered when she woke up in the morning, whether she would be back on earth doing what she did best... or out _here. _Wherever _here _was.

The Colonel had thoughtfully provided a spare base uniform until they could locate some clothes to fit her and as she rolled across the bed to look over to where she had lain them out, she chuckled. A non comformist most of her life, the thought of wearing what was basically military attire, was an oxymoron really. Against the establishment, sock it to the man... Nicole Harmon now under the wing of a military commander on a secret military base...some things came to pass for a reason. This one? Couldn't possibly begin to get her head around this one.

Her thoughts moved to the Colonel. His sense of humour was a little surprising and quite refreshing. Her experience with the military to date had been of stuffy, overly serious types who tended to view her rather extravagant personality as foolish and trivial. It didn't hurt that he was good looking... hell, make that _hot!_ But relationships of any kind were not on the cards for her. Not on earth and certainly not out _here._

_Not gonna happen Colonel John Sheppard, so save the flirting for someone who'll appreciate it. I'm sure you have more than your willing share of ladies out here who will jump at the chance to have those cheeky hazel eyes feast on them._

She laughed, and got up to get dressed, eager to meet some more of the people from this city and take some photos of the promised sunset. The clothing was certainly not an ideal fit. Obviously sized for the larger boned women, these hung a little at the hips and she had to use the belt from her own jeans to pull them in tight in order to hold them up. Fortunately the base shirt was also large, and hung down mid thigh so that it covered the pulled in trousers.

_Ok, so not a fashion statement Nicole – but hey, who cares? Certainly you're not trying to make an impression on anyone... so, as long as they cover the basic bits, who the hell really cares._

She spied the balcony beyond the room, and opening the doors stepped out onto it to watch the sun as it began it's inevitable descent towards the vast ocean. Leaning on the rail she sighed. It was peaceful out here, no doubt about it. No traffic noise, no people noise, no... nothing. Just the silence that came from a world that was not overrun by humanity.

She went back in and got out her cameras, and stepping back on the balcony she was soon engrossed in taking shots. Trying angles and different settings and so involved with her work that she did not notice the knock on her door, then a few minutes later, the Colonel walking in to stand at the balcony door to watch her. Her face was alive when she was photographing, he saw that immediately. Her hands were sure and handled the equipment the same way he would handle a gun. Definitely as though it was an extension to her. He smiled, and in that instant she brought her camera around and caught that pensive smile and the warm hazel eyes and knew that she had also captured the inner man, the one that he likely kept fairly well hidden for personal reasons.

"So... see anything you like, Nicole?" She wasn't sure if he was referred to the view or the photo she had just taken, and chose not to rise to his baiting.

"I see a lot I like... the camera will see something else. I'll show you later, if you're interested. If you have a laptop I can connect my USB to?"

His response was slightly guarded, and he continued to watch her, the way the breeze lifted those curls and settled them back down on her shoulders. He couldn't help but notice the base attire did not fit her small frame, and fought down a laugh. It didn't seem to bother her and he got the impression that fashion was not a high priority with this woman.

She lowered her camera, turning it off and went to push past him to return it to her room, but he caught her arm. She didn't look up at him, kept her eyes down on her camera, and he let go of her arm and tugged on a curl to get her to look up. "What's your story Nicole? You're like a photograph yourself... layers of colour and hidden depths I think. One would have to spend a lot of time looking at the photo to get the true meaning of why it was taken. Is that you?"

"Depends on your definition of hidden depths Colonel. Not much mystery in this woman... what you see is what you get..."

"Hmmm... what I get? Kinda like the sound of that..."

"Metaphorically speaking Colonel..."

"Oh, I'm sure it was. And it's just "John" - ok? Ditch the "Colonel". You're not military so you are not required to address me by rank."

"Ok, so "just John"... you promised me a dinner of some description... but just to clarify things, this is not a date by any definition. Ok?"

"Scouts honour!" He held the the two fingers of the scout salute and she laughed.

"Why do I get the feeling you were never a boy scout, John."

The walked companionably to the mess and as he stood back and allowed her to step through the door first, he noticed immediately the stir her entrance had caused. Not just the illfitting base attire, no... she was stunning and in a superbly natural way that was completely unaffected. He spotted Ronon and Teyla at a table and guided her in that direction, noticing that Rodney was weaving his way toward the same table, fully loaded tray with evening meal and the inevitable jello.

She stood a little uncertainly at the table before sitting down, waiting for John to make the requisite introductions. Ronon looked at her with frank curiousity, and a measure of interest in his eyes. She returned his look steadily and pushed a clear message into her own eyes. Not interested, so keep the flirting games down to a minimum. Obviously he got the message more or less clearly, a delighted smile lit up his face and he nodded his head at her, looking somewhat assessingly at John.

"This Nicole, is the one responsible for the headache you've been experiencing today. Ronon Dexx of Sateda..."

"You're the one who shot me? Damn, but that hurt. And Sateda? Got the feeling I won't find that on any map of earth."

She shot out a hand and he took it deliberately and shook it firmly but she noticed that he did not attempt to apologise for shooting her.

She was introduced to Teyla and Rodney. The other woman looked at her a little warily as though wondering at the easy closeness that John and her already seemed to share and Rodney's interest was immediately piqued, especially once he realised that this was the woman who had arrived here from the Bermuda Triangle.

"So, Nicole? Sam told me that I can spend some time testing your gene sample tomorrow. To see what sort of effect it has on some of the equipment here. I have something here that supposedly simulates the mythical effect of the Bermuda Triangle – I say mythical because it has never been proven, but I'm sure if you're a journalist and you were out there doing some sort of photo exposay on it, then that would hardly come as a surprise to you..."

"Rodney...?"

"Yes, Sheppard?" Rodney paused in his rambling monologue to look at the Colonel.

"Shut up. Now."

"Oh..." He coloured slightly and looked between John and Nicole.

Nicole pushed down a laugh and addressed Rodney, feeling surprisingly taken by the somewhat effusive scientist. "That's fine Rodney, I understand and I'm happy to spend time helping you test your device tomorrow... as long as you let me photograph you while you work. You have an … interesting face and when you talk about your work it becomes animated and so expressive. I would love to capture those expressions."

"Oh hell Nicole... don't feed into his already overinflated ego... please! The man already thinks he's some sort of God."

She let some of the bantering wash over her, feeling John's eyes resting on her from time to time, and felt a weariness begin to permeate her limbs. It had been a strange and unsettling day and she wasn't sure what her thoughts and emotions were at the moment. She knew that she was tired, no – make that exhausted and a part of her just wanted to drop into bed and seek the oblivion only sleep can bring. Another part of her wanted to walk out into the sunset and take the most stunning pictures of her career. Yawning widely, earning an amused look from John, she stood and excused herself.

"Sunset awaits people. Thank you for your hospitality this evening, I believe my cameras are calling me rather urgently. Tomorrow, Rodney?"

John had risen also and casting a quick look at the others, he issued a somewhat terse goodnight and followed Nicole out of the mess.

Teyla raised her eyebrows at Ronon. "It would appear that John has developed a new interest."

"Yeah... shoulda shot him as well." Grumbling a little he pushed away from the table to go and get some dessert.

He allowed her to gather up her cameras and deliberating keeping some distance between them he allowed an easy silence to fall as they made their way to one of the upper level balconies of the control tower. Pushing outside, Nicole paused in the doorway, feeling John close behind her, his warmth a fraction too close for comfort.

The sun had lower majestically to the horizon and it hung there suspended, awaiting the moment that it would simply paint the sky with unimaginable colours.

"Oh..." Words seemed somehow inadequate and as she fumbled to get her camera out of the duffle, John chuckled slightly and gripped the bag so that she wouldn't drop it. He remained close, while she quickly disposed off lens caps and adjusted her long lens, fiddling slightly with her settings before bringing it to her face. He no longer watched the sunset, he only watched her and the transformation that crept across her face. He had to thrust his hands in his pockets to stop them from reaching out and stroking her hair, and turning, he pulled his gaze away from her and tried to concentrate on the sunset.

He heard her sigh and turning back to her saw the sheen of tears in her eyes. Slightly alarmed he started forward, but she blinked once and turned quickly, putting her camera away and fumbling in her haste to get away.

"Hey...?" He didn't know what had just happened, struggled to process the change from spellbound woman to upset woman. She pushed past him and started running and he dragged a hand through his hair, debating going after her, but thought better of it. Give her some distance. He knew how overwhelming this was likely for her at the moment, and knew that tiredness played a role in how she was feeling now.

But half an hour later he was knocking at her door, concerned. He had to make sure she was all right, and when he received no reply, he knocked again and went to open the door himself.

It slid open before he could, and she stood on the other side and he could see clearly that she had been crying.

"Nicole? Do you want to talk?"

"Go, John... I don't like people to see me weak like this... I prefer to be alone. Please, just go..."

"And I have this strong, rather innate urge to protect. Especially women who have been through a hell of a lot in the course of one day. So... you gonna let me in?"

"Not a good idea, John... really..."

"Catching you at a weak moment? Scared you'll do something you regret?"

"I don't regret my actions, John. I just don't allow myself to make the mistakes that would allow me those regrets..."

"Aaah... a woman always in control of her emotions. I don't think life is that simple. Making those supposed emotional mistakes are what makes us human, makes us feel."

"Feeling too much... yeah, overrated and very painful. So, if you'll excuse me John. I'm going to crawl into bed and wallow a little in my own misery for now, and no doubt I'll wake in the morning with crystal clear vision and the need to move forward."

"On your own?"

"On my own..." But her eyes held his for just a moment too long before she closed the door and he wondered at just much alone she really wanted to be. He touched the closed door lightly with his forehead and rested it for a moment. It was going to be a long night. Alone.


	8. Chapter 8 Any secrets left in Bermuda?

CHAPTER 8 – ANY SECRETS LEFT IN BERMUDA?

She remained in limbo the following morning. The SGC had still no idea what they wanted to do with her and she began to feel a little like a prisoner of war. Caught between two places and welcome in none. A tough place to be, by anyone's definition.

Rodney gave her some perspective. She could help him try and find out exactly how she got there and perhaps that would allow the powers that be to come up with a decision on her behalf. It was with this in mind that she found herself in his laboratory the next morning, staring curiously around at the many gadgets and devices that he had placed strategically around the room, in various states of dismemberment. She went to pick one up and almost dropped it when he barked a quick command not to touch anything, and she quickly removed her hands and placed them behind her back. To give herself something to do until he deigned to give her him full attention, she pulled out a camera and began taking casual shots, trying to capture his expressions and intensity as he looked thoughtfully at his laptop, seeming to have forgotten that she was even in the room.

Something made him look up and catch her about to take another shot, and she quickly increased the shutter speed to take fast speed photos as the expression changed to a more guarded one on his face. It was these human emotions that appealed to the photographer in her, and the way that people chose to hide certain parts of themselves from the world. She had learnt early on, that the camera had the ability to pick up the parts that were hidden. Something that had won her many awards as a photographer.

"I can come back Rodney – if you're busy...?" She tried to be understanding. In his shoes she would have been annoyed at having the extra task added to his workload, and tried to give him an out should he need to take it.

"No... I'm good. Just pulling up something similar to the mythical properties of the Bermuda Triangle. We had a device on earth, found by one of the SG teams – a mirror. It led through to different dimensions – the premise being that there are an infinite number of possibilities, or multi verses out there. All containing basically the same content of what we have in our current universe, but with subtle differences. Or so the theory states. The properties of the mirror have been researched at Area 51 – actually – Sam, Colonel Carter, was one of the physicists responsible for understanding it's properties. I suspect that you fell through something similar when you fell overboard in the Triangle."

She had put her camera down now and watched him fascinated. He became animated when he spoke on a subject that interested him and his hand gestures became effusive. It was like a wind up toy, all energy at first wind, then slowly edging down as the initial enthusiasm began to wane.

"You're talking dimensions? With the mirror? I can't begin to understand multi verses... I have a younger brother who's a gamer and he rants all the time about multi verses, but as I don't get into the games myself, I have no comprehension about he is talking about. But however I came here, I am still in the same dimension – aren't I? And according to your theory, how would I know if I wasn't?"

"Good question, and it's likely you wouldn't, at least not straight away. The differences may be too subtle to notice, but sooner or later something would stand out to you. Something that wasn't quite right."

"Again... out here? How would I know what wasn't right? If I was on earth, yeah – then maybe."

"I want to recreate the exact conditions before you fell into the water. I'll need you to describe exactly what was happening... but if you've blocked some of the events out then we'll need to pull them out of you. With hypnotherapy, perhaps. We have a good pyschiatrist here who might be able to help. She's done some work with hynotherapy and she may be able to take you back to those moments before you fell into the water."

Nicole was dubious. "I don't know that I feel all that comfortable with that. Is there any other way?"

"Any other way for what?"

The Colonel lounged negligently in the doorway, but Nicole wasn't fooled. He may have appeared for all intents and purposes as a casual observer, but she saw immediately the coiled energy in his body ready for action should the need suddenly arise and saw the awareness in those hazel eyes. He was a contradiction, she thought. And a distraction she didn't need.

"We need to get at her memories Sheppard. From just before she hit the water... and while she was in the water. Something happened out there, and she fell through some sort of portal. Time, no – dimensional maybe – or could be just an ordinary, garden variety wormhole... who knows. But Kate Heitmeyer may be able to use hypnotherapy to get at those moments."

John huffed a breath and pushed away from the wall, his eyes keenly observing the small measure of distrust in Nicole's.

"We can't force anyone to undergo hypnotherapy Rodney, you know that. Sometimes it drags up some memories that people just don't want to face, and pulling them out in the open without permission oversteps all sorts of privacy guidelines. I'm sure Miss Harmon would be the first to point that out!"

She watched him approach. They had shared a coffee at breakfast. She'd had a restless night's sleep and noting the shadows under his eyes that morning, it appeared that he had not slept any easier. And wondered at the demons that haunted him.

"You're implying that I have something to hide, Colonel Sheppard?"

"We all have something to hide... Nicole. It's where we hide it and how well, that defines us. I do agree with Rodney – if we can get at those memories, Rodney can attempt to find out just how the hell you got here. I know you'll be wanting some sort of closure on that, and you'll want your choices given back to you, instead of held in limbo here."

"An accurate summary, John – just as I'm sure you'd be happy to be rid of an unwelcome guest that you're most or less forced to babysit." Her voice held a measure of bitterness and he mentally kicked himself. It had not been his intention to make her feel like an unwelcome visitor, and if he had done so, it was certainly not the way he wanted this to go down. He was attracted to her, was able to admit that to himself freely, and would to her if she gave him the chance. But she shut him down whenever the subject hung even slightly in the air and got from that, that she was not interested in any sort of relationship, casual or otherwise.

"Rodney – I'm going to get Carson to take a sample of her DNA to find out what level of ATA she carries in her. Do you want to run a sample through your data banks as well, see if it comes close to activating any of those devices you've put on hold. Needing a stronger gene – a stronger female gene...?"

Rodney looked thoughtful. "I do want to run that Sheppard, but I'm more interesting in finding the link between the Triangle and here. It's always been a bit of an anomaly and there is some hypothesis that the Triangle is linked to Atlantis. Triangle writers have used a number of supernatural concepts to explain the events. One explanation pins the blame on leftover technology from the suposedly mythical lost continent of Atlantis. Sometimes connected to the Atlantis story is the submerged rock formation known as the Bimini Road off the island of Bimini in the Bahamas, which is in the Triangle by some definitions. Followers of the purported psychic Edgar Cayce take his prediction that evidence of Atlantis would be found in 1968 as referring to the discovery of the Bimini Road. Believers describe the formation as a road, wall, or other structure, though geologists consider it to be of natural origin. Here, we may finally have the ability to either officially prove or disprove that all speculation regarding that is either true or false. I have always sat on the fence until we came here. After that, all bets were off!"

John huffed a laugh. "Yeah, finding Atlantis pretty much blew all current theories out of the water, no pun intended. So, Nicole. How about it? We'll not make it an order or a directive. We'll appeal to the journalist, the writer – the one inside you who craves answers to questions that have remained unanswered for an eternity. Help us to connect the dots, and you'll get your own answers as well as some that have been plaguing mankind for more than a lifetime."

"Succinctly put John, and put like that? How can I refuse. So Rodney, lead on. Hypnotise me, stick needles into me... and I don't need to tell you how I _hate_ needles, but I ask one thing. Don't lie to me, don't try to trick me and keep me informed every step of the way. Deal?"

She put out her small hand and Rodney did not hesitate, grasping it quickly and shaking it. She turned to repeat the gesture to John and he hesitated slightly before picking it up in his much larger hand and turning it over so that it rest palm up in his. He stroked it softly with his thumb and she shivered, wondering if she had made the right call. He laughed softly, seeing the uncertainty in her eyes and knew then, that she was not as unaffected by him as she made out. Far from it. Just pushed it down below the surface where it remained just out of sight. But damned if he'd let it stay there for much longer. Sink or swim, and John had always been a very good swimmer.


	9. Chapter 9 Through another's eyes

CHAPTER 9 – THROUGH ANOTHER'S EYES

Kate Heitmeyer was able to see her more or less immediately as soon as she had rescheduled her current appointment. It was therefore with more than just a small measure of trepidation that Nicole paused at the entrance to the doctor's office and smiled at the taller woman. John and Rodney had accompanied her. Rodney to enable him to key pertinent data into his laptop immediately and John as Mr Support, feeling as though he was more or less responsible for her.

"Have you ever been hypnotised before, Nicole? I have a very simple procedure that necessitates you merely sitting in any position you feel comfortable with. You can choose to lie down or sit on the couch over there, or simply sit in the chair opposite my desk. As long as you're comfortable."

Kate smiled at the smaller woman, taking professional note of her wary posture and the almost cornered animal look that had come into her eyes. She rightly assumed, that this woman had very little understanding of just what she had inadvertantly fallen into and was processing information at an alarmingly fast rate in order to play 'catch up'. Kate knew that this could have a very real pyschological effect on anyone, and particularly those who had been exposed to such an extremely intense pool of information.

Nicole forced herself to smile, attempting to push the cornered look out of her eyes. "No, Dr Heitmeyer. I've never participated in a pyschiatric session before so you'll have to excuse me if I seem nervous or uncomfortable." John's eyes were immediately drawn to her small hands, held in front of her and now clasped tightly together. He wanted to step forward and reassure her, take those small hands in his own and rub some warmth into them. But held himself back. Support, yes – but this was Kate's show and he needed to let her take the lead and guide Nicole through it as she wanted to. So he kept his hands to himself for now, and hooded his gaze slightly.

Kate smiled. "That's perfectly understandable Nicole – I'd be more than a little surprised if you weren't intimidated by what you have recently been thrown into and to be honest, I need to let you know that I am impressed with how you seem to be handling everything so far. It takes a lot of strength of character to take on such an enormous amount of 'out there' information when you are least prepared to do so, so hats off to you." She switched her gaze briefly to Rodney.

"Rodney? You're here as observer today?" Kate and Rodney did not always see eye to eye, and Kate was simply making sure that Rodney knew his place in that room today. Watch and keep his mouth shut. As best as he was able, anyway.

"Yes, Kate. I need to see her reactions to questions that you ask, to see if something is merely hidden through natural means or has been pushed down by something less natural. I'm working on a vague theory that will hopefully pan out into something workable once I get a few more answers." Rodney settled himself down in a chair towards the back of the room and began fiddling with his laptop, finding Kate's assessing gaze a little too direct for his liking. She turned her focus to John.

"John?" You're here for security reasons?"

He grasped at that, preferring to admit to that rather than the fact that he simply wanted to offer her some sort of emotional support. Nodding once to Kate, he flicked his eyes between her and Nicole, then moved away from her to stop himself from taking those tense fingers into his own hands once again.

Nicole chose the couch but seated herself, rather than lying down and Rodney moved himself, pulling up a chair beside her but taking care to remain out of Kate's way where the doctor had immediately taken up position behind her. John went to lean against the wall, folding his arms across his chest and dropping his head slightly so that his chin was dipped down, giving him a dark almost forbidding look.

Kate took her under quickly. John had seen her do it before and the speed with which she managed to take a subject under never ceased to amaze him. One minute the person was staring ahead and the next minute their body visibly relaxed and their features slackened slightly, changing perceptibly. Nicole was no exception and he recognised immediately the moment her focus was taken inward after working through the basic relaxation excercises that Kate always began with. Next came a series of base questions, working backwards then bringing her forwards until the day that she was photographing in the Triangle.

It was a beautiful day, blue cloudless sky with an exceptionally calm sea. The boat that had been chartered was owned by a small professionally run company, whose reputation for getting people to the heart of where they wanted to go was impeccable and it was for this reason that Kate had hired their services. Those waiting in Kate's office learnt that Nicole had spent two hours taking photos until the heat had driven her down below deck for some reprieve from the sun and refreshments. She had spread out her chart maps and liased with the captain on where the actual disappearances had occurred. She hadn't known what she was really looking for – perhaps tangible proof that something as large as an entire ship had been able to disappear without a trace.

Deep in her hypnosis, the thoughts had swirled through her mind in the here and now. _Tangible proof? In the form of what per chance? A giant vortex, perhaps... a large black hole that would just sit on the surface of that giant ocean. Waiting for little old me to stumble across it in my enthusiasm and careless naivete? Oh yeah... Get hold of yourself and your whimsical dreams. Pull yourself back into reality. Off on yet another wild goose chase with that damn large pair of rose tinted glasses clamped firmly over your eyes. Looking for the impossible, the unimaginable... the unprovable. Looking for proof? Tangible proof. That life as you know it is a lie..."_

Disgusted with herself she had slapped a hand hard against the charts, and ignoring the protest of the captain, she had grabbed her camera and stormed upstairs to the upper deck to stare pensively out over the water...

Eyes wide, alarm was suddenly evident in every nuance of her body. She screamed then – now, in Atlantis... sitting on the couch allowing a pyschologist to take her back into her memories for something that was hidden. She pushed herself out of the chair, still deep under hypnosis. She felt the hands on her back – then, in the Triangle, felt two hands plant themselves squarely and push and screamed again, this time in both places as she tumbled overboard in one, towards the clutches of the open water and lurched forward in the other, gripped by firm comforting hands that dragged her against him and murmured senseless words in her ear. Still there...she squeezed her eyes shut just as she had at the moment of impact with the water, and as it closed over her head she had opened them before looking upward to see the tunnel, inside which she now travelled. Dry, cold and tumbling mercilessly out of control towards a destination that had no meaning.

Then became now as after an interminable amount of time in the spinning, disorientating darkness she arrived here, in Atlantis. Held tight in the arms of a man who know both everything and nothing.

Kate's voice bit sharply into the void. "I'm bringing her out now Colonel. Rodney? You have your answers. You'll have to make sense of the information she gave you, I can't risk leaving her in there any longer. Colonel? Keep a tight hold of her... her emotions will be overloaded." She received a curt nod from John and didn't wait for Rodney's response. She brought her out, Kate watching her face closely for signs that she was overly traumatised and finding confusion to be the prevailing emotion.

Nicole shook her head slightly as though to push away cobwebs and John continued to hold tightly to her until he felt her hands push slightly against his chest. Allowing her to push him away, he reluctantly allowed her to stand back and put some distance between them so that she could gather her thoughts, and he remained on alert and ready to grab her at a moments notice should she prove unsteady on her feet.

Her voice was shaky and she reached up a trembling hand to run through the slightly tangled curls.

"Damn it! I was pushed, deliberately pushed – into that dark tunnel. Wormhole? Someone on board that boat knew that it was there, knew what it was and wanted me there... here?" Dragging her hand through her long curls again, she grimaced slightly as her fingers became caught in the tangled ends, pulling painfully. John brought a hand to her face, grasping her chin slightly to bring her eyeline back up to his.

"Nicole, it's important. You need to think, really think. Tell me the names of the people who were on board that boat. One of them knows of the stargate programme and possibly a third operational gate based on earth and yes... it would seem that they wanted you here for some reason. Wanted you to find the truth. Friend, Nicole. Not foe."

He kept his touch at her face as he watched her eyes widen and flicked a glance down to Rodney who was busy inputting data into his laptop.

Her voice was still shaky. "Oh my God John – you mean military?"

"Not necessarily Nicole. There are independent contractors on earth who have knowledge of the stargate, but who are supposedly sworn to secrecy. National security. But if they disagreed with what the stargate programme stood for, what better way to expose it? Find a way to send a reporter there."

The implication that she had been chosen for a task of that magnitude caused her to tilt slightly and she felt a wave of dizziness wash over her. John grasped her arms firmly and tried to lower her back down onto the couch but she resisted. "So where does that leave me John? Given that this knowledge will be passed on to your headquarters on earth... They'll never let me return to earth, but how can they let me stay here?"

His voice was deliberately brusque, attempting to pull her out of her panic. "Quite a conundrum unfortunately. But firstly? I need all those names and then I'll turn that information over to the SGC, let them investigate that end of it and find that gate that you came through. Your job? It's likely they have a way to keep tabs on you to make sure you're doing what they sent you here to do."

"A spy? Here in Atlantis?" Kate interupted, looking from John to Nicole.

"It would appear likely Kate, and perhaps we just need to sit back and wait for them to make contact. Nicole, I'm thinking that they'll approach you with a way to get your pictures out of Atlantis." John's eyes had narrowed as the full implication of what was taking place began to set in. She had been chosen to expose the stargate programme. And she was damned if she did, and damned if she didn't.

Nicole's voice was quiet. "But... if they're watching me, they'll know I've given you this information, know that you're onto them."

"A chance we'll have to take Nicole. This information will stay in this room and will be passed back to the SGC via Sam only. We trust no one else, apart from the members of my team. I know that Ronon and Teyla are above reproach. Everyone else? As far as they're concerned, you still have no idea how you got here and we'll keep it that way until we get to the bottom of this." He began guiding her toward the door. "Go grab your cameras... you've got some pictures to take."


	10. Chapter 10 Laying a false trail

CHAPTER 10 – LAYING A FALSE TRAIL

The trip back to her quarters was both quiet and unnerving. She found herself unconsciously watching everyone they passed, flicking her eyes over their sometimes too interested expressions, her own eyes sliding away before they could make contact. As most people appeared to show her more than just a reasonable amount of curiousity, the more she surreptitiously watched people, the more suspicious everyone began to seem and soon she was ducking her head to avoid eye contact. John at her elbow, knew immediately what was going through her mind and leaned in close to whisper at her.

"Don't think too hard about every person who passes by you or you'll do your head in. Just focus on letting us do our jobs. We'll track the person down, but we can only do that if you act as natural as possible. All those looks you're getting? Your new on base, and that always generates a certain amount of interest... and more to the point? You're hot. So... the guys are gonna stare. We're pretty much the same out here as the ones you find on earth... basic instinct and all that!" His quiet voice murmured in her ear and she felt the warmth of his nearness, comforting and helping to ease some of the anxiety she was feeling. Managing to huff out a slight laugh at his comments, she raised her eyes and looked the next person in the eye and did see the frank interest registered there.

_John's right, _she thought, _they're just looking me over... nothing sinister._ And even managed to wink back at one who stared a little too long at her, causing him to blush slightly and John to huff out a laugh.

"Ok Nicole, before you get all these poor lads heated up too much... let's grab your camera. I've got an offworld mission this afternoon. We're talking a small team, science personnel. A simple pilot and babysit job while they collect plant samples. I'll take you with me and you can get your photos and we'll let whoever is watching think that we're allowing you access to things that civilians would not normally have access to without appropriate clearance."

They had arrived at her quarters and John, keeping his touch light, leaned in to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear and said quietly so that only she could hear. "We could give them something else to thing about...?" His voice was teasing and brought a small smile to her face as he knew it would. He followed her into the room, thinking that it would be best if she were kept under security at all times. Suddenly this thought became paramount.

"Actually, all jesting aside, I don't want you alone at any time while you are here. If I post a guard outside your door it won't look strange. If anyone is watching it'll simply appear as if you are under guard until we can arrange to have something done with you."

Nicole laughed outright at this. "Kinda contradicts what you just said, John. Special security clearance to go offworld, but kept under guard on base?"

"We control what you see by letting you offworld on approved missions only, but don't allow you full access to the base without an escort. Not so unusual and it is up to us to make it appear convincing."

She had grabbed her camera and bag and turning suddenly, found herself face to face with him. Suddenly closer than she felt comfortable with. Before she could take a step back he had placed a hand gently at her waist and pulled her closer, allowing her to drop her head against his chest for some much needed comfort. She felt, rather than heard him laugh.

"You know that we could get around the whole guard thing, don't you... come and stay with me in my room..." His voice was teasing and she felt his breath tingle slightly against the top of her head.

"Yeah John, nice try. I'll take the guard... comes with less strings, I think..."

"Ouch..." He laughed again and let her pull away and move toward the door.

John had Sam run discreet checks on the two man science team he was taking offworld. They were going to P1S248, uninhabited but abundant in plant life and John was both pilot and security for the trip. They had been to the planet before and found no sign of indigenous dangerous wildlife or any other trouble and had made the decision not to involve the rest of his team on this one. He had also spoken to Sam about what had come out in the hynotherapy session, reinforcing what Rodney had already discussed with her and had found our that Sam had relayed the information back to General O'Neill at the SGC, along with the news that Nicole possessed the ATA gene. The General would begin discreet enquiries on earth and Sam had been given the go ahead to allow her to work undercover in Atlantis until they were able to track down the person or group who was behind the other gate on earth. It was also agreed that Nicole was likely safer in Atlantis.

John had taken Nicole to the gear room and organised a tactical vest for her, explaining the importance of protocol when offworld. Once he had shrugged himself into his own vest and attached his weapons, he had stood in front of her, long fingers expertly fastening the tabs to her vest, pulling them in securely so that she had to huff out a sharp breath.

Her voice had come out jerkily and she had reached out a hand to lightly finger one of the weapons that was clipped to his own vest. "So... these need to be tight, huh?" Her voice held a thread of amusement and he had slanted his eyes down to hers, his own crinkling a little at the note of laughter in her voice.

"You'll get use to the tightness, and these little vests have saved our lives more than once. So, yeah... they need to fit well.." His eyes then flicked down to where her hand rested against the weapon. "P90 – if you stay, you'll need to learn to fire one of these. We use some earth military weapons, but also have access to alien technology that is mind blowing until you get used to it. Let's get to the jumper bay and check in with the science team. And no... you're not flying!" He had stepped away from her and was in the process of walking out of the gear room when he heard her soft laughter behind him. _Oh yeah, he was getting kinda used to having her around._

The two man team that awaited them in the jumper bay were biologists who had been working with Dr Carson Beckett to isolate the variuos plants containing suitable medicinal qualities to create new vaccines as part of his ongoing research. They had both come up clear on Sam's discreet check and with that information carefully stored away by John, he had shown Nicole to the second seat, while the scientists had settled into the two rear seats, their gear carefully stowed away in the cargo area at the back of the jumper.

As John completed a quick check of the craft and took it gracefully up and into the Lantien sky, he flicked his glance sideways at Nicole, glad of the company and found himself almost compelled to watch the pleasure that crossed her face as they cleared the atmosphere and headed into space.

"Feel like talking, Nicole? Kinda lonely out here. No radio, and all that..." His voice was dry and she laughed and turned her slightly in her seat so that she was facing him.

"Ok John, I'll bite. Tell me how you got into this..." Her eyes were bright with humour, and he found it easy to fall under the simple spell she appeared to weave as interest sparked in her eyes.

"I'm guessing that men fall all over themselves to tell you their life story..." His eyes flicked back to the vista of space in front of him and she noticed the smile that played around his lips as he took a breath and proceeded to explain how he had been recruited and how he had decided his fate by the flip of a coin. She had laughed at that, not surprised.

"Funny...I don't know you, just surface impressions and not even sure that those accurately reflect the man that you really are. But somehow? That action seems appropriate coming from you. All this at the flip of a coin... you obviously had no girlfriend to consider?"

Another laugh and again that crinkling of the eyes that caused a not so small fissure of warmth to slide through her. "Real subtle Nicole... no, there was no girlfriend to consider. And none really out here either... in case you were wondering? And you. Nicole? I know that finding the perfect picture is what drives you, but boyfriend? Husband? Who do you go home to at night...?"

A look of pain crossed her face and he filed that away after immediately regretting asking the question. "Not any more. Long story and not one I feel like bringing back into the light at the moment... finding that perfect picture and uncovering truths are about the only things that drive me these days. And I'm fine with that..." She twisted her hands together in her lap and his eyes were drawn toward the movement and wondered who had hurt her and felt that testosterone driven need to slam his fist into the sad bastard who had done it.

They kept the conversation light for the remainder of the flight and when he announced to the scientists that they would be landing soon, she stretched her back and neck, disliking long periods of inactivity. They landed on the lush surface of the planet having found a flat space to land and Nicole leapt up eagerly, anxious to be on the move. As protocol decreed, she allowed John to scan the terrain first to make sure that they were the only life signs in the vicinity and when he gave them the go ahead, she was the first one to step down gracefully onto alien soil, looking around her with open curiousity and already bringing her camera up to begin taking photos. John glanced at her with amusement. She was already lost in her own private world behind her lens and he knew at this point, that he was simply a distraction that would barely register in this small world that existed for one person only.


	11. Chapter 11 A Camera not a weapon

CHAPTER 11 – A CAMERA NOT A WEAPON

John led the scientists to the area where they needed to be to collect their samples and found himself automatically scanning the area again to make sure that they were alone. A tiny, very subtle spike of unease had begun to creep it's insistent finger down his spine. Not enough to cause his extremely sensitive 'spidey senses' to kick in, but enough that he remained more vigilante than usual, aware that he had not only his science team to look after, but a photographer as well – a woman who had begun to insert herself rather firmly under his somewhat jaded and hardened skin. And he was not sure that he was entirely comfortable with the ease with which she appeared to do it.

Nicole changed to a macro lens to get close up shots of some of the plant foliage, the indigenous insects and some particularly stunning flowers that grew at the edge of the clearing in which the scientists were working. They were a deep tangerine in colour, ringed in purple with black centres and similarly shaped to a tulip, but not as closed. They emitted a sweet, almost overpowering scent that left her feeling a little light headed and it was only after dropping down to one knee on the ground to get the close shots with her macro lens that she heard one of the biologists call out to her not to handle any of the plants without gloves, particularly the untested ones. John's ears had sharpened when he heard the scientist call out, and his eyes automatically tracked Nicole's actions.

"Nicole?" he called across the clearing to her, eyes narrowing when he saw her down on one knee, close to one of the beautifully coloured flowers. "You didn't touch anything, did you? Sort of an unwritten rule out here. If you don't have prior approval, don't touch, , drink, taste or sample in any way or form. Got that?" His expression had hardened as he waited for her reply and he began to close the distance from where he stood keeping watch.

"Does that include smell?" Her voice sounded far away to her own ears and seemed to go in and out of clarity. She sat back on her foot, feeling a slight dizziness and brought her camera down, blinking rapidly. She watched as John's face swam in and out of focus like a lens that needed adjusting and no longer held sharpness. She saw him moving across the clearing towards her as if in slow motion and shook her head to clear the fogginess from it, her camera dropping down to her side, falling hard against her leg. Her axis seemed to tilt and her body listed sideways just as John reached her side and he reached out to grip her arm tightly.

"Damn it! Did you touch anything?" Not waiting for an answer, he looked anxiously toward the scientists. "Peter? Michael?". They were across the clearing busily collecting samples and oblivious to what was happening.

Michael raised his head and replied. "What's up Colonel?" He straightened from his task and began to move across the clearing towards them while Peter remained focused on his task.

"This plant? Any testing been done on it yet?" John indicated the brightly coloured flower, his eyes flicking sideways to Nicole and Michael shifted his attention from John to the flowers, looking down at them thoughtfully before transferring his attention to Nicole. John had her in a secure grip and the biologist noticed the unfocused look and the listless way she held her camera. He moved forward, alarm registering in his eyes and placed a hand on her brow finding it cool to the touch and shrugged his shoulders at John.

"I'm no medical doctor, but there appears to be no fever. By outwards appearances it would seem that she is suffering from some sort of hallucinory effect. Narcotic symptons maybe?" He knelt down beside the plant, taking care not to inhale too deeply and took a small sample before indicating that they should distance themselves until they knew what properties the plant contained.

Nicole watched the proceedings as though she was a third party observer. She watched Michael take the samples, felt John's hand tightly clamping her arm, then suddenly felt the overwhelming urge to simply get away. She pulled her arm sharply out of his grip and forced her legs to move, fast – then faster, hearing the sound of swearing then movement behind her. She didn't know where she was going, had no concept of direction or distance, just the overwhelming urge to simply get away. She barely registered the bushes and leaves that slapped at her face and carelessly disregarded the fact that these may have contagions or other debilitating properties, both blatently and unwittingly ignoring the rule of 'do not touch' out there in that alien landscape. At some point her feet became entangled but she righted herself before she fell and pushed on faster. Then the sensation of falling through nothing, as darkness enclosed her.

John was momentarily frozen when she broke free and it cost him several precious seconds before he was able to mutter an oath and send the appropriate response to his legs to begin the chase. The crashing of bushes and branches alerted him as to the direction she had taken and he instantly registered the speed with which she appeared to be moving away from him. He threw a hurried command behind him. "Peter, Michael – need some help here! Head her off – she's gone in that direction... We need to stop her before she hurts herself!"

Peter had looked up startled as John called out and spying his teammate about to move off in the opposite direction to the one that Nicole had taken, he put down his collection containers he had been holding and quickly followed.

John easily followed the path through the bushes. Even without his excellent tracking skills, he would have been unable to miss the trail of broken bushes and the flattened undergrowth. Stealth was obviously not on her agenda. It appeared that simply fright and flight had been the only thing driving her and wondered briefly, at the demons that infilitrated her mind now, making her see something that was simply not really there. He thought he heard her cry out but the sound was slightly distorted and seemed to come from a long distance away. A portion of his mind took in the fact that there appeared to be a new quality in the air. It seemed much damper and with that came the realisation that a heavy mist had begun to infiltrate the previous still and clear air, seemingly coming out of nowhere and settled down, pushing towards the ground from the tops of the trees, beginning to enclose them in an eerie veil of white.

"Peter! Michael!" John called out urgently to the scientists in an attempt to get a lock on the direction they had taken and heaved a sigh of relief when they called out in response from his immediate left. He heard no sound from Nicole and the noise of movement through the bush had ceased after he had heard her cry out. His own movements had become more cautious and less hurried as he continued, his visibility reduced almost to none with the enclosing heavy mist of white that had settled so completely over everything. He felt the ground move slightly beneath his feet and catching himself sharply just as the two scientists moved into his line of vision from the left side, having circled back around at the sound of his voice. He peered down through the swirling white, amazed at how fast the mist had come down and saw the deep black hole that he teetered on the edge of, and motioning wildly with his hands, he indicated to the scientists that they should stay back until he had time to investigate the circumference of the hole.

He called down into it, squatting down carefully at the edge and cupping his hands around his mouth. "Nicole! Hey, Nic... are you down there? Make a sound, anything... let us know that you're ok..." He waited a full sixty seconds for a response and when none came, he tried again.

"Nic?" Silence, then a far away groan rose up to meet him and he immediately drew himself up from his squatting position and walked carefully around the hole, stopping every few feet to call down again, attempting to get an accurate bearing on where she had fallen in.

Another groan sounded, still reasonably faint and far away and he tried to think quickly, knowing that she had likely slipped and falled down into the hole and while he knew at least that she was alive, it was inevitable that she was hurt and would require assistance to get herself out of the hole. He mentally catalogued the equipment that he had in the jumper, skimming over the ropes and other likely equipment that he would need, and called back to the scientists.

"Peter, Michael. I need some climbing equipment out of the jumper. I think she's down there and likely injured. You two wait here – keep talking to her while I double back and get the equipment I need to get down there. Ok?"

Michael grabbed at his arm as John moved past him, heading back to the jumper, peering half blind into the swirling white. "Colonel, I've had climbing experience. You want me to go down there?"

John's response was immediate. "If you've got climbing experience, then I want you up here manning the ropes. I take the risks around here, I'm responsible for the lives of the people I take out on these missions. This one's on me." His voice was terse and Michael's hand dropped quickly away as John continued past him, pushing himself into a run and arriving at the jumper breathless and a little disorientated by the thickening mist. He slipped into the back of the jumper, quickly gathering the equipment that he needed, tossing the coiled rope over his shoulder, and retracing his steps as fast as he was able to.

He heard Michael calling down to Nicole, and used the sound of Michael's voice to help guide him back to the exact spot and scanning the area as best as he was able given the reduced visibility, managed to locate a sturdy tree and secured one end of the rope, bringing the still coiled end back to where the two men waited, peering anxiously down into the dark hole.

"Nic? You ok down there? Come on sweetheart, give me some sort of sign...I'm coming down to get you out." He waited a moment but there was no response, so taking a deep breath and mentally crossing his fingers, he tested the security of the rope after securing it around himself and stepped over the edge after checking to see that Peter and Michael were standing by to assist.

The hole was much deeper than he thought. It took him a good 30 seconds to reach the bottom and an unwelcome thought flickered through his mind, skating around the fact that if she had fallen this distance, then she was likely hurt, and hurt badly. Once he hit the bottom, he gave a tug on the rope to let them know that he was down and pulled a flashlight out of a pocket on his vest, shining it around the dim interior of the hole experimentally. He did not see her immediately, but a small groan from his left had him pushing away from the wall quickly and moving in that direction.

"Nic?" His voice echoed slightly in that damp chamber and a shiver moved involuntarily down his spine. His flashlight beam spiked through the gloom and picked up a small bundle ahead, catching the barest movement.

"Damn it Nicole!" Angry at both her and himself, he dropped down beside her and ran a gentle hand up her back and down her legs, testing for obvious breaks. Finding none, he turned her over, eliciting a cry of pain and watched with narrowed eyes as she attempted to clutch ineffectually at her shoulder.

"Ok, not so bad. Dislocated shoulder." His long fingers probed gently as he muttered to himself, carefully easing them around the swollen joint, knowing that she was going to hate him like hell in just a minute, but unable to get her moving until he had put the joint back into place, a task he had performed previously on a team mate in Afghanistan. He had not however, tested out his expertise on the much smaller build of a woman. "This is gonna hurt sweetheart... I'll put that out there right now. But I need to do it, ok?"

Carefully, he eased in behind her and using his deft fingers to locate the socket and the joint, he made the movement sharp and as accurate as he could and closed his eyes briefly as she screamed in pain, then became mercifally silent as she slipped out of consciousness.

"Colonel? What was that? Are you ok down there?" One of the scientists, John wasn't sure which one, called down urgently. John was slow to answer.

"Yeah, we're good... but someone's gonna hate me when she wakes up. I'm securing the rope around her now." He gave a sharp tug on the rope and guided Nicole into position as the rope tightened. Between them they got her to the top and John was beside her as quickly as he could, undoing the rope and glancing around a little uneasily at the thickening mist. It was becoming difficult to breathe and Peter, punching a sample of the air into his hand held computer, found that there was now a higher concentration of oxygen, making the air exceptionally rich and making it harder to function with these levels.

Peter raised his eyes to John's and the Colonel took a step back at the fear he saw there. "Colonel... there's something about this mist. Something not right. I'm a scientist... but if I was a betting man? I would go so far as to say that this mist was... alive."

And a sickening feeling of fear found it's way into John's stomach and those spidey senses? They were scittering with rapid descent from the top of his head, moving downward. They were about to be mired in the proverbial crap, of that he had no doubt.


	12. Chapter 12 From out of the mist

CHAPTER 12 – FROM OUT OF THE MIST

She was still unconscious when he fumbled with the ropes, removing them from around her and lifting her carefully into his arms. The scientist's words echoed through his head and he gave himself a mental shake, trying to dispell the overwhelming thought that he had nailed it on the head. The mist did seem to have lifelike properties and John could also feel the long, damp fingers as they wound uneasily over him and felt a mild sense of suffocation as he fought to take deep, even breaths.

"We gotta get back to the jumper – now. I'm getting some really creepy feelings here and the longer we stand around here and let this stuff close over us, the wierder I am feeling. If that's not technical enough for you, tough! I'm calling it as I see it. Let's get the hell out of here!"

He felt, rather than saw the scientists ease in closer beside him and knew that they were picking up the same uneasy vibes that he was. Unexplained. He had been on enough alien planets to know that there were things out there that defied the normal laws of humanity, because hell – most of what they came across was simply not human.

He heard the rasp of his own breath echoing through the damp air and pushed through the undergrowth, feeling the tug of branches and leaves. A trickle of damp moisture ran down his neck and he had the overwhelming urge to reach back and brush it away. It felt both cold and oily, and he forced himself to push away the panic that was threatening to reach out and embrace him.

"Peter? Can you get another reading on that stuff that's around us. Mist, whatever... it is." His breathing was becoming slightly laboured. Nicole was only a slight woman, but with the increased oxygen in the air, it was becoming harder to breathe and as he spoke, he felt the tangible texture of the air seep into his mouth, threatening to choke him. He stopped momentarily, so that Peter could perform his task, and he could lift Nicole more securely into his arms.

Peter's voice was more than just a little alarmed. "Colonel? This reading is off the scale. The oxygen levels haven't changed since the last reading, but there are new properties in the air and I can't identify them. Neither can my database. It would appear that the ancients have not encountered this particular quality before or they would have programmed something into the database." He punched more buttons and glanced around him in trepidation. "Can you feel it Colonel? Can you hear it?" One of his arms starting swatting at something in the air around him and John turned sharply, trying to see what it was that he was seeing.

"Peter! What is it, man? I can't see anything...! Damn it!"

"Colonel! There, in front of you – holy crap, it's huge! Can't you see it? It looks like some sort of... werewolf. The eyes, they're glowing... oh my god... run Colonel. Michael – run...!"

Peter dropped his hand held computer and stumbled slightly.

"Michael! Grab him now. Damn it Peter, there's nothing there. You're hallucinating. Remember Nicole and the way she suddenly took off? We're all seeing things that aren't there. Come on man, fight it..."

John saw Michael reach out and attempt to restrain the other scientist and breathed a sigh of relief. He forced himself to breathe evenly, told himself that there was nothing out there - that the feeling of something alive sliding down his neck and under his shirt was all imaginary and gave a shiver.

"Michael – hold him secure. I'm going to try and get Nicole back to the jumper then I'll come back and get the two of you. If you think you see something out there, push it away. Mentally. There is nothing out there. Just mist. Not alive. I think there is a hallucinary property in the mist, the same as in the flowers that Nicole was photographing. Got that?"

John saw brief movement beside him and knew that Michael was attempting to nod his head.

"Good man. Remember – there is nothing there. Trust me."

"For god's sake, hurry back Colonel. I hear what you're saying, but this is scaring the crap out of me. Bravery is not a part of our job description... not what I signed up for, either!" John gave a small bark of laughter at the unexpected humour from the scientist, and resolved to spend the time getting to know him a little better when they finally got back to Atlantis.

"I'll do my best Michael. Keep him secure. Don't try and get back to the jumper, you'll likely get yourself turned around in this mist and that will make my job harder trying to find you. Sit tight and wait for me."

Not waiting for a response, John tucked Nicole more tightly into his arms and headed in the direction he believed the jumper to be, hoping that he was not being led around in circles. Whispers came out of the mist as he walked, voices that did not speak but made unintelligible sounds and his ears strained to hear what the whispers said. When a loud hissing noise burst out of the mist beside him, he stumbled, dropping to his knees and placing Nicole on the ground, resting his body protectively over hers and closed his eyes. He waited a full minute before opening them and peering off to the left where the hissing noise had come from. He saw movement. A dark shape that shifted and swirled within the mist, taking substance and form, then changing until all he saw was gray smoke.

"Damn it to hell. I know you're not real. I know there's nothing out there. Try and trick me – I dare you! Give it all you've got, and I'll grab you by the balls and wring you out like a wet tshirt." His voice echoed loudly around him and he thought he heard the sound of Michael's voice behind him, but ignoring everything around him and trusting nothing, including his normally impeccable senses, he picked Nicole back up and moved forward, feeling the pull of something cold that immediately wrapped itself around his leg.

Kicking out and muttering a loud curse he laughed briefly as a pained cry was heard from the place where he had aimed his kick.

"Real or not? Eh? I can still hurt your imaginary form. So come and get me."

Keeping his eyes front and centre he surged forward, not sure whether it was simply bushes or something more sinister that pulled insistently at his clothes and was at last rewarded with the dark shape of the jumper looming out of the mist in front of him. Not until he was standing close enough to reach out a foot and kick it's solid form, did he breathe out a sigh of relief and move around to the back, stepping into the open cargo door and into the interior. He quickly closed the door behind him, shutting out the swirling tendrils of mist, and moved through to the front of the jumper so that he could put Nicole gently down onto the floor, covering her with a warm blanket that he had picked up on the way through, shrugging off his tactical vest so that he could remove his jacket, wadding it up to use as a pillow which he carefully placed under her head. Patting her cheek gently, he attempted to wake her.

"Nicole... come on honey, wake up. I need to leave you for a few minutes..." He saw her eyes flutter slightly and as they opened, saw also the instant spark of pain that registered there.

"Nicole... hey. I've brought you back to the jumper – you fell down a hole and had a dislocated shoulder, which I managed to set for you. Hence the pain... Long story babe, but there is some of narcotic quality in the mist that's causing us to see and feel all sorts of things that aren't there. I left Michael and Peter a little way back, they're having a little trouble and I'll have to go back and help them. You with me?"

He peered down at her, watching as comprehension came into her eyes. "John... crap. I hurt."

"I know sweetheart, but the alternative was worse, believe me. You ok here for a few minutes while I go and help the others?"

Nicole struggled to sit up, but he gently pushed down on her good shoulder, trying to keep her on the floor of the jumper.

"Don't move around. At least until Carson can take a look at the shoulder – or you'll do more damage to it – you might have some sort of head injury as well, so best you stay still. Ok?"

"Jesus, John... let me come with you. I saw something out there also... before I fell into the hole. Something grabbed me, pulled me down. What if it followed us in here?" One of her hands reached up and grabbed for his shirt, pulling him back down toward her. He reached out his other hand, closing if over her one in an attempt to calm her.

"Listen to me Nicole. There IS nothing out there. You have to trust me on that one. The flowers that you were photographing released some sort of narcotic property into the air and that same property is present in the mist that has been swirling around out there. I'm willing to stake my life on that fact. There is nothing there. I can't take you with me – the other two are also fighting the effects of the hallucinations, and as soon as you get out there, you'll be in trouble again. I'm barely keeping my own head above water..."

He watched her carefully, noting the fear that blossomed in her eyes and wanted nothing more than to stay and reassure her. But he had others to look out for, and they had been out there alone long enough. He kept his voice firm. "You need to stay here... no argument, and I need to go now. You'll be safe in here if you just stay calm until I get back."

Not waiting for her response, knowing that the longer he stayed, the harder it would be to leave her – he turned and went to the back of the jumper, throwing a last look over his shoulder as he opened the rear jumper door. He ran out into the mist, but not before taking a long deep breath as though he was about to submerge himself under water.

A cry rang out in the mist and he increased his speed, aiming himself in the direction of the sound.

"Michael? Peter! I'm on my way back to get you. You guys ok?"

It was Michael who answered and John took a relieved breath. "Colonel, we're over here. Hurry. I can't hold Peter down much longer. He keeps moaning about something that is trying to grab him and I'm not so sure he's wrong. I'm seeing it too, Colonel. It's huge, and I think it is near... please, hurry."

John heard real fear in his voice and called out to reassure him. "Michael... there's nothing there. Trust me on that, please. Shut your eyes if you have to, think of something else, something from earth. Block your ears, whatever it takes. You and Peter are the only ones there right now. We've checked for life signs when we arrived and the whole planet was scanned the first time we were here. We're alone."

John moved through the mist, and saw the outline of the two men who sat huddled near the ground. He was at their side quickly, and reached down to secure Peter's arm so that Michael could stand, watching as the scientist ran a hand over his eyes. John placed a hand on his shoulder, aimed him in the direction of the jumper and urging Peter along he sought to ignore the constant feeling of being tracked by something unknown in that eerie mist.

When at last he had his charges back at the jumper, he breathed a sigh of relief when he could finally close the jumper bay door, point the scientists in the direction of the rear seats and hurry forward to where Nicole had pushed herself upright on the floor, clutching her injured shoulder. He saw the look of relief in her eyes when they entered the front of the jumper, and he crouched down in front of her, reaching out a hand to gently cup her chin.

"Hey, you ok? I'll help you into the second seat if you're up for it, and we'll get the hell out of dodge. I'm thinking we've all had enough of this place... here..." He reached around and grabbed the camera he had managed to retrieve from the clearing before heading back to the jumper to grab the climbing gear, and passed it to her. He waited beside her while she fired it up, curiousity blooming in him as he saw the startled look come into her eyes.

"John..." Her voice was soft and she turned the camera so that he could look into the viewfinder and see what had brought the look into her eyes. The brilliantly shaded flower took up most of the viewfinder, resplendent colours beautifully portrayed by the photographer. But it was the dark shadow that took up one corner of the photo that had him peering closer. Wanting to see what the camera had tried to capture. A face... eyes...a dark shape.

He flicked his own startled gaze to hers. _Can one's imagination be captured in a photo?_ He thought to himself, not wanting to voice aloud the thought, he struggled to push it away.

"That could be anything, Nicole... a mark on the lens, trick of light... any number of explanations." He gave his shoulders a slight shrug, wanting to appear casual. All the while his mind was working quickly, processing, formulating and putting pieces together. And his eyes were drawn involuntarily to the front window of the jumper and he saw the dark shape within the mist. Not a hallucination. Not his imagination. He stood quickly, attempting to busy himself with the consoles of the jumper, checking to see that Nicole was secure and taking her focus away from what he had seen.

"Let's get back to Atlantis, get that shoulder looked at and have Carson give you a full check over. Definitely in need of some downtime... oh yeah..." He muttered these last words, feeling her puzzled gaze on him and kept his own focus on flying the jumper. And knew they'd likely have to come back and find out what really kept it's face hidden in the mist.


	13. Chapter 13 News from the SGC

CHAPTER 13 – NEWS FROM THE SGC

He delivered his slightly damaged cargo to the infirmary. The scientists had been quiet throughout the journey and John knew that they were attempting to process what had happened to them. It would be up to him to write the report on this one, and he had no idea what he was going to say. Real or imagined? Tangible or intangible? Those were the questions he had asked himself repeatedly on the trip back to Atlantis and he had kept his own thoughts close to his chest, not wanting to voice aloud what he was really thinking. There had been something in that mist. His spidey senses had been in overdrive and they did not react to something that was not real. It just did not happen. If he could not trust those senses, then damn... just what could he trust?

"Nice job with the shoulder Colonel. Really, lad. I couldn't have done better myself. Nicole? You're lucky the Colonel was with you. A dislocated shoulder is no fun." Carson's warm eyes smiled down at her as he gently probed the shoulder joint, grimacing a little himself as she winced during a particular moment.

"Sorry, lass."

"It's ok Dr Beckett. Really. And getting said shoulder put back into place? No fun either..." her dry tone caused a chuckle to accompany the warm smile.

"Aye lass, that it isn't. Colonel? What did you run into out there? I've never seen my two assistants looking so pale. They're not saying much, but I'm thinking that you must have run into something that caused those two to turn down lunch. And coffee." Carson spoke only partly in jest. He was worried. Michael and Peter had said little about what they had encountered, simply handed over the samples and both had pleaded headaches and asked if they could retire to their private quarters.

"I'm thinking I need to give you and my scientists a good checkup Colonel... why don't you pop yourself on that bed over there. Just to be safe, eh lad?"

Carson's eyes had sharpened and John knew that it would do little good to protest. When the doctor got into his head an idea, and a point of action – there was little that anyone could do to put him off his stride. The kindly scotsman, chief medic for the base – took his role seriously. And he genuinely cared about all the men and women in Atlantis, the point in case making him a superb doctor. One who John trusted implicitly.

"There was something possibly narcotic out there doc, so yeah. A checkup would be on the agenda if you've got the time. Make sure you give your boys a good working over. By the way... they're ok, doc. Happy to take them out whenever they need to collect samples. Got some guts..."

"Guts, Colonel? Not exactly a technical term, but I'll let that slide. More to the point, I'm wondering just what they might have needed "guts" for?" Carson continued to run tests on his patient. Gently probing her head now, looking into her eyes for any sign of head trauma. He had found her left wrist to be extremely swollen and prepared to move the portable xray machine over to her bed to rule out whether the wrist may be broken or not.

"That report is mine to write doc, and I'm not quite sure yet what I intend to put in it... still need to process what it was we ran into out there. How's the patient? She gonna be ok?" John moved closer to the bed, ignoring for now, the doctors request that he take up residence in one of the other beds.

"Plenty of scrapes and bruising, which will cause a little pain in the next 24 hours. I'm going to keep her in for observation, to make sure that there is no concussion. I'll just check out this wrist. I suspect it's just sprained, albeit badly, but we need to make sure there is nothing broken in there. All in all, she is a healthy wee lass and it could have been a lot worse, given what you have told me about the incident."

A dry chuckle came from said patient. "You make me sound like some sort of prize filly...you're kinda cute Dr Beckett. The last stay I had in a hospital... ugghhh... put me off needles for life."

"Ah lass, sweet of you to say. I can't see anything broken in there... just a bad sprain. We'll strap the wrist and the shoulder just to keep everything secure so that the muscles can heal around the joint. And rest!" His stern voice was outweighed by the kindly twinkle in his eyes and she found herself smiling up at him.

"That's not gonna be a problem Dr Beckett. I feel like I could sleep for a week... it's been an... interesting few days and I'm thinking that my body is still trying to cope with the fact that it's been displaced into another galaxy..." Her eyelids began to droop as she spoke and Carson eased her down on the pillow, pulling up the blanket and turning to look at the Colonel who stood nearby. Something in John's eyes had his own narrowing. If he didn't know better, he would think that there were some serious feelings beginning to brew between the sometimes taciturn Colonel and this lovely lass from Earth. _Hmmm..._ thought Carson. _Interesting. I suspect Colonel Sheppard will have more than his hands full if he tries to take on this young lady. She won't take any of his crap and she'll likely give him back as good as he gives. Stay tuned for the next episode, eh?_

John's eyes narrowed as he caught the doctor's gaze. "Share the joke doc?" John ambled over to the other bed and lightly pulled himself up on it, content to let Carson give him the usual after mission going over.

"Not so much a joke, as a revelation son. And there's no need to share as I suspect you're already privy to that information..."

They were interupted by the arrival of Sam Carter and looking at the expression on her face, John mentally groaned. It would appear that the Colonel was not bringing good news.

"John! I've just had communication from General O'Neill. A rather unusual memo found it's way onto his desk an hour ago. Someone claiming to have knowledge of the stargate programme. Someone claiming to have visual proof – pictures. It has to be whoever was behind getting Nicole to Atlantis. How else would they have pictures? Too much of a coincidence and I suspect, their way of showing their hand. They want to expose the programme. And I think they intend to use Nicole to do it."

Sam flicked a glance back at the bed where the reporter lay. Following her glance, John saw that Nicole's eyes were closed against a pale face that showed evidence of some of the scrapes from her fall into the hole. He sighed, and brought his glance back to Sam, finding that she was looking at him intently, waiting for a reponse.

"Signed or anonymous?" John's question was uttered in a terse voice and he risked another glance at the woman who lay in the nearby bed, dragging a hand roughly through his hair as he brought his gaze back to Sam.

"Anonymous, John. But there were enough clues in there to let the General know that they were military. So, we're not dealing with some independent – we're looking at a rogue military group perhaps."

"Ah crap!" replied John. "That changes the playing field. That would mean there is more than likely someone watching her in Atlantis, hell – possibly more than one. We're gonna have to smoke them out Sam, set up a trap of some sort. We need to take them down, now. Before they do any further damage and before anyone gets hurt." Again, his eyes flicked to the woman in the bed.

"Ah John?"

Dragging his eyes back to Sam he saw the query in hers.

"What happened out there John? Or do I have to wait for the mission report?"

"I'm kinda hoping that we can use Nicole's photos for the report... I don't know that I want to try and put into words what it is we saw out there. That 'picture says a thousand words' thing? That would more or less work for me right now."

Sam attempted to stifle a smile, but her blue eyes held more than just a glint of humour. "So about that plan, John..."

"Give me a few hours Sam... I'll come up with something, and by all means... feel free to jump in any time if you happen to have a brain wave. Where's Rodney?"

"Ah John... that would by my second point. He's been working on some theories of his own and I'm sure you're dying to hear them. Go see him when you're done here."

She gave him a smile and made to leave, chuckling a little when she heard John's dry reply.

"Can't wait..."


	14. Chapter 14 Rodney's theory

CHAPTER 14 – RODNEY'S THEORY

"Colonel Sheppard! Just the man I need to see..."

Rodney's usual effusive mannerism ran itself up and down John's mental chalkboard like the proverbial fingernail, and he found himself wincing slightly as he entered Rodney's lab. Most times he was happy to spend time with the scientist, finding his sarcasm and unusual mannerisms a challenge, and one he rose to more than adequately on most occasions. But not today. Sometimes? Rodney could be a right royal pain in the ass. Bluntly put, you simply had to be 'in the mood' to be around him.

"Great, Rodney. And you're just the man I need to be around right now..."

Fortunately sarcasm often rode right over Rodney's head and today was no exception. Caught up in his own world of giant egolomania and in the possession of a brain capacity that much larger than everyone elses, mostly he was content with his own company and his own intellect. However, for some unknown reason, he tolerated John Sheppard, in fact might even go as far as liking the man.

"I've been working on a few theories. As to why and how Nicole came to be in Atlantis. Ok, so we know that she was pushed off that boat deliberately by someone who wanted her here. By someone who knew about the stargate programme and knowing she was a journalist, a photographer – wanted her here to do her job. Exposing something. Am I right so far?"

Waiting only briefly to see John nod, he rubbed his hands together.

"You can work on the who. I'm interested in the how. How did she get here? What sort of device brought her here? She arrived through our stargate, which would imply that she began her journey through a stargate. Relativity laws... what goes in, must come out. Works in reverse. What came out, must have gone in. With me so far?"

Not even waiting for John's nod, Rodney simply ploughed on in his usual dictatorial fashion, now on a verbal roll and really needing no audience.

"We know that there are only two gates on earth. The working gate at the SGC and the second gate in Antarctica. There are no other, and it is easy enough to track them. They provide an energy signature that is quite specific whenever they are activated, and I have run the energy spikes through my programme, and had them do the same thing at the SGC. No gate on earth was activated at the time that Nicole supposedly fell into that water. So? She did not enter through a gate of any kind. Not a traditional gate anyway."

He paused to take a deep breath and John could not resist the small smile that came to him. Rodney was a force of one.

"You no doubt have a theory that you're about to share with me Rodney? I'm guessing that is what you are leading up to..." John murmured this, settling himself down onto one of the chairs in Rodney's lab.

"Nice to know that you do have some faith in me, John. Yes. I do have a theory and if I do say so myself? It is the only logical one given the information that we have. The Bermuda Triangle is the key. And I think this might help you a little with the 'who'. She was sent there to do an assignment? I know she is a freelancer, but by her own admission, she was contracted to do this particular assignment. Find out who hired her, and that'll begin your trail to the 'who'. I've already told you about the general theories, supposed properties of the Triangle. Giant wormhole, energy vortex – over the years the list has grown and the theories have run from the downright bizare to the simply ridiculous. One however, has scientific properties that I can attribute merit to. Something along the lines of Stongehenge. A ley line or sorts or more scientifically – a vortice."

John put a hand up to interupt him. "Ley lines, Rodney? Come on... you're trying to tell me that some 'ley line' brought her here, somehow connected her to our stargate?"

"Ah John, how can you be so narrow minded. Vortices are high energy spots on the Earth. Earth energy is due to its electromagnetic field. NASA research has proved that the human energy field is tuned in to certain 'Earth Waves'. The joining on the surface of the Earth are 'hot spots' of energy focus which we know as the vortices of the Earth, these are linked by ley lines. A Ley line is simply an energy line, some being of more importance than others. Some of the major vortex areas on Earth are well documented and not be confused with ancient sites such as Stonehenge in the UK or the pyramids of Egypt and Yucatan, Mexico etc. These are known to be places of magnetic and spiritual power - not all necessarily vortices. Vortices are not necessarily of the same structure, size or disposition. They can be volcanoes, high mountains, hot springs, mineral deposits, beneath the ocean, deep gorges, rock outcroppings, and even in deserts like the Sinai and Namib."

Rodney's excitabilty factor was escalating up a notch or two and John felt the vague stirrings of a headache coming on. Rodney's brand of personality was certainly an acquired taste. He did not appear, however, to notice John's somewhat flagging enthusiasm, and continued with his diatribe.

Accompanied by gestures his voice was almost relentless.

"It has been stated by several sources, that crystals were directed during Atlantean times at balancing the ley lines of the Earth's plane, and maintaining stability of Earth. The Earth was moving on its axis with respect to the magnetic poles, just as it still does to this day. However, thousands of years ago it moved to a larger degree which some say contributed to the destruction of what was known as Atlantis. And while we now know a more factual story as to the supposed demise of Atlantis it is known that crystals were also important to maintain a balance between other planets in the Universe, because of the importance of the vibration of planet Earth in relation to the sun and moon."

Rodney paused briefly, his enthusiasm radiating out of him.

"Large vortices may appear like wheels with the spokes emanating from them being ley lines. Some of these spokes are more powerful than others, just as there seems to be different degrees of strength to the vortices. Energy may whirl through the spokes from the vortices, at different frequencies."

In spite of himself and his growing headache, John was fascinated. "So the Bermuda Triangle could be one of these vortices? But how would that connect with our stargate here?"

"Simple, yet not... Using the premise that it is an astromonical anomaly, someone had to have done their research and knew that at a given time with the configuration of the stars, then this particular vortice located supposedly over the Triangle would open. Remember John, one of the prevailing theories about Atlantis, is that it's disappearance was somehow connected to the Triangle. Ok, so never proven or disproven obviously, but what if, there is some credence to this theory. Something to do with the fact that when the vortice is open and receptive, then if you have the required ATA gene for example, there is a direct pathway from there – to here!"

Triumphant now, he gestured a little theatrically with his hands and John ran a hand over his eyes.

"If your theory is right Rodney, and right now – hell, it's the only one we have... that means that this whole thing has been carefully orchestrated. By someone who has been studying these theories for a long time, and by someone who knew that Nicole had the gene."

"The gene thing, John? Not so difficult really. Blood samples are held by many agencies for many things and it would have been an easy matter to get a sample of her blood to test for the gene. I suspect she was handpicked for the job some time ago and she has been carefully groomed by this particular group."

"I'd say that was a given Rodney... damn. This is gonna come as one almighty shock to her. Especially so given that she is a freelancer and so damn set on her constitutional rights. This one pretty much overwrites all freewill plus everything in between. She is going to be devastated. Man!"

He pushed himself out of his seat and paced around the room, coming to a halt in front of Rodney.

"You've spoken to Sam about this?"

"This morning, John. She agrees with me, said it seems a logical assumption given what little facts we have as to how she came here. I'll do some more checking, of course. There's a couple of people I want to touch base with back on Earth, discreetly of course, but if I'm right? And I have no reason to think that I'm not... this will be a huge find – scientifically. And as usual... guess what? I can't publish a damm thing..."

"Kinda sucks, huh Rodney?"

"Sarcasm, Colonel Sheppard. Not your best side."


	15. Chapter 15 More than her share of demons

CHAPTER 15 – MORE THAN HER SHARE OF DEMONS

When she woke up, confusion clouded her mind and she fought to grasp for clarity, feeling the invasion of pain from many parts of her body. Groaning, she moved her head to the side, squinting slightly against the light as first one eye, then the other was prised open. Bright lights overhead. A hospital? A handsome, dark haired man lounging negligently on the chair beside her bed, hazel eyes regarding her closely.

"Nicole? Welcome back... how's the body feeling?"

Clarity burst through the fog and she groaned again. Wormholes, stargates, monsters in the mist. And Colonel John Sheppard. Ah crap. What had been a very real nightmare just minutes ago, was in fact a very real waking dream. She was here. In Atlantis. In another galaxy. And the man sitting in the chair beside her bed? Damn... Those feelings were not welcome about now...

"The body, Colonel Sheppard? I'm not so sure it's actually still connected to me – if it wasn't for the fact that I can intensely feel every tiny scrape and bruise that no doubt adorns most parts of it... Ah damn... I feel about as good as I did when Ronon shot me with that stun gun. I'm thinking that being here, is not so good for my health..."

That dry chuckle brought a small smile to her lips. "Glad you find this amusing John. Really! And I can remember that little stunt you pulled on my shoulder down in that hole... My memory is just fine... next time you want to manhandle any of my joints, please get me medicated first, huh? That hurt like a bitch..."

"The alternative was far worse, believe me Nicole. And by the way. You're welcome..."

"Ungrateful much, huh?"

"Oh yeah, babe. That about covers it. But I get it. This whole deal... it's getting a bit much. And I've just had a nice little chat with both Sam Carter and Rodney McKay and guess what? You're in for a few more surprises..."

He pushed himself up from the chair and went and sat carefully on the edge of her bed, not wanting to jar her too much. His hand reached out and brushed a strand of hair out of her eyes, and he saw the instant flare in hers and smiled a little. _So the lovely lady was not immune afterall... perserverance Sheppard. She's had a few pages full of crap written into her life story. Get past those chapters and maybe she's ready to do a little rewrite. Some fights are worth the possible scarring afterwards... and my senses? They're saying that she's a keeper... go figure?_

He gave her a run through of what he had learnt that day from both Sam and Rodney and watched the dawning horror in her eyes. Saw the tense set of her muscles and the clenching of her jaw as her world as she knew it, was once again shattered. And hated himself for being the one to bring her the news.

"I'm sorry, Nicole. That had to be hard to hear and take in. Invasion of all sorts of privacy, and I'm guessing that you feel more than just a little diappointed in humanity in general. Welcome to our world sweetheart. Out here? We see the very best and the very worst of humanity and it still gets me every time. There is always someone worse, committing a crime that is somehow just a little more adhorrent than the last. We'll find out who's behind it all. We've got our eyes and ears in the right places and it's only a matter of time really. They'll make a mistake, they always do. And we'll get them. Trust me. But hey? There is something you can help us with once you're up and about... together. We'll go through your camera, the photos you have on your memory card. Or flashdrive. You might have something we can use, you may have inadvertently taken a photo of something we can use to track back to who is behind this. As soon as you're up to it?"

He paused, watching as a single tear tracked it's way down her face. "Hey..." Reaching out, he wiped the tear away and kept his hand at her face, gently resting on her cheek. When she leaned into his hand, he felt his heart clench slightly and he vowed then and there. He would protect her whatever the cost. And find a way to make her stay in Atlantis. With him.

The next morning Carson gave her the go ahead to leave the infirmary. Of course he was waiting for her. Just inside the infirmary door, waiting for Carson to give her one last check over before sending her on her way. She knew that he was there, felt his presence in such a way that almost had her reeling. That tangible feeling that he was close by. Protecting her. Narrowing her eyes slightly, she fixed her gaze on him as he pushed himself away from the wall against which he had been leaning and moved into the centre of the room to meet her.

"All clear to blow this joint?" The ever present humour in him had her smiling in return. Serious did not seem a constant factor in this man, and yet she took in the constant coiled state of his muscles, always ready to pounce, to attack, to protect. Should the need arise. Yeah, there was some serious there, but he kept it well hidden, pushed down where it played a constant battle with this man's need to keep things from getting too heavy. She had his measure, of that she was sure. But what she was not sure of... those feelings that constantly crept up and bit her on the proverbial ass whenever she got too close to him. Like now.

"Colonel Sheppard. My trusty escort I presume? You've drawn the short straw for security detail over the errant photographer who seems to have found her way by design, not by error, to this very top secret facility. Hmmm?"

"No short straw on this one Nicole. I held all the straws... you're mine to protect for the duration, and I won't trust anyone else with your life at this point in time. I don't think you're in danger if you do what they want you to do... but until we find out what their agenda is, and who they are? I'm not leaving your side while you wander our esteemed halls of Atlantis. Consider me your discreet shadow."

"Discreet, John? Not so much..." He glance slid sideways and travelled up his large frame, strongly muscled body, topped by oh so gorgeous face. Discretion.. not gonna work with this man.

She looked pale and the bruising on her skin stood out in stark relief. His protective senses now in full play, he took hold of her hand and guided her out of the infirmary, intent on taking her to the mess to get some food into her. Given everything that she had been through over the past few days since her arrival in Atlantis, he knew that food had not been high on her list of priorities and given her slight build, now somewhat slighter he noticed, since she had arrived - his first mission was to feed her.

The mess was awash in noise when they arrived. Mid morning, usually a quiet time in this part of the city as most personnel were already well into their shift. His team was there, seated at a table for six out on the balcony, and keeping a firm grip on her hand, he moved her through the mess and out into the welcome cooler air of the terraced area, nodding at Ronon and Teyla who were in the middle of a somewhat heated discussion. They both looked up as Nicole and John stopped at their table, and John noticed the angry lines on Teyla's face, and wondered if perhaps they shouldn't attempt to sit elsewhere so that whatever they were in the middle of, could be finished. Ronon's huge plate of food was still heaped and John knew from experience that the big Satedan went through an enormous amount of food at each meal, and usually in record time. This break from tradition was disconcerting, and John hesitated before sitting down.

"Sheppard. Nicole." Ronon's greeting was terse, but this in itself was not unusual. He was generally a man of few words.

"Hey Ronon, Teyla. What's up? I need your help later today and I need to brief you on what we have found out with regards Nicole and her arrival here. Some heavy stuff has been going down boys and girls, and guess what? Our new guest is right in the thick of it all... "

"Colonel Sheppard. Nicole. I am pleased to see that you are up and about. I heard about your mishap on the mission that you were on yesterday." Teyla's smile for Nicole was a genuine one however John noticed that it dimmed noticeably when she swung her gaze away from Nicole and back to Ronon.

"Hey you guys ok? You want us to leave you some space... to do... whatever..." John reached out to grab the back of a chair, pausing before pulling it out as he awaited Teyla's reply.

"Please join us John, Nicole. I am sorry if it appears you have interupted something. Ronon and I were simply having a ... discussion... that we have opposing views on." She smiled at him and indicated with her hand that he should sit down. Grinning now, he did so, but not before pulling out a seat for Nicole first and allowing her to sit. Ronon's raised eyebrows did not go unnoticed.

"What?" John's voice held a petulant note.

"Pulling out chairs for ladies? A little over the top Sheppard, even for you. What gives?"

"Shut it Ronon. Trying to make a good impression here, and you're tearing holes in my somewhat sketchy reputation as it is. Nicole? I'll go load up a plate. What can I get you?"

He noticed that her pale face had taken on a little colour with both the sea air and the spark of interest in her eyes as she followed the sparring match between the two friends. She smiled slightly as she glanced down at Ronon's plate, then back up into John's amused eyes.

"Ah... coffee would be good thanks... and a little of what he's having... the operative word being little..."

"Ronon's a tank Nic - really. The man is the proverbial eating machine. Not many of us here can keep up with his food intake... maybe with the exception of Rodney..."

"Did someone say my name?" John was jostled somewhat rudely as Rodney elbowed his way to a place at their table, laying dibs on the chair that John had secured for himself, smiling at Nicole as he began stuffing food into his mouth.

"Yeah, Rodney. Somehow Ronon makes it look cool... you? Not so much..."

Shaking his head, he turned and made his way into the mess, grabbing a couple of trays and began filling up some plates, unable to stop himself flicking glances out to the table on the balcony. Rodney continued his relentless pursuit of filling his forever empty stomach and he saw Nicole start up a conversation with Teyla. Smiling a little to himself, he headed back outside with full trays that included steaming cups of coffee and paused behind Nicole's chair, reaching over her shoulder to deposit her plate and cup in front of her. Pulling his hand back he lightly brushed her cheek, a seemingly casual gesture but he felt the heat of her cheek as he made contact and saw Ronon's eyes sharpen as he too registered both the action and the reaction. _Just staking my claim _thought John. _Yeah, so what - male testosterone or not... this one's mine, or at least, she will be. Just gotta convince her that I'm not the same guy who put that look of pain on her face. Gotta show her that I'm more...much more._

Their impromptu meeting moved to the conference room after they had finished eating. John wanted to fully brief his team on what had happened and he let Rodney take his favoured place - in front of the group in lecture mode. Much to Ronon's disgust and Teyla's amusement. Ronon had no understanding of what Rodney attempted to explain about ley lines and vortices however Teyla, who had a much more open mind and had experienced a more fantastical and whimsical approach to life was fascinated with his explanation and it was up to John to explain to Ronon in more simple terms, exactly what Rodney was trying to say.

John kept a close eye on Nicole. She was quiet, no doubt about it. Her naturally fiesty nature was not in the office today and he could almost visualise the 'out of office' sign that must have been hanging in prominent display in her brain. It appeared she had simply shut down and he needed to find a way to refire her fuse. She had eaten little at lunch, that fact had not escaped his notice and he felt the need to simply gather her into his arms and take her away somewhere. Where there were no ulterior motives, no hidden agendas, no covert operations... and just hold her.

_Reality check Sheppard. You are, for all intents and purposes, in the middle of a damn war zone. Hold her? And do what? Chase away her damn demons, give her some sort of false hope? Face it, you can't make her any sort of promises at the moment. Don't put out what you can't deliver. She needs a friend, support and she needs explanations... go for the easy and perhaps the hard? That'll come in time..._

"So... these vortice things?" Ronon slumped slightly in his seat, his dark gaze locking onto John's. "They work like a stargate, right?"

"More or less Ronon, and our mission now? Find out who the hell is behind this whole game of thrones, so to speak. I need your help guys. Nicole has a flashdrive full of photos, and the one's I'm interested in? Those taken while she was at the Triangle and immediately prior. She had contact with one or more of them, of that I have no doubt and we may be able to get a lock on them by going through her photos. I thought we'd set up a projections screen and hook a computer up to it so that we can get the photos up onto a large screen."

"You want me to go get my cameras John?" Nicole shifted in her seat, turning slightly so that she could look at him.

He paused a moment, then looked at Rodney. "Rodney, can you set it up in here for me? I've got security detail over our guest, so I'll take her back to her quarters to get what she needs. Sam may come down as well - I know you guys are unlikely to recognise any of the earth humans that appear in the photos, but the more eyes and brains on board, the better. Ok?"

He had their support and felt better for knowing that and allowing Nicole to move away from the table and towards the conference room door, he gave one last lot of instructions. "Ronon, one of the people in those photos may be here in Atlantis. If we can verify that, then I want you to go after them. I want him or her alive. That's my only stipulation. Copy that?"

He received a terse nod from Ronon, and placing himself as close to Nicole as he was able without bringing any unwanted attention their way, they quickly made their way back to her quarters and it was only after she closed the door behind her and sat down heavily on the bed, that John was able to see exactly how much a toll this was beginning to take on her.

'Hey..." he sat down beside her and the slight dip of the mattress had her body leaning slightly towards him and it was a natural thing to wrap an arm around her waist, mindful of her injured shoulder and arm, and pull her gently against his side. And it was just as natural for her to drop her head so that it rested on his shoulder, tucked up easily and comfortably against his neck, fitting against his body as though it was simply meant to be. He turned his head so that he could rub his face softly against her hair and closed his eyes as some almost unidentifiable emotion shot through him with alarming speed and accuracy. He felt the softness of her body and she leaned against him and the tingle of something almost electric as his thigh carelessly rubbed against hers and he squeezed his eyes shut tighter, wincing at the almost physical pain of holding himself back, keeping himself from doing the one natural thing that seemed to figure in his mind right now. Wrap her tight in his arms and kiss her to within an inch of her life. And more. Much more. Oh yeah.

She must have sensed his inner turmoil. And acknowledged to herself that the same feelings were coursing through her own veins and it was on this note that she pulled herself abruptly out of his embrace and launched herself toward the balcony door, moving straight to the railing and looking out over the Lantian sea, feeling the calming motion of the breeze that cooled her heated face and allowed the emotions that were roiling inside her, to settle. She heaved a deep breath and let it out in a shuddering gulp that had her leaning heavily against the railing as though her legs would no longer support her. John gave her a moment, watching the play of emotions across her face and seeing the tense set of her one good shoulder as she attempted to battle whatever was waging it's personal war inside her. Resolutely he pushed himself up off the bed and went to stand behind her. Not touching her.

"Let it go for now Nic... I'm not gonna do anything you don't want me to do. I"ll back off. I don't force myself on anyone..."

He reacted to the abject sadness on her face and couldn't help himself. Didn't even try. Just stepped forward and wrapped his arms around her and held her while she cried. Not sure why she cried exactly. Didn't really care but suspected it was more than what was happening here in Atlantis. A catalyst, the reason she sought solitary assignments and the reason she hurt so much inside. At that moment? She needed a friend. She needed him and nothing else mattered.

"I'm here baby, whatever you need me to be right now... nothing more. You'll tell me when it's time..." And he held her for a short while, saying nothing more, until the tears ran dry and she pushed at his comforting arm, distancing herself from the comfort she had not allowed herself to have for such a long time.


	16. Chapter 16 A clue in the photos

CHAPTER 16 – A CLUE IN THE PHOTOS

Hats off to his team. When they arrived back at the conference room with her camera, flashdrive and full memory card, Rodney had set up the screen as asked and they deliberately avoided staring too hard at her face, where the obvious signs of a melt down were showing. Teyla had simply laid a hand on her arm and tipped her face close to Nicole's murmuring her support should she ever need it. John had waited proudly as the team had rallied around, each had known that somehow she had become a part of their small group and would take her under their wing as they would any other injured bird.

"Pass the drives and cards over here Nicole... I'll get it set up for you. Happy to run it and you can talk us through the photos, tell us the when and where. That work for you Colonel Sheppard? Hey, Sam... glad you could join us..." Rodney's patter was welcome, filling the quiet and giving Nicole time to gather her thoughts and her emotions together. Sam stood in the door looking quietly around at those gathered in the conference room, took in the dried tears on Nicole's face and sent raised eyebrows in John's direction. His responding look quite clearly told her to back off for now and she gave a small nod before replying to Rodney.

"Rodney. I thought I had better come along check out these photos myself. Nicole? Carson wants you back for a check up later on today. Ok?" She watched for Nicole's reaction, attempting to read between the emotions to see what was really going on inside her. She needed to have a chat with John, in private to make sure that Nicole had the necessary support. As base commander, all personnel were under her jurisdiction, and that included drop in guests such as Nicole.

The first series of photos began running across the screen. The colours and definition of each photo were stunning, exceptionally so. They had asked her to go back several days prior to her arrival in the Triangle and she did as asked, and the photos included mostly scenery as this was her particular specialty, however there were many with various people and it was these in particular that both Sam and John were the most interested in.

A group dinner on the night prior to her departure to the Triangle caught John's eye first. Letting a few more shots go by he spoke up. "Rodney. Pause that one for a moment... yeah, that last one with that group of people standing on that wharf. Nicole? Where did you take that one?"

She peered closer and a small smile came to her face. "We were loading gear onto the boat and one of the crew had slipped and fallen into the water. I wanted to capture some of the expressions on the people that were around at the time. I had thought about working on a photo essay that dealt exclusively with a range of emotions, and for some reason, this particular incident appealed to me. That man over there? The one in the jeans and white tshirt? He wasn't a part of the crew, at least he didn't appear to be. He followed them around as though he knew them, but a few things that he did and said made me think that he was just along for the ride. To be honest, I didn't give it a lot of thought. At least, until I looked at this picture."

John stood up and went to stand behind her chair, a hand resting gently on one shoulder. "Do you remember his name, Nicole? Were you ever introduced to him?"

She took her focus away from the screen and gave him a slight look over her shoulder. "No... not that I can recall. But that was not so unusual. I didn't get to meet all the crew, just the captain and several of the deck hands who I had the most contact with. Let's see if he comes up in any of the other pictures. Rodney?"

"Onto it..." The photo changed and John flicked his glance down to Nicole's face, noting the intensity of the expression. She was back in her element. Her photos, her world. This had been the right thing to do and John felt a brief moment of satisfaction.

Several photos later and he did not appear again. The others in the room appeared spellbound by the quality and beauty of the photos, especially Teyla who had longed to visit earth, having heard so many stories about the beauty of the landscape.

Nicole pushed out of her chair and paused thoughtfully in front of the screen, cocking her head sideways as though in thought. "Rodney? Go ahead a few more shots... I'm starting to remember something. Something that may be important."

Rodney did as instructed and once again, the man in the jeans and white tshirt appeared in one of the photos. It was a glorious sunset, taken the following day after the boat had set course for the Triangle and she had wanted to capture both the colour, but also the reaction of those who had been watching that same sunset with her. But what stood out in far more brilliant relief was the fact that the mystery man was not watching the sunset. He was watching the photographer. And because her focus had not been on the man, she had not noticed. Until now.

"John? That man. Look at his eyes. He doesn't know I'm including him in the photo, look at the way he is looking at me... hell." She flicked a hand through her hair and turned to look at John, surprise and a little anguish on her face. "Is that him? The one who pushed me overboard?"

He didn't answer her right away. "Rodney, can you enhance the photo, so that we can get more definition on the man, and less on the scenery."

"I'll have to upload the photo into another programme Colonel. Give me a few minutes, but it might be quicker if Nicole plays around with it perhaps? More her department I would imagine."

"Nic?" John wanted to give her the chance to either accept or decline, knowing that her own natural curiousity would likely ensure that she accepted the request.

"By all means... load it in Rodney, and I''ll play around with it." She moved over to where Rodney worked, standing close beside him and watching his fingers as they flew over the keyboard. Once he had uploaded the photo to a special programme he stepped back and let her take over, his own admiration coming out as he stood near and watched her work. Her deft fingers quickly brought up his image, increasing the pixels and taking out some of the background with rapid efficiency, so that within minutes that had a clear face on the computer screen, and punching a few more buttons, she managed to get the image transferred to the large projection screen so that the others could see clearly, the face of the man who had likely been responsible for her arrival in Atlantis.

John hissed in a breath and Sam flicked a sharp glance at him. "John? You know this man?"

"Know him? Hell, Sam... I served with him. In Afghansitan. And I'm guessing that he's not out on that boat for the scenery... He lost it over there. Had a melt down and had to be sent home. Rumour has it that once he was released from the military pysch ward he went darkside. Independent contractor, freelance soldier of fortune."

"I need a name John, then I'll get Jack onto it. We need to find out what he is up to and who he is affiliated to. Freelancer, or association. But I'm guessing he's just a small rung on a rather long ladder and we are going to have to do some serious climbing if we want to find out who resides at the top. But it's a start and if we can start following the inevitable trail... and there will be one – then we can start reeling them in. Good work team." Sam tossed a smile in Nicole's direction and went to leave the room, noting that Nicole had once again become engrossed in her photos and had continued running them through the projection screen, head tilted slightly to the side as she flicked through them one by one.

"Those photographs are beautiful, Nicole. We do not have the ability to capture true life in such a way on my world, and this is like participating in a little part of earth's history. Of earth's present. How gifted you are to be able to portray true life in such a wonderful way." Teyla stood beside Nicole, and John watched the two woman, both so very different as they bonded over something was was a way of life for one, and something entirely alien for the other.

"Thank you Teyla – these are my passion. They are who I am and any photographer worth their salt always leave a little piece of themselves in every picture. Or so they say..."

"I think that is indeed the case, Nicole. I can sense your personality in some of these photos, your sense of humour, your outlook on life. It is reflected in the way that some of the scenery and subjects have been portrayed and I can see the passion you have for this skill. We can be very fortunate if our life's work is an extension of who we are, as yours seems to be."

John saw Nicole's body momentarily still, and the face of a dark haired man, head tipped back in happy laughter, filled the screen. Nicole was mesmerised for a brief moment, and then suddenly galvanised into action, she leapt from her chair and stopped the show of photos with an impatient flick of her hand. She didn't stop, continuing her momentum so that she pushed past him with a distracted look on her face and moved quickly out of the conference room and into the hallway without a backward glance.

With a flick of his eyes at Teyla who simply shrugged her shoulders, he swore briefly and turned to follow her, determined to get to the bottom of what had upset her.

"Nicole. Nic... wait! Damn it. That photo... who is he?" He caught up with her and reached out for her good arm, insistently pulling on it to make her stop. She did, but refused to turn and meet his eyes, looking resolutely ahead for a moment, then dropping her chin so that she looked down at the ground. His hand slid down her arm and linked with her fingers, tugging gently so that she moved backwards slightly and came up against his body. He allowed his hand to band gently around her hip, dragging her closer and felt her sigh as though she had decided something.

"What is it Nic. Tell me who he is..."

"Was, John. He's gone... fate stepped in and made sure that the one person who brought any light into my sometimes dark world was taken away from me..." Her voice was calm, but he felt the tremor in her body and tightened his grip knowing that she wanted to run. He wasn't going to let her. Not this time.

"How, Nicole... how did it happen. Tell me, talk to me... let me in."

He felt her body sag slightly and kept his touch on her firm. "Short story, John. We were out on assignment, investigating the diamond mines in South Africa. There was an accident. An explosion. Our jeep flipped and I'm alive and he isn't. End of story."

A warmth stole throught him, unbidden and knew that the story was not a short one, but a lengthy chapter in a long and wonderful story, the story that was her life. But she had categorised it for now, compartmentatised it to a shortened version that she could deal with And he would leave it at that for now. For now. One day, she would tell him the details and take on some of that pain that filled a good portion of her soul.

"Aahh Nicole, sweetheart. I'm so sorry. I can only imagine what your life has been like since that happened. But I need you to know... there are others who would be happy to try and bring light into your darkness, if you'd give them a chance."

She looked at him then, really looked at him – and he saw the spark that lit those beautiful chocolate eyes and knew without a doubt that she'd let him be the one. Soon. When the time was right.


	17. Chapter 17 Excursion to the mainland

CHAPTER 17 – EXCURSION TO THE MAINLAND

He made a decision. She needed time out, and so did he. Away from the prying eyes, away from the conspiracy she had managed to get herself caught up in and away from the memories of something heartbreakingly sad, something that had managed to follow her from one galaxy to the next.

"Your pictures, Nic... they give you peace, solace...?" He didn't wait for her to answer, simply guided her down the hallway, back to the conference room so that she could pick up her camera.

"We'll get you some of that peace back... for a little while anyway. You game?"

She couldn't resist the small smile that lit up her face. He made her feel something she hadn't allowed herself to feel for a long time, and the truth be told? She was kind of sick of being alone,of keeping the memory of Ben alive... he would always claim that large part of her that had made her fall in love with him. Head over heels in love a long time ago. But perhaps it was time to move on, let go just a little. And perhaps this man beside her, who had managed to make her feel more in the space of a few days, than she had felt since Ben died – would be the one to bring some of the light back into the darkness.

"I'm game Colonel Sheppard. What did you have in mind... and I'll give you a heads up, ok? If it involves bedroom activities... not ready for that yet. Just saying..."

He laughed, a delighted bark of laughter. That irrespressible personality that could not be tampered down for long, and when it came out in all it's glory, he felt more than just a little overwhelmed.

"I'll take that into consideration... for now. No sweetheart, this is a little trip to the mainland. I found some caves over there, a while ago. Your photographer's eye would do it justice, I imagine. And you need some time out. It's close, it's safe and I might even let you fly."

This brought more than just a spark to those warm chocolate eyes. "You've got yourself a deal, Colonel John Sheppard. And John?"

He paused a moment, hearing something different in her voice and looked quickly down into those melt in your mouth eyes. "Yeah?"

"Thanks... for... you know... listening and stuff."

"Hey... I'm game for anything when it comes to spending some time with you. I think you get that by now, but if it's someone to listen to you and just let you be for now... then hey, I'll take what I can get and try and give you what you need. Ok?"

She nodded, leaning against him and tipping her face up towards his he had to bite down on the extremely painful desire to take her right there and then. Her lovely face smiled and using more than just a small measure of restraint, he dipped his own head and lightly brushed his lips across her forehead, keeping it deliberately casual, feeling her body relax against his. _Time... she needs time... and soon? She'll need me. I'll make sure of that..._

True to his word he let her fly, once he had cleared the jumper bay and had the craft hovering gently above the great city, looking down at the magestic spires that made up the city of Atlantis. He allowed her to skim the ship gracefully over the ocean, flying low and fast then pulling up to an impossibly tight angle that had even his seasoned stomach clenching in protest. But as he watched her face and saw the magic of what she was doing begin to unfold there, he deliberately kept his censoring to himself. Let her fly the ship the way she wanted. Fortunately the Lantian vessels were perfectly in tune with those they were interfaced with, and if a fiesty commander rode her helm, then she would respond in kind. And would give back as good as she got.

He allowed her to land the craft, heart in his mouth a little and sighed in relief when the ship touched down with a gentle whisper in a clearing somewhere near the centre of the mainland. There were mountains on either side and he had watched the concentration on her face as she had settled that naughty, irreverent edge to a low simmer and brought the ship under her control in a graceful and extremely natural way. Her flying ability was excellent and John was left in no doubt that when she did something, she would always strive to do it well. Competitive in nature and eager to try the new and the untested. He shook his head slightly, a little overwhelmed now at the feelings she was causing to flood through him, wondering if perhaps she was a little too much woman for him to handle.

Flicking a gaze down at her tights and tshirt, he chuckled. At least her shoes were her own. "I'll put in a clothing order for you from earth when we get back... unless something urgent is required, we usually put in an order for items say once a week. Let me know what you need and I'll put it on the list. All very well to live in borrowed clothes, but I think the choice is a little limited... there's not many woman here with your build..."

Her sharp glance had him widening his eyes in alarm. "My build? Hmmm... I could take offence by that comment. You have a problem with my build?"

"Ahhh no... not at all..." He smothered another chuckle as they moved easily towards the nearest group of low rise mountains at whose base he had located a cave system on one of his many exploratory visits to the mainland. "It's just that you're... small, tiny even. And we don't have so many... tiny... women on base." Another chuckle as the statuesque build of Sam Carter came to mind, then flicked his gaze over the tiny frame of the woman who walked beside him. She stood barely five foot two in sneakers and came up to his shoulder, and soaking wet? Hell, she probably didn't even make a hundred pounds. So no, not the typical size of the women who so far inhabited the city of Atlantis. They just seemed... bigger.

"I do believe you are making fun of me, Colonel John Sheppard... and don't try that innocent look on me. I've got your measure... and as to clothes? These are all good. Once you get to know me you'll get that. I'm not into high fashion, I don't bother with makeup and dresses? Yikes! I'd get tangled up in a heartbeat. Give me a comfortable pair of jeans and my trusty sneakers and I'm good to go. You want glitter and glamour in a woman? Cast your eyes in another direction, my friend..."

Another dry chuckle, this time aimed at himself. "Glitter and glamour I've done, Nic. And believe me, once you strip away the layers you're still left with the sharp edges and these don't make good bed mates..."

This time it was her turn to laugh, loudly and with abandon. She stopped, placing her hands on her knees to get her breath and he paused behind her, a little taken back by the lovely sound and the flush of colour that had come to her face. "Ahh John. I do believe you are exactly what I need right now..." Pushing herself upright, she indicated the dark base of the largest mountain they were walking towards. "Is that the opening to the caves... looks a little creepy... and this place? Seems like the rest of the world forgot it."

"Rest of what world? Different galaxy sweetheart, don't forget that. Many worlds... many planets and a whole lot of different. But yeah, there's not a lot of population out here. The Athosians have the one settlement near the coast – remember, you flew over them. There's some wildlife out here, not much in the way of predators so that Athosians are able to hunt as they need. This place is great to come if you need to get away from humanity. Atlantis is great, don't get me wrong. But it is a city full of people. Not green parks to escape to... so this is it. Our little escape. The mainland. When we get days off, some of the guys go fishing, hunting, hiking or just take up residence on the beach for a few hours. Here we can pretend we're back on earth, not light years away from the place where we grew up."

He pulled out a flashlight as they reached the entrance to the caves and feeling her breath against his shoulder, he turned and looked down at her. "No problems in the dark?"

"I'm not gonna run screaming out of here like a girl, Colonel..."

He chuckled. "You are a girl... Nic."

"Yeah, but not that... kind of girl."

"No, sweetheart, that you are not!" He turned and entered the caves, hearing the slight scuffling as she followed behind him and content to allow silence to follow them down the tunnel, he let the darkness wash over them, caressing them with it's own brand of calm.

Suddenly the tunnel widened and opened up to a magestic cavern that had a natural light from a narrow tunnel above that led up to the surface and the light. The light patterns were extraordinary, playing in symphony down through the gloom, creating eddies and swirls that were almost alive in their quality. There were drawings on the walls of the cave, she had seen that immediately. Beautiful, large and detailed drawings. Completed by hands unknown, foreign ancestors to the people who had once inhabited this land.

"Oh John... these are … stunning, really. Thank you..." Her voice was a whisper, and she fumbled with her camera, bumping slightly against him in her haste. He put out a hand to steady her and kept it there while she moved around the cave, her face turned up to attract the rays of light and he held his own breath as they formed a halo of sorts around her head, bathing her in a surreal light that played softly over her beautiful face and made him want to bury his hands in her hair and drag her mouth against his.

She moved around the cave, taking photos and murmuring to herself and letting her go, he was content to simply stand back and watch her work. The engrossed look on her face as she calculated an angle and the look of pure pleasure when she knew that she had got the shot she wanted. He could have watched her all day and it was a noise from the entrance of the tunnel that had his attention taken away from her and back to the here and now.

"Nic?" His voice was barely a whisper and it took her a moment to register it. She looked at him in surprise, as though she had forgotten he was there.

"I heard something, I need to check it out. Stay here, ok?"

Waiting for her nod, he gave her one last long look, then turned and entered the tunnel. It had been the sound of a rock striking rock, but softly as though whoever had done it had been trying for stealth. He crept quietly along the tunnel and heard the murmer of voices, quiet and indistinct and felt a fissure of unease creep along his spine. Athosian's? Out hunting perhaps, and seeing the craft land had decided to investigate? This was not their normal hunting area, but they didn't mean anything. They could have been out here for any reason. They were almost nomadic people, and wandering at will. He keep his movements deliberately quiet. If they were Athosian's then that was all good. But his spidey senses had come into play, and a part of himself thought that perhaps those voices he had heard, were not from the village.

He carefully took out his weapon – he was not taking any chances. There was at least one spy in Atlantis, and yes they had wanted to smoke them out. If whoever was watching Nicole had seen her and John leave for the mainland, then there was a good chance that they had been followed. A part of him had realised this when he had made the suggestion, and while he hadn't wanted to voice it out loud, he had hoped that this would bring someone out into the open. He had kept this information to himself, knowing that Sam would want him to have some sort of backup,but as usual, he had wanted to take matters into his own hand, and force their hand.

He crept down the tunnel and saw the light around the corner. The end. The voices had stopped and additional caution stilled his movements. There was no sound and he flattened himself against the rock and eased around the corner, squinting his eyes slightly against the intrusion of the sunlight. He heard a slight scuffling sound, then a pair of surprised eyes as he ducked around the corner. He did not have time to register anything. A stinging blow to the back of his neck and darkness swirled immediately, drawing him down into it's welcome arms.


	18. Chapter 18 The tables were turned

CHAPTER 18 – THE TABLES WERE TURNED

"John... wake up John. Please..." She finally surfaced from the cave, a small part of her subconscious had grasped the fact that he had been gone too long. Her own spidey senses had kicked in, and that same part of her had known that if he had been gone that long, then something had happened to him. So she had not run from the cave, simply crept quietly as he had, ears open for foreign sounds, voices that shouldn't be there. She had heard nothing, and this had alarmed her even more. She had know that John would simply not just leave her there, and this had made her break into a run and when she had pushed out into the sunlight, squinting against it's harshness, she had almost tripped over the body that lay near the entrance of the cave.

"John.. please." She had dropped down onto her knees beside him. Quickly scanning the area around her, she had seen no signs of another person, and there was no sound either. But not so far away, a jumper had risen into the sky, near where they had left their own jumper and her heart dropped. Either they had been left out here without any way to get back, or someone had followed them in a second jumper. That same someone who had obviously done some damage to the Colonel.

He groaned, but did not stir. She got her one good arm under his shoulder and attempted to get him into a sitting position, but he was just too heavy and her sprained wrist began to throb with the additional activity. She jumped up, and scanned the area again and knew that there was no way she was going to get him back to the jumper on her own. Dropping back down to her knees beside him, she carefully felt around behind his head and it came away wet. Blood. Someone had hit him, and hit him hard. And she was stuck out here in the proverbial creek, and most assuredly without a paddle.

"Damn!" She swore to herself, and dragged a hand through her hair, looking down at his face. "Radio... of course." She reached down to the radio that all personnel kept on their ears and pushed it once as she had seen him do. It crackled to life and she leaned down and spoke into it, but it went dead before she could finish her sentence. Tapping it again in frustration, she saw that it had been damaged in his fall against the rocks.

"Ah crap... John? You need to wake up, please... I can't get you out of here on my own, and your radio is not working..." He stirred slightly, and his eyes opened and she registered immediately the pain that sprung into them and the hand that snaked immediately around to the back of his head to reach for the wound there.

"Nic? Someone here... where's my weapon?" His arm fumbled down to the weapon that still rested at his side and she placed her hand over his own.

"Stay still for a moment John. I'm going to help you to get up... I can't get the radio to work, I think it was damaged in your fall. If I can get you up, then you can lean on me and we'll get back to the jumper. You up for that?"

He responded to the quiet authority in her voice and took a deep breath. She hadn't gone to pieces on him and he could allow her to take some control for a few moments while he got his equilibrium. He had been hit by someone, he knew that. A pair of startled eyes flashed against the back of his mind, his last image as he felt the blow to the back of his head. Those eyes, familiar? He struggled with memory and Nicole watched as the concentration creased his face and she reached a hand down to settle softly on his brow.

"Leave it for now John. Clarity will come later. Just rest a moment, you'll need your strength to help me get you out of here. Remember? I'm... tiny..."

Throwing his words back in his face brought a small smile to his face and it was this that she was looking for.

"Ok John, we'll do this. Together. Slowly, ok? I'll help you to sit up, get your equilibrium before we try and get you to your feet. The jumper's not so far. We can do it."

He eased himself to a sitting position, groaning as the change in position brought a wave of dizziness and more pain than he was prepared to acknowledge right now. He took deep, calming breaths and when he was sure that he could attempt it, he gave her a signal and waited until she was positioned beside him, her good side supporting him as best as she could, and helped him get to his feet. He staggered hard, leaning against her and unprepared for his sudden weight,they went down together. He landed heavily on top of her, unable to support his fall and he felt, rather than heard, the sharp woosh of air as he put more weight on her than she could handle.

She pushed at his shoulder, rolling him slightly sideways and eased her body out from under his while he struggled to right himself. Groaning herself now, her shoulder was throbbing and the wrist hurt like a bitch, but she needed to suck it in and help get him upright or they would not be getting out of there in a hurry.

"Damn it Nic – leave me here and go back to the jumper. Radio from there. It's only a fifteen minute walk from here. I'll be ok. There's no way I can make that walk right now, I'm just too damn dizzy and if it was just me? I'm damn well stagger there on my own. But I know you'll insist on helping... and you can't hold me up. So you need to go get some help. Ok?"

His hazel eyes had glazed a little and she suspected that consciousness was only borderline right now and knew that the head injury he had was more severe than she had first thought. He should not be moving around, and even with her help, leaving him here while she went back to the jumper was the better alternative.

He pushed at her, hand splayed out on her rump to help her back to a standing position. "Go, Nicole. Now. Please. I'll be fine. You'll be safe. They've gone."

"It's not my damn safety I'm worried about John. It's yours. Leaving you here? What else is prowling around out here. You're in no condition to defend yourself."

"And you are, sweetheart? I've got my weapon, I'll be fine. Just bring some help back here."

Her lips firmed in a straight line and John knew that she was battling anger right now. Yeah, he was stubborn. But he was also right. She turned and broke into an easy run, crossing the clearing quickly and was soon out of sight. He breathed a sigh of relief. He was in a lot of pain, and didn't need her seeing him like that right now. He wanted to deal with it alone, and with her gone? He could attempt to get himself up and moving, without putting any pressure on her.

She entered the jumper and quickly scanned the control panel, looking for the radio. She had seen him operate it, but her mind refused to assist and she felt a moment of panic as she stared helplessly at the array of controls. "Damn it, Nicole. Think. Can't be that hard." She sat down in the control chair and as the word radio sprang into her mind she heard the crackle as it was activated and she remembered that everything on board the ship was controlled by her mind activation, by the ATA gene that coursed more or less harmlessly through her blood.

"Colonel Sheppard? Come in."

A relieved laugh escaped her and she ran a hand through her hair, struggling a little to get her breath and her equilibrium back. "Yeah.. um, it's me. Nicole. There's been an accident. John.. ahh... Colonel Sheppard's been hit and he has a head injury. I can't get him back to the jumper. I need some help... please..."

The response from Atlantis was immediate. "Nicole? It's me, Sam. Colonel Carter. Are you Ok?"

She couldn't help the small sob that escaped her. Relief at hearing a friendly voice and knowing that she could get some help back for John. "Sam.. yeah, I'm good. But John? Someone hit him, someone was here following us. They had a jumper... hurry, please. His head is bleeding and he is too dizzy to walk."

"Is he conscious Nicole?" She heard Carson Beckett's voice this time, and breathed another sigh of relief. Help would be coming.

"He was unconscious when I found him Dr Beckett, but he woke up. I tried to help him up, but he's too heavy."

"Don't worry lass. Sam has already dispatched another jumper, as we speak. You'll have help soon. Can you wait for the jumper to arrive, so that they can locate you?" Carson's voice was calm, and she instantly reacted to it, taking deep breaths and feeling her racing heart begin to slow.

"Hurry, Dr Beckett. I don't want to leave him too long. Tell Sam that whoever was following us came in a jumper."

"Nicole? It's Sam again... I have that information and there's a small problem. I'll discuss it with you and John when you get back. Go and wait for the jumper to arrive Nicole. It won't be long. Atlantis out."

The radio fell ominously silent and she cast a final look at the control panel, but pushed herself out of the seat and out the door, scanning the sky. True to Sam's word, the jumper arrived within minutes and she recalled that it had been a short trip across to the mainland, if one didn't count the occasional showing off.

Ronon leapt out of the jumper, along with Major Lorne who had been piloting. She had met him briefly on that first day in Atlantis and acknowledged him now with a small smile. He had moved quickly to her side, putting out a hand to place gently on her arm as though to calm her. He had seen the panic in her eyes, but it was Ronon who said gruffly.

"Where is he Nicole?"

"I'll take you, it's not far. We were at the caves, I was photographing and then..." the words tumbled out of her as they jogged lightly across the clearing and Ronon flicked a concerned glance at her.

"Did he see who hit him? There's jumpers in and out of Atlantis at the moment. The Athosians are having a festival tonight, and there's been crews back and forward to the mainland with supplies and assistance. It'll be impossible to isolate the one that flew these guys in."

John had pushed himself up and was resting slightly bent over, against the side of the cave and they could see immediately, that he was pale and sweating. It was Nicole who sped up and reached his side first, sliding her shoulder in under his to take some of the pressure off him. He tried to straighten and looked down into her face,seeing the fear and panic there and sought to reassure her.

"I'm ok... and thanks, for getting help. You did good." His words were a little slurred, and Ronon, reaching his friend's side, eased Nicole out of the way and got a grip on the smaller man, propping him up and letting Major Lorne take the other side.

"Let's get you home Sheppard."

Relieved, John let them support him and they made it to the jumper reasonably fast, with Nicole bringing up the rear. She cast her eyes at the jumper they had come in and addressed Lorne.

"Do you want me to fly this one back? Or will Ronon?"

Ronon's voice was gruff. "I don't have the gene, and I doubt Sheppard will let you take this back on your own without an experienced pilot. Gene or not."

"You got that right Ronon... Nic? Leave it here. Someone will come back for it." His voice was soft but held that hint of steel she had come to recognise. That same hint of steel that made her want to disregard his request and take the pilot's seat right now, and fly the ship home. Authority did not sit well with her. She took her own advice and her own counsel and when pushed into a corner? She came out spitting and clawing like any wild animal. He saw that now. Saw the flare of disregard in her eyes and pushed himself away from Ronon, standing in front of her somewhat unsteadily. Grasping her chin in his hands,he kept his touch firm, needing her to know that he was serious.

"Look at me. You will not fly this without supervision. You wanna add heart attack to my list of ailments? Let it go, Nicole.. please."

He saw the instant she went from wildcat to sheathed claws and sagged slightly in relief. He didn't want a fight on his hands, didn't have the energy for it. "Good girl."

His knees buckled and she tried to catch him, feeling immediate remorse and allowed Ronon to get him into the jumper and secure in a seat. Lorne had watched the interaction and quirked an eyebrow at her before they entered the jumper.

"Wow... never seen the Colonel tread on eggshells quite like that... either he's really off his game, or someone has gotten under his skin." His voice was teasing and he spoke in jest. But had seen the look that had passed between the Colonel and the newly arrived guest from Earth, and while he didn't know the full story as to how she had arrived in Atlantis, there had been some talk but more to the point? If there had been any more sparks flying,then there would have been some serious combustion.

Nicole chose wisely not to comment.

There was no fanfare when they arrived in the jumper bay in Atlantis, but Carson was there to meet them with a gurney and Sam also rode shotgun, a worried look on her face. Ronon and Lorne managed to get John onto a gurney under much protest from him, and Carson held him down firmly as they moved out of the jumper bay and headed toward the infirmary, Nicole and Sam following. Ronon hesistated a moment, unsure whether to follow, then catching Lorne's eye, the smaller man indicated that he would grab another pilot and head back for the remaining jumper and Ronon nodded. Turning, he followed the others to the infirmary. His hand hovered over where his weapon sat securely at his hip. He flexed it slightly, needing to hit out at something. His friend had been attacked and the woman under his protection was being threatened by people here in Atlantis. That put them all at risk. Ronon's theory was act first, talk later and the itch he felt in his gun hand confirmed this. He needed to go after these people and bring them down before anyone else got hurt.

Sam's mouth was set in serious lines and her blue eyes held a glint of steel, not so different than what Nicole had seen in John's eyes. She was angry, not with her - she knew that, but it appeared her anger was directed at John.

"What the hell were you thinking, John? You took her out there alone, no backup - knowing that you would likely be followed. You deliberately set both yourself and Nicole up as bait. That is not acceptable. You know that."

"Sam...Colonel Carter?" Nicole's voice was hesitant and she moved toward the bed, intent on putting herself between Sam's anger and the man who lay in the bed, staring up at the base commander with resolve in his eyes, clouded only slightly by pain.

"Stay out of this Nicole. This is between John and myself. He knew what he was doing and deliberately put the two of you in danger. Without backup - and that Nicole? Is the thing I am having difficulty getting past."

"Wait a minute Sam... he took me to the caves to get away for a while... to take photos... not to set up a trap. John...?" Nicole's small body had insinuated itself between the fiery Colonel and the patient and she flicked her eyes up to the doctor, who wisely chose not to intervene. He simply continued probing John's head wound and kept his thoughts to himself. Looking back at Ronon who had entered the room late, she saw no help coming from that quarter. He looked angry as well.

"John...?" Something in his eyes had her raising her eyebrows in question. "You knew that we would attract attention leaving Atlantis like that? Why didn't you warn me.. damn..." She dropped her eyes to the blindingly white sheet that lay underneath the Colonel and she saw his hand lying tanned and strong against the sheet, saw it clench slightly then move, coming up to take her hand. She pulled away and he knew that anger had found it's way into her as well.

"My job to worry... not yours..." His voice was fading a little and she saw that he struggled to keep his eyes open. Carson had given him a shot of something, she had seen him moving resolutely toward the bed and out of the corner of her eye she had seen the needle that had plunged into his upper thigh, wincing slightly as she had tried not to look.

"You took me out there with you, so that makes it my job as well." She turned then, and pushed past the others, leaving the man on the bed gazing tiredly after her, questioning his actions and his decisions, wondering also, if he should begin questioning his feelings.


	19. Chapter 19 Lost in the fray

CHAPTER 19 – LOST IN THE FRAY

She questioned her anger, but went to see Sam first, before going back to the infirmary. Sam sat in her office, hunched slightly over the computer with a pensive look on her face.

"Colonel Carter... Sam?" Nicole knocked softly on the door before popping her head around and moving into the room as soon as she was acknowledged. "I need to talk to you. I need to find out what happened earlier."

"Sit down Nicole. I'm sorry to have upset you like that. It was really between John and myself and I would have preferred not to put you in the position of having to either defend or be angry at him. Protocol and rules are something that we try to follow as best as we are able out here. This is the front line, so to speak, and while we are only at war with one group, this is - for all intents and purposes, the one way back to earth. For us, and for those who seek to annihilate us in order to gain a new feeding ground. Without those rules, as with any society - we would fail. John knows this. He chose to flaunt those rules today, and while a part of me, the soldier? Understands why he did what he did - the commander in me needs to make him aware that it is not acceptable."

"What happened Sam? Did you find out who flew the jumper?" Nicole had made herself comfortable, even so far as to reach out and pick up one of Sam's paperweights, an unsual shaped cup with a heavy base. Absently, she turned it over in her hands, admiring the workmanship.

"That's the problem Nicole, and I need to discuss this with John when he is up and about. It's going to be almost impossible to isolate who flew that jumper. With the Athosians having their festival tonight, there have been all sorts of traffic between here and there. And even to isolate the time that you gave us - there were four jumpers that left at this time and all have been accounted for. That is, they all arrived at their destination and delivered what they were supposed to deliver. So we're back to square one."

"I don't think John got a good look at the one who hit him either... he said he saw a flash only, and he tried to recall features but perhaps when he is feeling better."

"Nicole, may I ask you something personal?"

Startled, Nicole looked quickly at the base commander, fairly sure she knew what was coming.

"What's happening between you and John. I'm sorry if I appear intrusive, but there's a potential situation that may arise, and your position here is more than just a little up in the air, as you well know. I don't know your history, although General O'Neill was kind enough to send through your bio, so I do have a heads up on what happened to your partner last year. I'm sorry, that must have been traumatic." She paused, watching as the eyes of the younger woman before filled slightly and saw her attempt to compose herself before answering.

"Yeah, that is personal and I prefer not to discuss either my partners death, or any possible relationship with Colonel Sheppard. And I stress the word "possible". You're right, my position here is uncertain and I have no wish to inflict myself on anyone for longer than necessary. If I can help sort out this mess, then I'm up for it. I'll act as bait, whatever... just tell me what you want me to do. I've blown enough lids off untruths and coverups over the years, I'm no stranger to the intricacies of an undercover operation, so if you let me have carte blanche, I'll find your man or men and bring them down. With a little help."

She was angry now and pushed herself up from her chair and angrily paced the room. Sam fought to keep down a smile She was like a tiny caged tiger, all claws and sharp teeth, but underneath was a softness that she did not allow herself to show. But Sam knew it was there, knew that she had been hurt and felt a urge to protect her.

"We'll work together Nicole. That's how we do it here. This is still run more or less as a military operation, we are a team and as such, decisions come from the top and are expedited by those who make up that team. We're happy to include you as a part of that team. You've proved you have strengths and abilities to bring to the table but I need to know that I can trust you to be a team player, and not an independent. Can I do that that, Nicole?"

"Don't treat me like a child. I may not have your military training, but I've out there in the world. My world. And I have street smarts, I can see inside a person and know when they're feeding me a line of crap. I'll work with you and be a part of your team. I'll follow orders... for as long as I think they're working. If I think they're not? Then I go my own way. That's the best I can give you for now. I won't lie to you, or pretend otherwise."

Respect for the photographer grew in Sam, and she gave it a minute's thought before nodding. "I trust you Nicole. There's something about you that makes me think you're essentially a good person and you'll do the right thing. I trust those instincts. If you want to get things started... a good place would be the Athosian festival tonight. Most people will be there, and they'll be watching to see what you do. They may attempt to make contact there. It'll be crowded and easy to get to you. I think we should let them make contact, get your instructions, pretend to work with them. That's the only way we are going to get to the top of the ladder. By starting at the bottom and working up. General O'Neill is still tracking down the man in your photo, following trails that have been blocked every step of the way. It'll take him some time, and this way? We can have a little of the fun at our end. You up for that?"

A smile crept over Nicole's face and suddenly she grinned. "Hell, yeah! And I even get to take photos... life is suddenly looking up!"

She swung herself out of the chair, lighter in both spirit and posture and almost danced to the door. Sam shook her head. She was almost a child, full of enthusiasm and energy and a mass of contradictions. If John wanted to pursue any sort of relationship with this woman, he would certainly have his hands full.

She burst into the infirmary an hour later and John's eyes were instantly drawn to her. He had woken up a half hour ago. Grumpy, thirsty and hungry. Certainly not the best patient in the world. Not by anyone's standards and certainly not by Carson's.

It was Carson who spoke to her first. "Ah lass. Just what the doctor ordered. I have an extremely grumpy Colonel that needs some entertaining or else I'm going to resort to a large and rather unpleasant needle to silence him."

Nicole's laughter rang out, clear and light and Carson's eyebrows rose and John just stared. Her face shone and he knew that something had changed in this woman and wondered what had brought on that change. Mercurial in mood and spirit without a doubt.

"Nic?" His voice was clearer and Nicole moved quickly to his side, smile still in place and her eyes probing his face to note that he appeared to be in less pain that when she had seen him last. "You get taken over by some alien entity? Where's the old Nicole... this one seems almost... happy."

She grinned, irrepressible now and bent down to drop a kiss lightly onto his forehead, causing his eyes to widen.

"And you Colonel, are apparently cranky. Wanna play a game?"

His eyes gleamed. "What kind of game? And can I get naked?"

Carson shook his head and wandered away. She was indeed a breath of fresh air and he wondered again what had changed.

"Clothes are not optional John, but you can choose the game. And yeah, I'm happy. I'm going to a festival tonight, get to take some great photos and hopefully meet up with the bastard who hit you. What's not to be happy about?"

His face immediately darkened. "The hell you are... Sam?" He suddenly bellowed her name, touching the place where his radio would normally be before realising that it had been removed after he had been brought into the infirmary. And recalling also that it had been broken.

Carson came running over with a worried look on his face. "Nic? Your happy face did not spread as much joy as I would have hoped... hmmm?"

"Jesus, John. Calm down. This is what we wanted. Smoke 'em out? Your words, not mine. And that is exactly what I'm going to do tonight. Sam and I talked about it."

He pushed himself out of the bed. "Not gonna happen. Not on my watch. Sam?" He bellowed again, not caring if there was no radio, simply venting out his frustration now.

Sam did come running. Carson had taken it upon himself to radio the Colonel and she arrived a little breathless in the infirmary.

"You bellowed John? You might want to keep your voice down to a dull roar... there were probably one or two people in Atlantis that may have missed you call..."

"Damn it Sam, enough! You can't send her to the festival as bait. Not without me there. If she goes, then I go. I feel fine, and if you're gonna work her into some sort of plan, then check with me first!"

Sam looked at him bemused. "Check with you? Last time I looked I was still base commander and decisions like that are mine. You run the military. This is not a military operation."

"It's a damn security operation, and I am head of security. Don't play a game of words with me, Sam. Not now."

"If you want to discuss this John, then fine. Let's discuss it. If you want to rant and rave, then no. Not interested. I'll override you and that'll be the end of that. So, what's it to be?"

He took a breath and saw the steel in her eyes. He'd pushed her too far, but damn it, they were all pushing him too far at the moment, and he felt he was about to snap. He did not do the invalid thing well, and with decisions being taken out of his hands, he hit out at the first thing he could. Those that were making the decisions. Time to back down a little and regroup. And bring things back around in his favour.

"Ok Sam... we'll talk. But if she goes, then I want to be there as well. That's a given. We'll talk strategy, but I need to be in on all the decisions... please."

He calmed himself as quickly as he could. He had seen the flash of aprehension that blossomed in her eyes at his sudden outburst and felt her withdrawal. The change in her mood was quick to follow and the anger rolled again across her lovely features. Like a small tidal wave she surged toward him, he hands held out until she made contact with his chest and pushed. Pushed hard.

"Stop treating me like a child. I don't need babysitting. I am an adult. Look!" He held her hands out now, indicating her body. "All grown up. Get it?"

He sighed. "I get it. Really. Calm down. But I'm your back up. No question, no argument. Together, ok?"

Her hands moved again, once again they were resting on his chest and he wondering at her restless energy, her constant need to move. Eyes drawn to her bandaged wrist, he lifted his own hands and wrapped them lightly around her wrists, careful of the damaged one.

"Calmer now?" He said it softly.

"Could ask you the same question... Colonel. I wasn't the one bellowing like a child having a tantrum."

Sam grinned. She couldn't help it – and Carson simply shook his head and wandered away. "She's got you there John. When you two have finished arguing semantics and comparing the size of each other's balls, come and see me. We'll discuss in more detail, what goes down tonight."

She turned and left them to it and heard a soft giggle which gradually grew louder. John definitely had his hands full with that one.


	20. Chapter 20 The festival

CHAPTER 20 – THE FESTIVAL

He found himself in the jumper bay later that evening, Ronon lounging against the side of a jumper – big weapon resting comfortably at his side. He was attempting to give last minute instructions to Nicole, wanting to make sure she went into the celebration with wide open eyes and as much intell as he was able to give her. She stood in front of him, sometimes rolling her eyes as he repeated the instructions to her and flicking the occasional glance over John's shoulder to see Ronon unashamedly grinning at her.

John huffed a breath, the temptation to take her over his knee and give her a spanking growing stronger by the minute. And when that particular temptation suddenly turned into an erotic pleasure, he felt a clenching in his gut and simply stopped talked and stared down at her. She saw it come into his eyes, and there was an answering flare in hers. Ronon saw it, and gave a groan of disgust, turning tail and heading in the jumper. The floorshow was no longer any fun.

"You'll be careful out there tonight, John?" All teasing was gone from her voice and she no longer felt the need to wind him up.

His hand rose and moved softly down her hair until it reached the end, then using the momentum, he tugged so that she moved closer to him. He looked down into her face and saw the concern there, and knew immediately where it came from and felt honoured that it was directed at him.

"Hey... don't you worry about me, Nic. This is what I do, I'd rather you spent the energy in taking care of yourself. Makes my job easier..."

Her hand snaked around his neck and pulled slightly so that it brought his head down towards hers and he no longer held back. Dropping his head down, he touched her lips gently, then when she applied more pressure, he increased his own so that he could taste the flavour that was inherently her and knew that he could get lost in these feelings that were coursing through him. Her body moved into his and he felt her in all the places they touched, as though the sudden heat generated melded them together. It was John who pulled free and looked down into her flushed face and as he heard her shuddering breath he ran a hand gently down her cheek, following down until it rested at her waist.

"Ok, wow... it's been a long time... and that was... wow..." Her voice was warm as treacle and a little wistful, as though remembering another time, another place.

"Eloquent, Miss Harmon. I see why you rely on pictures to say what you mean..."

She swatted him around the ear and pulled away, this time slanting a grin in his direction before she stepped on board the jumper. _There, _ she thought. _Back on the horse now, so to speak, and I didn't get thrown off. Not yet... If I hold on to those reins tightly enough, perhaps I can enjoy the ride._

And the smile stayed on her face throughout the short trip across the Lantien sea and was still there when they left the jumper to join the celebration. Partly due in fact that John held her tightly beside him and the touch of his hand was like a promise that her life could know the light again.

"I'm gonna get some Ruus wine. Want me to bring some back? John? Nicole?"

"We're good Ronon – need to keep our wits about us tonight." John waved him away, but Nicole called out.

"Change the 'we' to "I", Ronon. Yes please to the wine... I'd love to try some. John can keep his wits about him, and I'll let mine have a little help." She widened her eyes as John seemed about to protest and put a finger on his lips to silence him. He smiled against her fingers and dragged her closer so that he could thread his hands in her long hair, tipping her face up to his.

"Dance?"

"Thought we were working, Colonel Sheppard... later maybe. I want to take some photos. The firelight is amazing, and the expressions on their faces – so open and unguarded. So different than most of the faces you see on earth. They have more to fight for here, yet they have less. Does that make sense?"

"Yeah, and I know what you mean. Go and take your photos. I'll not be far away, and I'll keep you in my sight. Always."

She pulled away and slung her camera into her hand and John watched as she disappeared into the crowd. He had no trouble keeping his eyes on her. She radiated her own kind of energy, sparking as though alight with some special as yet, undiscovered, element. He watched the men within the group, their eyes drawn to her also, as though of their own accord. She was oblivious to their attentions. Even when several Athosian men stopped her to ask her to dance, he watched her politely, laughingly decline and bring her camera up to her face, again and again. At one point Ronon sidled closer to her and handed her a giant tanker of Ruus wine, and he sighed. She had no idea how potent that particular drink was and wondered if the ensuing headache in the morning was going to be worth the small pleasure that it would bring tonight.

The wine brought a warmth to her and she felt the buzz as alcohol coursing through her small frame and flooded her mind with emotional overload. Her camera always in hand, she saw pictures where there were none and saw paintings and art where there had been nothing before. Half an hour later she found herself in John's arms, dancing to a tune that she did not know, but felt through to her very core.

Looking down into her flushed face, he smiled. "I see the wine is doing it's thing... hmmm?"

"If you mean giving me this delicious feeling of being on top of the world? Then, yeah... bring me some more. Tastes... yummy."

His head dipped down and her ran his tongue over her lips, causing her her laugh. "Yep!" He agreed. "Tastes... yummy."

She stumbled slightly and he tucked her a little tighter against him. "Mmm, I think you have definitely had enough embibement, Miss Nicole Harmon. You are a little drunk, and while I have been carefully observing all those gathered here, I have been unable to locate anyone who is acting in the least suspicious. Seems like they decided not to take this opportunity after all."

"S'ok, John. We got to dance... I got to take some photos... and life feels pretty damn fine about now. But nature calls... so if you'll save the next dance for me... oh, and if Ronon comes by, then yes, I'll take another flagon of that... Ruus... mmmm."

She whirled away from him, eyes sparkling and drifted off in the direction of the bathrooms and John stared after her. Hoping that his heart was not on his sleeve right now. A guy needed to have a little dignity, after all. Ronon clapped him on the back, bringing him out of his reverie. In his hand he held another tankard of the wine for Nicole, and John shook his head.

"The lady has had enough Ronon – she's a lightweight and this stuff will knock her for six."

"You guys seem to have stopped fighting... long enough to dance, anyway." Ronon took a long drink of his own wine, regarding his friend thoughtfully.

"She's under my skin, Ronon. No getting around that."

"She feel the same?" Ronon felt the need to look out for his friend.

"She will, Ronon. She will."


	21. Chapter 21 Contact is made

CHAPTER 21 – CONTACT IS MADE

She fumbled a little as she came out of the bathroom. That wine had indeed snuck up on her and curled it's insistent fingers around her balance, knocking her just a little off her axis. She giggled, then clapped a hand over her mouth. _Woops, _ she thought. _Should have listened to John. That stuff is lethal, and yeah... I'm drunk... oh crap._

She didn't get to finish her thought. Her arm was grabbed roughly and a hand clamped over her mouth. Her reflexes had not been totally decimated by the alcohol and she bit down hard on the hand, feeling a moment's satisfaction when someone swore softly behind her. The elation was shortlived as she was dragged against a hard body and a painful grip taken on her sprained wrist. Tears sprung to her eyes as the pain erupted along her arm and into the already bruised muscles of her shoulder and she attempted to kick backwards to do what damage she could.

"Stop it, Nicole. I'm not going to hurt you. Damn it, I only want to talk to you. There are things I need to explain to you and I need your help in getting them done. That's the reason we brought you here... sshhhh."

She instantly stilled knowing that contact had been made, and struggled to shift the alcoholic fog that slid over her senses. He felt her struggles cease and lessened his grip slightly, murmuring in her ear when she did not attempt to escape.

"Good girl. Now, we're just going to go for a little stroll, two friends, talking and enjoying the festivities, ok? Your security detail will be looking for you soon, so I need to get you away from the crowd and somewhere private."

She didn't speak, trying instead to commit his voice to memory in case she did not get a good look at his face. Her reporter's skills were kicking in on auto pilot and she filed away her direction also, in case she was left to find her own way back. His hands hand gentled once she had stopped struggling and he simply grasped her upper arm, her good arm and for that she was grateful.

"Do I get to at least see who the hell I'm talking to?" She tried to sound petulant, then her voice was stilled momentarily as she was pushed behind a tree and a blindfold was tied around her eyes.

"I guess that answers that question..." she muttered to herself, and felt the disorientation of being dragged off into the darkness with only her captor for company.

They didn't walk for long, and she felt the occasional scrape of bushes and branches against her arms which indicated that it was not a well travelled path that they were on. He didn't speak again, and although she tried several times to engage him in conversation she eventually stopped, worried that she would be gagged.

She begin to feel slightly ill from the wine and taking deep breaths he must have realised her imminent distress, because he stopped suddenly and pushed her relatively gently to the ground, allowing her to take shuddering breaths in order to quell the nausea. A hand reached for her hair to pull it back from her face and she felt something cool on her neck. Water Whoever it was meant her no harm and was even solicitious enough to provide some measure of comfort.

She heaved once but nothing came up and feeling a little better from the lack of movement, she dropped her head so that it rested on her knees and she felt the weight of another body dropping down beside her.

"We can talk here as well as anywhere. I don't know that you can go much further... first time on Ruus wine, eh? You'll suffer tomorrow, I'll tell you that now."

She wanted to laugh. Here, in the middle of god knows where with a man who had kidnapped her to do god knows what, and he was concerned about the state of her head tomorrow after drinking too much wine.

"If you don't mind, I'd rather discuss your reasons for dragging me out here..."

"I want the stargate programme exposed. I want the world, our world... to know what they are doing out here, what they are spending the public's money on. Do you have any idea how much it costs to operate that stargate? The city in Atlantis? How many millions it costs each time that stargate is activated? And for what purpose? To keep the enemy from the door...? I'll let you in on a little secret, Nicole. The people who hired me, the ones whose message I pass on to you... they let me in on a little secret. That enemy at the door? Wouldn't give earth a second look if this lot hadn't poked their rather pompous noses into their affairs in the first place. The wraith? They knew nothing of earth... until this lot stepped foot on Atlantis and set all the bells and whistles off. That's arrogance, sweetheart and it needs to be stopped."

She didn't interupt, simply let him have his say and followed the nuances in his voice. It wasn't his battle, she knew that now. He was a voice, a mouthpiece – sent to deliver a message. Idly she wondered how much he was getting paid to do this job, and where that money was coming from... likely the public, if he had bothered to think about it. Funnelled from the black government departments that she had spent her life trying to bring down.

"You're a reporter Nicole, and a damn good one. That's why you were chosen for his job. This needs to end and the only way anyone will believe what happens out here, is pictures. Your pictures, taken by an accredited photographer and published in an accredited magazine. This will be the story of your life, Nicole. Handle it right, and this will set you up for life..."

She raised her head, feeling him behind her and wondered what he was doing. "You want me to focus on the bad out here... I get that, but think about it. They are doing good as well... I have seen it. I get that you want the public to have the right to decide, but perhaps they're not ready for this yet. Hell, I don't know that I'm ready."

"You don't get a choice in the matter Nicole. I was sent to ask you politely, and that is what I am doing now. You don't do this, the group I work for? They'll kill you. And they won't stop there. Your family will be next, your friends. You don't want to make an enemy of these people, trust me on that. They are far reaching and more powerful that anything you can imagine."

She felt a water container pressed against her lips and she took a grateful sip. The wine had made her mouth dry and uncomfortable. He continued once she had taken her drink.

"You need to keep this to yourself. I know you have a security detail and I see that you're getting...close...to Colonel Sheppard. I'll kill him if I have to. This fight is yours, he has his own agenda and can't be party to this one."

Her shoulders slumped slightly and she felt a startlingly powerful moment of defeat. Her voice was soft. "What do you want me to do.? How do you want me to do it?"

"Good girl... take as many pictures as you can. This is going to be an exclusive photo essay. You have the contract with a magazine, it's all set up. They don't know yet the title, but your name was enough to secure a good section of a reputable magazine and for now? I'll not give you those details. When you've got your pictures... and I need as many as I can get. Not just of Atlantis, but the Wraith..."

Her head jerked up. "Are you serious? We're talking soul sucking vampire type monsters here... and you want bloody pictures? I've been shot at, nearly drowned, fallen into holes... and that's just on this assignment. And now you want me to shake hands and play nice with soul sucking demons?"

Her voice had risen several octaves and her outrage brought a dry chuckle from the man behind her. "Long range lens will be fine... I don't need a photo of you actually shaking a Wraith hand..."

"Oh good... that is so much better..."

"You've got a month Nicole... and they're only giving you that much time because they want the photos to be believable, the best that you can take. This shadow group... they've got eyes everywhere, so don't trust anyone... but me."

She heard something in his voice and paused. "And you? What do they have on you, to make you do this? Hmmm?"

"Me? I do this for the money... I have no allegiance to anyone other than the highest bidder..."

Her laugh held no mirth. "Then I pity you."

His voice sounded further away and she realised that he had left her side and was moving away. "Don't waste your pity on me Nicole. I am beyond redemption. I have done more terrible things in my life than I can ever attone for, so no point in trying. Do what I ask and you'll come out a queen. That is a promise. Refuse? You'll know misery like no other..."

There was silence in the clearing now and she realised that he had gone. She struggled with the blindfold and leaned forward, retching now into the grass – the combination of wine and fear and something else... hopelessness.


	22. Chapter 22 The role of her life

CHAPTER 22 – THE ROLE OF HER LIFE

She pushed herself to her feet and fought the wave of dizziness that threatened to take her back down. Trees swam in her line of vision and she turned her head a little wildly, trying to get her bearings. She was in a small clearing completely surrounded by trees and there was no obvious path leading in any particular direction. Lifting her head she tried to hear the sound of revelry that would be coming from the festival, but heard nothing. She did not think that they had walked very far, but when she flicked a glance down to her watch, she found that over an hour had passed at least, since she had left John and gone to find a bathroom.

_Ah crap..._ she thought. _What do I do? Stay here and hope someone finds me? Or take a chance and pick a direction and go for it. Damn it. Rules of survival, stay with the ship that's going down. Haha... yeah right. No ship out here. No nothing. Go or stay...think, damn it Nicole._

In a moment of clarity she chose flight, suddenly unable to simply sit here and wait for help. It was getting cooler and a breeze had picked up and she needed to keep moving for warmth. She had on her jeans and a tshirt and her arms were now studded with goosebumps and she rubbed them briskly to get some warmth back into them.

Looking up at the sky she took a stab at direction and set off, pushing her way through the undergrowth once leaving the clearing. Sink or swim, and she would do her damnedess to stay afloat.

She walked for some time and felt the scrape of bushes. Her arms were covered in blood from her flight in the darkness and she had a shallow cut along one cheek. Some sort of high saw grass that she had not seen in the darkness, until the sharp pain and the drip of blood down her cheek. She felt the small tendrils of terror as they threatening to rise up and overwhelm her and she no longer had the energy to push them away. She was likely getting further away from the Athosian settlement and she was feeling dizzier by the moment – the effects of the wine were increasing if anything else. Drymouthed and suddenly more alone than she had ever felt in her life, she dropped down onto the ground beside a tree and began to sob until that too turned to exhaustion and her eyes closed.

She felt strong arms lifting her, the sensation of a boat moving and forced her mind to clear and her eyes to open. She felt sick, thirsty and tired and when her eyes opened it was to look into the slightly concerned ones of the large Satedan, Ronon Dexx.

One hand tapped his ear piece and he murmured into it quietly. "Got her Sheppard. She's ok... I'm bringing her out now..."

"Ronon...?" Her voice sounded far away to her own ears and she saw something akin to sympathy in his eyes. He didn't speak, just turned and strode quickly away, her small weight in his arms nothing more than a minor inconvenience.

"Put me down, Ronon... not feeling so good..."

He stopped quickly, letting her down and holding her until she felt steady on her feet. Leaning over she was sick again, and he afforded her the same comfort that her kidnapper had done. Holding her long hair back and passing her water when she had finished. She took a long drink and peered up at him through her lashes, not sure whether to feel relieved or embarassed. He bent to pick her up again and she stepped away from him with her hands out.

"No... I'll walk. You carrying me like that... seasick...ughhh..."

"You ok now?" There was some sympathy in his voice and his eyes flicked to the blood on her face and arms. "Sheppard's like an angry bear at the moment, so heads up on that one."

She grimaced. "Got it..." and reached out a hand to grab hold of his belt. She'd walk out of here, but needed a little support while she did it.

A crashing through the bushes got her attention and the sinking feeling in her stomach told her who it was. John. _What do I tell him? So far it's between me and that man who dragged me out here, and he was clear on one thing. Keep this to myself... damn... I can't do this alone... but put my family at risk? Put John at risk? But if I don't tell him, he'll be more at risk... without the facts, he can't do his job..."_

She faltered as these thoughts rolled through her mind, then pushed them aside as a dishevelled Colonel burst out of the bushes beside them, coming to an almost skidding halt beside her, hands reaching automatically for her. She stepped back cautiously, wanting to read his face first, his expressions. She knew she'd find her answers there.

She saw worry, fear and anger and something else... those unexplained feelings that had been creeping along her spine for the past few days. Those new and inexplicable feelings that she had whenever she was around him. Saw them mirrored in his eyes and simply sighed... her decision made, she stepped into his arms and let him hold her and felt the tension and anger leave his body as her own gave him some measure of comfort.

"God, Nic... I don't know whether to put you over my knee right now or kiss you... what the hell happened to you? You just disappeared... damn it! Someone said they'd seen you leaving the bathroom and it looked like you were talking to a man... another said you were alone. No one could give me a straight answer... damn it! You just took ten years off my life. Do you have any idea how long we've been looking for you?"

She watched as he dragged a hand through his already unruly hair and her voice was small as she answered. "No..."

"You've been gone for almost six hours! Half of Atlantis has been out looking for you, not to mention the Athosians... what happened to you?"

They were almost back at the settlement and she knew that they would be surrounded by people soon. She stopped and the arm that was holding her tightened.

"What is is Nicole... tell me."

"Contact... I have my instructions... oh god..." She leaned over again, retching – but this time there was nothing left. Just a bad taste and some thing else... that same sense of hopelessness she had felt earlier. A hand at her neck massaged slightly as she stayed bent and she felt the warmth that he gave her, shivering involuntarily.

His voice was gentle now. "We'll get you back to Atlantis, you can tell your story then. Don't talk for now... you're exhausted and ill... let me look after you." And with that he swung her into his arms as much to help her as give her some measure of privacy from the barrage of questions that would suddenly be turned on her in the next few minutes. Upon entering the settlement, his eyes sought Sam's first and he gave her a private unspoken message with just a look, indicating that they would leave for Atlantis now... and that he needed to talk to her urgently. Quick on the uptake, Sam rallied the searchers around and thanked them, quickly following John, Ronon and Nicole to a jumper, feeling as though a subtle change in power was about to happen in Atlantis. Feeling her control shift just a little. Jack had been digging into the background of the man in Nicole's photos and he was getting closer to the group behind him and what he had learnt so far, had put more than just a small measure of respect into what Nicole was going to have to deal with. A shadow group more powerful than the President of the United States. A shadow group made up of nationals from all countries opposed to the stargate programme, who wanted that money spent on something else... weapons.

And now she held the key in her own little corner of the universe. A tiny photographer, who at the moment was nestled in the arms of her first in command. The woman who could bring them down if she chose to do so. And if she chose to do so, Sam would support her every inch of the way.

Yes, the shift in power had been a subtle one but Nicole now held all the cards.


	23. Chapter 23 Aftermath

CHAPTER 23 – AFTERMATH

Carson simply shook his head in resignation as John led a battered and bleeding Nicole into the infirmary, with Sam following along behind. Nicole had not spoken in the jumper and Sam, casting concerned glances in her direction had seen the inner turmoil and wondered what had happened out there. She knew from John that contact had been made, and knew it was likely that Nicole had been threatened somehow, and the very fact that she was not talking indicated to Sam that she had been told to keep silent. She would not put her in a position of having to choose... not just yet. She needed to set up a safe area for them to talk, away from prying eyes and ears, somewhere Nicole could feel as though she was not putting herself or anyone else in danger.

"I'm not even going to ask lass... really Colonel? You couldn't keep her out of trouble for more than one day? So far you hold the record for visits to the infirmary, and this young lady here is likely going to top that..."

He shook his head again, but his professional eye was going over her with a fine tooth comb, noting the pallor of her skin and the haunted look in her eyes. He knew that something was going down, and knew that it was likely top secret and he would not be made privy to it unless he was invited. And that was fine with him. He'd do his job, keep her as healthy as he could and patch her up. But that didn't stop him from softening his touch as he tended to her cuts hoping that she had the strength to get through what she needed to do.

Carson was no fool. He watched as a piece of paper was passed between Sam and John and saw John's imperceptible nod as he read it. Saw his rip the paper into tiny pieces and put it into his pocket. Whatever was going down was top secret and he felt more than just a little unease. And hoped that these people were able to help the young woman who sat up on the hospital bed looking as though the weight of the world sat squarely upon those tiny shoulders.

"You can go now lass... you'll sleep better in your own bed.. for what's left of the night, anyway! Take a couple fo these pills now... they're painkillers... I understand you had a little too much of the good Athosian wine, and that stuff can kick you squarely in the teeth the next morning, so these little pills? Will give you a jump start on that headache, believe me." His smile was kind and she had relaxed under his touch, letting him patch her up and listening without responding, to his light chatter that had immediately put her at ease.

"I know you likely don't feel up to it, but I'd like you to eat, lass... before you go to bed. You've lost weight, and you can't afford to lose any more. You're thin enough as it is. Colonel Sheppard? Take her to the mess before you escort her back to her quarters, make sure she gets some food into her stomach." His voice was firm and his eyes as they made contact with John's, sent a clear message. _Look after her._ John nodded once. He fully intended to do just that.

"I'm taking her back to my quarters tonight... this morning..." he amended that, looking down at his watch and finding that it was almost 5am. "So, if anyone's got anything to say about that... say it now."

Carson shrugged and hid a smile and Sam quirked her eyebrows up at him. It was Nicole who gave him the biggest reaction and he smiled, glad to have brought some colour to her pale cheeks. Firstly she blushed, then a spark of anger lit her eyes.

"Please do not _assume_ that I will be spending the night in your quarters... Colonel Sheppard. I am quite comfortable in my own quarters _thank you_! I do not succumb to bullying..." Her voice faltered, remembering the conversation she had had with the man who had kidnapped. Bullying... that is exactly what she was having done to her at the moment, bullied into taking photos and exposing a top secret programme that some group had decided needed to be stopped. Her mind reeled again, and as gears clicked into place she wondered about their real reason for wanting the programme brought to task. Knew that there was an ulterior motive, and one that was perhaps just as bad or possibly even worse. She caught Sam Carter's eye and saw the knowledge that she held there. She knew. She knew what they wanted. And this same knowledge made her stomach plummet and she reached out to grab hold of John's arm, suddenly not so tough anymore. Damn, she did need him right now, and the idea of being alone in her quarters suddenly did not hold any appeal at all.

He watched the play of emotions across her face, and held her against him as she steadied herself.

"No one's bullying you Nic... you know that. I just want you to be safe. In my room... I know where you are and maybe that way? I can get some rest too... ok?"

She nodded, suddenly too tired to read the undercurrents that rattled around that room. Too tired to do anything more than lay down and sleep. Her stomach growled, and a small smile lit her face.

John tugged on her hand. "Food..." His own stomach growled in response and he led her out of the room. They'd talk in the privacy of his own quarters, but first they'd eat. It was almost a new day.

A large plate of toast and a cup of chamomile tea...colour had come back to her face and he studied her eyes as he pushed her down gently onto the bed and waited for her to speak. He scrubbed a hand down his face, feeling the rasp of his beard and grimaced. The previous morning's shower and shave seemed a long time ago, and he thought longingly of a hot shower now. Turning he went into the bathroom and turned it on, letting the steam drift out and into the living area, noting that when he came back out she was still sitting on the bed, her expression a little numb.

"Shower, miss... then bed. We can talk later. Ok?"

She didn't protest, just stumbled to her feet and moved past him into the bathroom, shutting the door behind her. He dug out a clean tshirt and some sweatpants and knocking on the door, he opened it carefully and placed the clean clothes on the floor, quickly closing the door again to keep the warm air in there. He moved out onto the balcony after that, letting the cool sea air move over him in cleansing waves and saw the lightening in the sky indicating that dawn would soon be here. A night of hell, the start of a new day. New directions and a new plan. Something had gone down last night and she now had her instructions.

The shower door opened and he turned, smiling a little as she came out. His sweatpants were rolled both at the hips and the leg bottoms, and still she seemed lost in them. His tshirt hung down to her knees and she looked like a lost orphan child, hair bundled up into a towel, small pale face and huge chocolate eyes. She just stood in the centre of the room, unsure what to do with herself, and he swore softly. Moving to her side, he took the towel off her hair, using it to dry it as much as he was able, and ran his fingers through it to get the tangles out. They he simply guided her toward the bed and pulling the covers back, eased her down onto it. Covering her back up he saw her eyelashes flutter as her head lay back on the pillow and he stood for a long time. A very long time. Just looking down at her. Finally he went to have his own shower,standing under the hot spray letting his thoughts spiral around inside his head. Sam's note had given a secure meeting place in one of the lower labs, one that was not in use by any of the science team. They would meet there in future, with a prearranged signal. No one outside of his team and Sam would know what was going on. For all intents and purposes, the group that was keeping tabs on her would think that she was going it alone. That is how they would play this out. For her safety and for his peace of mind.

When he finally came out of the shower after shaving, the sun was just peeking over the horizon and he spared it a moment's glance before turning his attention back to the woman in the bed. She slept soundly, curled up onto her side, knees pulled up. Her long dark hair curled over her pillow, and spilled over onto the pillow beside her. Fighting a small internal battle of his own, he shrugged his shoulders. Chair or bed? Proprietry dictated that he should take the chair, leave her the bed. But he needed to feel her warmth beside him, so he chose the bed, and pulling the covers back carefully, he eased in beside her bringing his large framed body in behind her so that her back tucked up securely against his front. He placed a hand gently over her hip, securing her body against his and heard her sigh as she subconsciously snuggled closer to his warmth. He smiled, closing his own eyes as sleep waiting on the edges of his own consciousness gave up the waiting game and decided that the rules had changed.

Dark hair beside dark hair on the pillow. Together in sleep as she invaded his dreams as well as his waking mind. And he sighed letting oblivion have it's way. A new day had begun, but for now? It could wait until he was ready to face it.


	24. Chapter 24 A time to reflect

CHAPTER 24 – A TIME TO REFLECT

Heat enveloped her, an almost invasive heat that suddenly moved and she rolled over – startled wide brown eyes looking into amused and sleepy hazel ones. Attached to a body that was wrapped around her, the source of all that heat. She struggled a little, lifting the blankets quickly to look down, and breathed a sigh of relief to find that they were both fully clothed.

She heard him chuckle in amusement. "Don't worry Nic – your virtue is still intact... just. I just needed to feel you close while I slept... after the last couple of days, I kinda get the impression that if I don't take a hands on approach with you, you'll up and disappear on me. Again."

Her blush slowly resided and she lifted her eyes so that she was looking into his. Eyes that were suddenly too close for comfort. And saw too damn much. He saw her wince slightly and rolled himself out of bed, going into the bathroom to grab a glass of water and a couple of the pills that Carson had left with him. Reaching down he waited until she had sat up slightly in the bed, her tousled hair and still sleep clouded eyes doing more than just his head in. Causing a reaction lower down that he painfully pushed away. For now.

"Here...' he said somewhat gruffly. "Lots of liquid and a couple of these pills. That headache will spiral out of control unless you do something about it now..."

"How did you know?" She took the water gratefully and her eyes warmed as they looked up at him. She saw the discomfort on his face and trying not to look in the direction of his discomfort, she fought a grin. Men would be men, and this one was no exception. His hormones pretty much ruled his emotions and while a small part of her... no, make that a rapidly increasing part of her... wanted to do something about it, she knew that she was not quite ready to take that next step. Another man in her bed after Ben... she wanted his memory to be just that when she took that next step. No ghosts invading what she knew would be a mind blowing experience. So? Until she could lay his ghost to rest, then she would keep him at a little distance.

"Aaah Nic – we've all been down the Ruus wine route... believe me. You do develop a little immunity to it as time goes on, but that first time? Oh boy... I remember mine fondly... or should I say, not so fondly!" He dropped down onto the bed beside her and peered at her scrapes and bruising.

"There's a little less skin left to actually damage, so maybe that's a good thing... I'm not doing such a good job of protecting you, am I?"

She put the glass down and lifted a hand to his face, smiling as he rubbed gently into her touch. He had shaved the night before, but a new growth had sprung up while he had slept and it rasped gently over her hand.

"I'm still alive, aren't I? I think that qualifies as a good job... so John. What's next? Where do we go from here? I'm used to making my own decisions, walking my own path, but Sam? She made me realise that a team is a good thing, that it's not so bad sharing the burden and the responsibility."

His hazel eyes were serious as he looked at her. She had come a long way in such a few short days. Independent to the point of annoyance, she had mellowed in the aftermath, enough that she would accept his help, and that of his team. He felt some relief, thinking that he would have a battle on his hands every step of the way which would make his job, and that of his team – that much harder. This way? They could work together and he could keep her safe.

"Sam's set up a secret meeting location, and only you, myself her and my team will have access to any of the information that you share. We'll keep you safe and help you do the job that they want you to do. I don't know what went down last night, but I have a fair idea. I know that you were likely threatened, and maybe your family as well." He raised his eyebrows at the look of alarm that had immediately blossomed in her eyes.

_Right on the mark, _ thought John. _Those bastards think that their bullying tactics will work on her... they couldn't be more wrong. They don't know me or my team. This woman is mine, or will be... no one touches her without going through me. I'll bring them down, and make sure she is safe._

They ate in comfortable silence in the mess. It was well past the lunch hour and they were the only ones there which suited John just fine. He could sit and just watch her, although he tried to be discreet, just a glance here and a look there while trying to appear to be engrossed in his own food. He sensed her slight withdrawal and knew that it had to do with some of the feelings that she was trying to sort through... and a lot to do with him. So he let the silence cocoon them, content to do so and when her mood changed to one of restlessness he looked at her with raised eyebrows, waiting.

"I need to be by myself for a while..." She silenced his impending protest with a look. "I have to show them that I am attempting to do what was asked of me... and I do want to be alone, just for a while. I'm not in any danger from them..." again that look when he appeared about to interupt and he fell silent, just watching and waiting. "... as long I do what they ask, and I need to show them that I am not involving anyone else. Let me go off alone... just for a couple of hours. I'll stay nearby, go out on the piers, do some outdoor shots... please?" Her eyes when they looked at him were pleading, and he couldn't bring himself to say no. Yet found it hard to agree. Those moments apart, he would worry. Until the danger was over. He would worry.

"On the conditon that we fit you out with a radio. Contact at all times, agreed? And any sign of trouble? You hit that radio and one of us will be there in minutes. Understood?" His voice was brusque and held no room for disagreement and she nodded her head quickly. She needed his trust and he was giving it and in return she would give him hers.

She moved swiftly to her feet and paused behind his chair, uncertain. Then, as if making a decision, she reached down and rested her chin lightly on the top of his head and wrapped her arms, albeit it a little stiffly, around his neck and leaned into him. She didn't see him close his eyes and didn't hear the soft groan, but she felt the racing of his heart and reaching around with her mouth, she kissed him on the cheek then pulled away before he could change his mind. Her cameras and lose herself in the beauty and solitude behind her lens. At the moment? That was where she needed to be.

Radio fitted and cameras slung over her shoulder, she felt the lifting of the weight that sat somewhat heavily on her shoulders. The sun was shining, sun? She guessed it was a sun - more or less the same body of heat and energy around which their own planets revolved. The heat was different, not as intense and she squinted up at the sky and knew that they were a further distance from this sun than earth was from it's own. Still, it radiated warmth and that was what she needed right now, to combat the chill of the previous night that had seeped under her skin, replaced during the early hours of the morning by the heat of John's body as it enclosed her in it's warmth. That same warmth had left, fled on the wings of her own banishment and she smiled a little, remembering her first thought when she had rolled over to look into those warm hazel eyes. Lust, oh yeah. In spades. It had immediately heated her body and that same body had almost betrayed her and had her reaching for that welcoming warmth and that smooth roll into oblivion that making love with that man would bring. Soon. When Ben's ghost was no longer between them.

She lifted her face to the sun, unaware that she was being watched by the same man who had dragged her blindfolded through the dark last night. Perched at the top of one of the high towers that Atlantis boasted, he held his small binoculars against his eyes and breathed a sigh of relief. She was alone, and with her cameras which indicated that she had not passed on what she had learnt to the Colonel. If she had, there was no way he would have let her out of his sight. He didn't want to see her hurt. Independent contractor, yes. But held firm in the tight bindings by fears of his own. It was a complicated chain of command and he was a small fish at the bottom of an extremely large pond and his only loyalty was to his own secrets which he no longer held guard over. He would try and make sure she followed his instructions, ensuring she didn't get harmed and his secrets remained his own.

Unaware, she lifted her camera and caught the shafts of light that rippled across the waters and turning, she centred the brilliant spires of Atlantis in the small lens that told it's own story. Click. Captured for posterity. An alien landscape captured for the world to see. Pausing a little as the brilliance of the light reflected in crystalline brilliance upon the polished surfaces of the building, she pulled the camera back from her eye and became the viewer - saw the intricacies of the structure not built by humans as she knew them. Built by a race of people who knew so much more. And so much less. Exposing this city to her world? Where would that take them as a people? It would not bring them peace, but would create a panic that would not be contained. She sighed. Truth. Sometimes a difficult thing to fathom and sometimes a difficult thing to get across. And who got to decide what was fact and what was fiction. The lens returned to her eye and she moved around, resolution now in her posture. The pictures she would take. Yes, for the world to see. But for the right reasons, not the wrong ones.

He had checked on her from time to time, not content to leave her entirely to her own devices. But he had watched from a distance, maintaining that privacy she seemed so set on keeping and seen the contentment on her face as she had succumbed to the magic behind her lens. When the sun had started to dip in the sky, he had gathered some food, a blanket and joined her out on the pier, where she now sat, resting lightly against a rail and gazing pensively out at sea. She had smiled when she saw him, sensing his presence before she heard him and laughed outright when she saw the picnic basket in his hand.

"If the girl doesn't go to food, bring food to the girl... nice philosophy, Colonel Sheppard..."

He sat down beside her. "So...?"

"So..."

"That's it? You're not gonna tell me how it went?"

"A picture says a thousand..."

"Yeah, yeah... I've heard that one. Now I want to hear you. Tell me. Did you find your picture?"

She knew what he meant. "Yeah, John. I found it. Magic, always... it's there if you look for it, and sometimes if you don't. Tell me then, how did your afternoon go? Find any new life sucking aliens for me to photograph. You know... for posterity."

He couldn't help the laughter that escaped him. Her dry humour was infectious and soon she was laughing with him. At themselves, and at the situation they were now in.

"No... nothing like that. Sam wants a meeting later... "

"Oh... secret handshake stuff. Code words in the night?"

"Yeah..."

She nodded down to the basket. "So? What's for dinner?"

"Well... I deliberately left out the wine..."

She touched her head lightly acknowledging the headache that had just returned in dull waves. "Good idea..."

"...and included a bit of ... everything, really. So, eat. Ok?"

The sun dipped experimental fingers below the horizon and once more she brought her camera up, unable to stop herself, then swung it around, capturing the face of the man beside her as he stared first at the descending ball of fire, then at her - and captured the hunger in his eyes. She lowered her lens slowly, feeling a little like a voyeur, witnessing emotions so raw that it was almost an intrusion to capture them on camera. A crumb of her bread that had been resting on her knee fell into the water below, and this was a boiling motion of moving water, a quick image of sharp teeth and the bread was gone... and the moment broken as startled laughter erupted out of her.

"Friend or foe?"

"Well... I wouldn't be dipping my toes in there... just saying..." He stood up and reached for her hand, pulling her up beside him. The sun completed it's path and exhausted from another day of spreading light amongst the dark, it simply sank gracefully below the horizon and the last ray of light before it disappeared captured the man dropping his head lightly toward the woman as a connection was made, forged in the near darkness of a foreign world.


	25. Chapter 25 Battle plans

CHAPTER 25 – BATTLE PLANS

_The gangs all here_. That somewhat irreverent thought entered her mind when she and John found themselves the last ones arriving for the meeting in the laboratory that was hidden in the bowels of one the Lantian towers. Her fingers itched to take her camera and capture the expressions on the faces of the people in that secret room. The dark play of shadows against the walls, eerie and somehow even more so, given the clandestine reason that they were meeting down here. The expressions ranged from the casually dark - Ronon's only facial movement was the restless roll of his eyes as he took in every corner of that gloomy laboratory - to the somber. Teyla's face was serious and her eyes were slightly unfocused making Nicole wonder where she had to mentally pull herself out of. Rodney's showed impatience and it was his face that Nicole found the most fascinating, longing to capture his restless energy and self absorption on camera. Sam's face did not warrant much study on Nicole's part. She kept a professional front most times and Nicole wondered if the camera would capture the woman that hid beneath that calm, professional exterior. Perhaps one day Sam would allow her to try.

The sheaf of papers in Sam's hands rattled impatiently and John settled himself negligently against a counter, while Nicole took the seat near where he rested.

"General O'Neill's been busy, boys and girls. This?" She held up the sheaf of paper. "This is the result of hours of searching, trolling through public and closed records and calling in more favours than he probably had to start with. The result? We're getting close to the barrier they're keeping tight around them. Close, but not there yet. I can tell you this much... and this made for some interesting reading... it's all about the money and what they want to do with it. Weapons. Of mass destruction. They want to channel the funds earmarked for the stargate programme, into a new weapons platform programme that whispers around Washington have been picking up. On strictly unofficial channels. All roads lead back to Rome... but the doors are closed for now and Jack's trying his best, but coming up against more brick walls that anything. He'll keep trying. We know the why... the who is proving to be the difficult part. As we knew it would be. Questions?"

Her tall body leant back against the wall, eyes bright and alert as she watched the faces around the room, read the understanding she saw there. Ronon and Teyla did not need an earth background to understand the implications of what she had said. Weapons of mass destruction on any world heralded disaster.

"Well... crap. The day just went from bad to worse..." John grunted this response and pushed himself away from the counter. "So, by exposing the stargate to the public they hope to shut down the funding we receive for this, and other space orientated projects? That's the gist of it?"

Sam nodded, watching him carefully, knowing that he would make the connection.

"The President know about this?"

"Not that Jack can ascertain. He does know this. The group is comprised of multi national 'secret' leaders. And some military personnel. High ranking military, who are acting as advisors for the weapons platform. So we're talking global conspiracy... not just the good old USA. That makes this a whole lot harder."

"That would be an understatement Sam... more to the point, it makes it damn near impossible to shut down. If many countries are involved, then just how sanctioned is it? And who do they have in their no doubt very deep pockets. Those not on the payroll, will be blackmailed, such as Nicole here. And that brings us to our next item on the agenda. Nic? It's time to tell us exactly what went down last night. I gave you your space today, but we need to know what's at stake. Ok?"

She sighed, knowing that it would come to this and the knowing wasn't going to make this any easier. She began from the moment she was roughly grabbed as she exited the bathroom and tried to ignore the growing anger that John did not even try to hide. Her eyes flickered constantly to his hands, where his fist - resting lightly against his muscular thigh, began to clench and unclench.

"When I find that bastard, he'll feel my hands around his throat... I promise you that much." John choked out his response, his fist now a permanent shape at the end of his arm and he tapped it none too lightly against his thigh in a rhythmic pattern that Nicole found herself drawn to. Reaching out she put her hand over his tense one, and she felt it still momentarily under the pressure of her own hand and she heard him take a deep breath.

"A month?" he continued. "I'm surprised they gave you that long. That means something... that time frame. Something must be going down... maybe a decision is being made or a big weapons deal comes onto the board. Take that back to the General, Sam... factor in the time frame and maybe with his ear to the ground in Washington... you know how rumours fly in that city."

"Onto it John... and Nicole? I've already got cover for your family. I suspected they would use that as a threat and your parents and brother are under discreet guard, and if necessary, we'll take them in and hide them for a while."

Nicole was restless and pushing herself away from the chair she turned to Sam. "Maybe I should go back to earth. Make sure... they are ok. If anything happens to them because of me... I couldn't live with myself. Also, Ben's parents... I want them protected also."

John's voice was adamant. "You can't go back to earth. Not gonna happen. You have to stay here and appear to be doing exactly as they asked. Stick to the agenda and give them no reason to doubt you. Your safety is paramount. We've got a month to smoke them out. You're safer here, than on earth."

Rodney had been silent up until now, occasionally flicking his hands across the keyboard of his hand held computer, but Nicole knew that he was doing some research of his own. He pulled his gaze upward now and she saw sympathy in his eyes as he first looked at her, then addressed John.

"What can I do Sheppard?"

_So she's gotten under your skin too, Rodney_... John knew that Rodney was generally self centred and focused on his own problems and often oblivious to anyone elses. The very fact that he was offering to do his part was testiment to the fact that she was ok in his books and John mentally rose the sometimes taciturn scientist up a notch in his estimation.

"I want to find that bastard who took her last night. He may only be a small player, but if I can get him alone in a cell for an hour... I'll have the information I need." Steel laced his voice now and Nicole gave a small shiver. He wore the face of the soldier now, hard and a little cold and she was not sure that she liked this side of the man. But knew that it was an integral part of who he was and if she wanted to spend any time with him and even entertain thoughts of being a part of his life in any way, she would have to accept this side.

"Rodney, you're like a dog with a bone. Find him. Go through all the personnel files, again and again if you have to. He's here in the city somewhere, watching her. He may be flying under the radar at the moment, but the instant he raises his head, I want you onto him. You up for that, Rodney?"

Happy to have something to do, the scientist nodded and sat back in his chair, a thoughtful look on his face. "His full personnel file is likely blocked and we'll only be able to see what he wants us to see. Want me to try out one of my new programmes... a little back door trick I've been working on."

"Do whatever you need to Rodney, and maybe best if we aren't privy to the methods you use... the same applies to you, John. If you find this guy and 'question' him - then I don't want to know... officially. If you get my drift..."

"Loud and clear Sam."

"Give me an hour with him Sheppard..." The big man finally spoke up and the others looked at him in alarm. Ronon's voice was laced with menance and fascinated, Nicole stared into his dark eyes and he looked back at her, unblinking.

_They'll do this for me_! It was a humbling thought and she wondered again at the comraderie she found in that room this night, this team spirit that had never been a part of her life, either personally or professionally. What a wonderful liberating feeling to lay it all out for others to sort through and take a piece of. No longer needing to hold all the cards and make all the decisions.

"You get the second hour Ronon... the first hour is mine. Teyla? I need you to talk to your people. See if they saw anything last night. A man holding a pretty woman by the arm, tightly. Someone must have seen something... anything."

She nodded, happy to have a task to complete. And this was the note that concluded the meeting, heralded by Sam pushing away from the wall and laying a gentle hand on Nicole's shoulder as she moved past her.

"It may seem an insurmountable barrier right now, but believe me Nicole. We've seen worse, and we've been up against nastier enemies than these... wait until you meet the Wraith... Humanity is all it's forms is preferable to sitting down to lunch with the Wraith."

Rodney's parting comment brought a smile to Nicole's face.

"Yeah... especially when you ARE the lunch..."


	26. Chapter 26 Moments in the dark

CHAPTER 26 – MOMENTS IN THE DARK

The room emptied and Nicole suddenly found she didn't have either the desire nor the strength to move. It had been a disjointed day. Beginning with the return from the mainland in the early hours of the morning, to the fragile moments of solidarity as she shared a picnic with a handsome Colonel on the pier of a city in another galaxy. And in between? She had woken up more or less in the arms of that same man, wanting something that she had not wanted for a long time.

"Coming?" He stood at the doorway, looking back at her with a questioning look in his eyes.

"Not tired... yet. What's there to do around this place at night?"

"Depends... we have a tv/film room, games room... what do you feel like doing? I'd suggest a workout at the gym, but if Carson catches you, he'll make your life a living hell. And take my word for it... he will catch you. He always does..."

"Sounds like you speak from experience... movie sounds good. I don't suppose you get anything in the 'new release' category out here..."

John laughed, taking care to ensure the door shut securely behind them and keeping his eyes discreetly on the lookout for anyone that should not be down on these levels, especially at this time of night. He steered them toward the mess first, needing coffee and found Rodney had already stationed himself at one of the tables, several containers of blue jello lined up in front of him, a puzzled look in his eyes.

"Rodney... I'm not even going to ask. You gonna come and watch a movie. Or are you gonna stare at that jello all night...?"

Sipping the hot liquid, John raised his eyebrows at Nicole, who had helped herself to a cup of her own and was looking a little longingly at the containers of jello in front of Rodney. Rodney caught her look and shrugging his shoulders, indicated to her that she could take one.

"Blue jello Rodney? A personal favourite I take it..." She shook her head at him, but John quickly picked up one of the containers and waggled it in front of her.

"We'll take it to go... grab a spoon and maybe you'll share it with me. Unless there's popcorn... mmmm..."

The tv/movie room held an array of comfortable chairs and there was a small group already assembled, huddled around a group of dvd's that were stacked somewhat haphazardly along one shelf that lined a side of the room. The collection was a reasonably sized one, added to over the past two years by personnel who had taken earth leave and brought back some of the new releases when they returned. Inserting her small frame between bickering engineers, they had looked down at her first in surprise, then with interest and John had quickly made his way over to the small group, placing a somewhat proprietory hand at her waist and watched as the interest in the two men's eyes had quickly faded.

_Take that gentlemen. Branded by my touch, so back off. Yeah._

Unaware of the male testosterone game that was being played out under her nose, Nicole picked up the top DVD and flipped it over, reading the synopsis and laughing out loud.

"I don't suppose anyone noticed that all these DVD's are rather... male... orientated." She indicated the title that she held up.

"Lethal Weapon 1. Lethal Weapon 2... oh, and just for a bit of variety... Lethal Weapon 3. Anyone see a thread of sameness running through these titles... hmmm?"

John's hand tightened slightly at her waist and she yelped slightly as he found her ticklish spot.

"Yeah well... that's the guys pile. And us guys? We like to... shoot … stuff."

Nicole rolled her eyes. "And the girls pile?"

A disgusted roll of his own eyes and he indicated the other shelf and she moved away from his hand and picked up a DVD from that shelf.

"Now that's more like it... mmmm... Channing Tatum. I could watch him all night... shall we?"

John's eyes narrowed and he plucked it quickly out of her hand and tossed it back on the shelf. She shrugged her shoulders, grinning a little cheekily up at him. "So... Lethal Weapon it is then..."

She eased down beside him on a chair, overstuffed and comfortable and curled up beside the man who held out the container of blue jello and a spoon. The movie drifted over her and she watched without watching, just enjoying the sound of something familiar and the laughter of the others in the room. She felt the warmth of John's body beside her own and smiled to herself when she felt his breathing change and the way his head rested heavily against her shoulder. One testosterone filled male had fallen alseep.

Her eyes flickered around the room, keeping her eyelashes lowered slightly so that she could see without being seen. She had felt eyes on her more than once since the movie had started, and not wanting to send John into overprotective mode, she had kept that information to herself, surreptitiously taking in the faces of all the men in that room, suddenly overwhelmed with the knowledge that the man who had kidnapped her, was in this room right now. Watching her.

_Gotcha!_ At last she caught him – staring at her and not at the movie, and she kept her lashes lowered, watching him carefully through the veil of long hair that fell across her face. For all intents and purposes it looked as though she had fallen asleep also, resting lighting against the side of the chair, while John's head rested against her shoulder, unfortuntately her still bruised shoulder, which was now throbbing a little painfully from the weight of the Colonel. But she would put up with the discomfort rather than move him. He had to be exhausted, she knew that he had had even less sleep than her over the past few days.

Her thoughts tumbled through her mind. She had committed his features to memory, knew she could find him again if she needed to, but a part of her was coming up with a plan. One she knew that the man sleeping soundly beside her, would not approve of. She could corner him herself... without putting anyone else at risk. Set a little trap for him and hope he fell into it.

She thought on the fly – that was how she had always gone through life, and she didn't stop to think it through further. Action was more her style, and easing herself carefully from underneath the body of the Colonel, she rested his head back against the side of the chair, making sure that he remained asleep and pushed up off the chair, taking care not to look at the man in the chair on the other side of the room. Not looking back, she quickly left the tv room, looking for all intents and purposes, as though she was just going for a toilet break. She caught Ronon's eye just before she left and she gave her head a slight shake indicating that she was ok and to stay where he was. She saw the flare of suspicion and watched as he attempted to tamper it down and breathed a very small sigh of relief. She'd not have any problems with him, at least.

She had an exceptional memory and had taken note of the many rooms and utility areas on this and other levels during her tour of the city. She knew where the weapons were kept, and she pushed herself into a run as soon as she left the room, heading straight for the weapons room. There was a tiny burst of regret as she ran. She knew that John would be furious when he found out. The alternative? Wake him up and tell him who the man was and risk losing him again. Likely John would see it another way – his military mind would no doubt work differently to hers, but in the heat of the moment, she sought answers and demanded action. She'd deal with the fall out after all this went down.

Not even sure he had followed her, she ducked into the utility room that held the weapons and feeling more than just a little out of her depth, she glanced wildly around the room. She had fired weapons before... hell, a photojournalist in any hot zone knew how to handle at least one sort of weapon, but these ones? They did not look all that familiar until she spotted the Beretta, a weapon that she had fired before with a measure of success. She heard a noise outside the room and grabbed the first weapon that came to hand. The one she had seen John clip to his vest and remembered that he had called it a P90.

Hefting it experimentally in her hand, she had no idea whether it was loaded or not, and decided that the weapons stored here would be likely ready to grab in an emergency and quickly moved to the side of the door. It sprung open and she bit down the yelp that came to her lips and found herself facing the wall of muscle that was Ronon Dexx, who wore a less than amused look on his face.

"You going somewhere with that?" His glance flicked down to the weapon she held and she let it drop slightly.

Her voice was a whisper. "He was in the tv room, Ronon. Watching me. I wanted to try and corner him..."

Ronon's voice was incredulous. "On your own? With that? Sheppard's gonna kill you..."

"I may just wait until I have an explanation..." The dry tone was carefully controlled and she knew that he struggled to keep his anger in check. John stood in the doorway, hazel eyes now stormy with suppressed anger and she carefully placed the weapon back where she had found it. Clamping her lips together in annoyance she looked up at the two men who looked down at her with matching disapproving expressions and held her head up and decided to take the high road. The one that led straight out of that room.

She simply pushed past them and kept going. She was going to find him herself and if her two bodyguards wanted in on the action, then they could damn well keep up with her.

She moved swiftly down the hallway hearing the exasperated groan from the Colonel who was a little slow to push out of the room and ease himself into her jet stream.

"Damn it Nicole... would you wait. Who is he? You go off after him alone and you'll be feeling my hand on your backside. What the hell do you think you're doing?"

She didn't reply and it wasn't until she felt the sudden tug on her arm as he caught up to her that she allowed herself to look up at him. She stopped suddenly in the hallway then, as memories flooded through her and she read something in his eyes. Tears flooded her own eyes.

"You think I killed him... that I was responsible for his death... you think that I did something stupid and rash... without thinking and that he would still be alive if it wasn't for me... I can see it in your eyes..."

Shock registered on his face and he gentled his touch.

"No... Nic... No... that's what you're thinking... don't put this back on me. I don't know your full story, and I won't until you tell me. You're reading your own guilt on my face... the guilt you carry that you're alive and he's not. And if you think you might have made a rash decision then? Even the scales... make the right one now. Let me help. Let Ronon help. You go off alone with a weapon that you have no idea how to fire, and you're done. We can't help you. It'll be too late and I couldn't live with that... the same way you have to live with the death of Ben. You getting that yet?"

His voice softened as he saw the sorrow on her face and knew that her 'then' had become superimposed on her 'now' and in her mind she wanted somehow to balance the scales for what had happened when Ben had died.

"You can't bring him back Nic, and you don't have to feel guilty that you're still alive. But you can make his death mean something. Do the right thing. Bring these guys down, but do it the right way. With us backing you up."

She backed up a little, that cornered animal look on her face again, and tried to fight the disappointment and the guilt and lost the battle. She shook her head, and turning, took flight as she had always done. Running away from responsibility and pain and everything else that had gone wrong in her life in the past two years. Not realising that she was running away from the one thing that had gone right.

He didn't think he had the strength to go after her.


	27. Chapter 27 Fight or flight?

CHAPTER 27 – FIGHT OR FLIGHT

_Run, just go... faster. _The litany ran through her head and she did just that. Lost in the memories that always sat below the surface, and trying to grasp the new mire she now found herself sinking slowly into. Eyes wide and staring, she moved with little grace down the everpresent dark hallways, in areas of the city where lighting had not been accessed due to non use. No idea where she was or where she would end up she kept going until with a cry she finally stumbled and fell, landing awkwardly on her ankle and rolling onto to her bruised shoulder. She would not allow the tears to come, allowed instead, the numbing calm to settle over her and resolutely pushed away the face of the man who she had left in the 'then' and the one who waited for her in the 'now'.

She knew that it wasn't John who dropped down onto the floor beside her, heard his own gasping breath and knew that he had run hard to keep up with her.

"I don't know if I can do what you want me to do... I need to take control of my life again, and this? This, is making me feel as though everything is spiralling out of control I know you don't care... I know you only follow me around to protect yourself... but I don't have anything left to give..."

He didn't speak at first, and if she had turned around she would have seen a look of pain cross his face. Slanting her eyes sideways, she saw him in profile and saw that he kept his eyes down on the floor, his posture as weary as her own was.

"I don't have a choice... and soon? Neither will you. They're watching your family. Your brother? I understand he has a little boy... cute, blonde hair. Oh God..."

Her own fear spiralled at the mention of her nephew but she pushed it down a little when she heard the pain in his voice.

"Damn it, you have to fight them. Don't let them win. Whatever they have over you, fight them. I'll help you. Together... there must be others, others who don't want to do their bidding anymore. Why can't we simply refuse in one voice. What the hell can they do then?"

He dropped heavily onto the floor fully and she saw the same hopelessness on his face that she must have had on hers.

"If they expose me Nicole, it's not just me that is affected. I carry the secrets that affect many, and most of them are innocent people. I can't give you details... I won't give you details, for your own protection. But if I could stand up and simply say no – don't you think I would? Contrary to what I led you to believe... I'm no mercenary. I'm just a foolish man who made a foolish decision a long time ago. And now I pay the price."

She pushed herself onto her knees and rested her hands on his knees, trying to get her point across. "I suspect you've already paid more than your price."

As though making a decision she pushed herself to her feet and held out a hand to the man who still sat on the ground.

"I'm Nicole Harmon... pleased to meet you."

Surprised, he looked up at her and knew what she was trying to do. New beginnings. He sighed and wished he had the strength that she had, and decided that if he was going down, then it would be doing the right thing.

His own hand gripped hers tightly. "Pleased to meet you Nicole Harmon. I'm Robert Craig and perhaps you and I can become friends."

Her response was soft. "I'd like that Robert."

She let his hand go and backed up to the wall, suddenly exhausted. Sliding down the wall she brought her knees up and dropped her chin so that it rested atop them. Pausing for just a moment, he slid down beside her, not touching, but too weary himself to leave the dark hallway. He knew that they would have company soon and like Nicole, he was sick of running. Time to make the right choice.

She keyed her radio and said quietly into it once she was acknowledged. "John? Can you come and get me..." Her voice was soft and she didn't tell him where she was. She knew that he would find her and closing her eyes she rested her head back against the wall and waited.

Weapon drawn he found the hallway where she waited, his own senses had told him that she was not alone, and that he should proceed with caution. He wasn't prepared for what he found. Two people, weary beyond words, their exhaustion from more than just the fight or flight through the halls of Atlantis.

He spared a glance at the man who sat close, but not touching and knew immediately who he was. He saw the resolution in his eyes and admiration rose unwillingly for the fiesty, stubborn and out of control woman who lay her head back against the wall and watched him with wary eyes. Waiting for his reaction to the way she had just left.

He took a moment to gather his thoughts and knew that his anger was leaching out of him in an ever increasing stream. How could he be angry with someone who brought light into a dark room, without knowledge of how she did it?

"I'll give you what I can... it may not be much, but I'm done. I'll take whatever punishment you want to dish out, but in return for what I tell you, I need you to help me... there are some people who don't deserve what will go down, once they know I'm no longer on the payroll..."

John was a fair man and he nodded once at Robert. "You'll have your say and we'll listen and if you come up with something usable, then yeah... we'll help you in return. That's only fair. But you lay a hand on this woman again? I'll tear you from limb to limb. That's not a threat. That's my promise. Got that?"

"Loud and clear, Colonel."

"You understand I have to lock you up? And you'll be interogated, but not the way it would have gone down had you not turned yourself in."

He didn't wait for Robert's reply, but keyed his ear mike and requested an escort of two marines to take their prisoner to the cells.

She did not speak while they waited and neither did he. John simply stood and watched her from time to time, running his hand repeatedly through his tousled hair, a thousand beginnings to a thousand sentences running through his head, but ready to impart none. Finally the marines came and Robert was escorted away, but not before he spared Nicole a sympathetic glance and an even longer glance at the colonel. He saw the game that these two played and didn't envy either of them.

He finally spoke. "How can one woman make me feel so damn much in the space of a few short days... hmmm?" I've done the spectrum babe, from sheer delight to overwhelming anger, and a lot of other stuff in between. Good stuff, but bad stuff too. My head is being done in, I don't know whether I'm upside or down, most of the time when I'm around you. Do you get that? Do you get the way I'm feeling most of the time?"

His voice was harsh and she winced slightly, knowing that she deserved whatever he was about to throw her way.

"I don't think you're ready to have any sort of relationship..."

His voice had softened slightly and these words had a veil of red dropping down over her already overstimulated senses. She pushed herself up from the ground, wincing as weight was placed on a tender ankle and mentally questioning whether she would ever feel pain free again.

"Wasn't that exactly what I tried to tell you... the first day I met you? And did you listen? No... you kept coming at me, guns blazing, all rounds firing. I told you damn it... you knew the crap that had gone down in my life, and still... you wanted to have your shot. Well... hell... guess what? That shot hit it's mark... ok? I'm starting to feel something I haven't felt in a long time... since..."

She dragged a hand through her own hair and turned, not wanting him to see the tears that were threatening again. Tears that she thought were finished for now. She had done her crying a year ago, and when finally she had dragged herself out of that depression that had enveloped her after Ben's death she had told herself that life was there to live and she would live it for herself and Ben. The only way she knew how.

"... since the only man I ever loved died because I screwed up... ok! He told me it wasn't safe that day. Told me that there were insurgents in the area. He had a source who had been helping us to get the information we needed, and this intell? Was spot on. I told Ben not to be weak... take a chance. We'd have the story of a life time. Some big diamond smuggling case about to blow wide open... yeah, well, I blew it wide open all right. Wrote the story of my life. But at what cost? I lost the one good thing in my life... because I didn't listen..."

She wasn't finished. "I won't make that same mistake again Colonel. I won't get another killed because I can't follow orders or listen to advise. I am, what I am. I'm impulsive, and when I get a story I want to follow, I go... without impunity, without thought and with total disregard for rules and protocol. It's who I am...and I know it's not who you are."

It was so fast he almost missed the moment she was simply not there. He turned around, having needed a moment to simply drop his face into his hands and try to shut out the conflicting emotions and when he turned back, to tell her... to tell her what? He didn't know... But she was gone. Had run again, as she would always run, even though she had told herself that it was time to stop. The instincts of a wild animal and while a part of him craved to tame her, the sensible part, the part that made him a good soldier? Told himself to simply let her walk away.


	28. Chapter 28 A new direction

CHAPTER 28 – A NEW DIRECTION

The next forty eight hours passed with dizzying speed. He did not see Nicole very much during that time and he had gotten to know Robert Craig better than he would have liked. The man held nothing back... everything was documentated. Meetings dating back two years, names of the lower echelon players and key locations where others like Nicole were being blackmailed to bring both the stargate and the space programme down to it's knees. Compiling the data, Sam and John realised that this multi national group wanted total domination over earth and sought to control all countries on a utililarian basis through eventual fear and withdrawal of basic needs. They would hold all the cards and would effectively bring the world as they knew it, to it's knees.

Robert had cautioned them. "This is a far reaching plan Colonel. You can't chip away at it. You need to put all your land mines into place first, before pulling the firing pins. Bring the whole house of cards tumbling down at once. Or else? It'll simply rebuild itself. It is that powerful. You've got to leave everything in place. That photo expose holds a major key to their plan, because once it hits the news stands they have her booked for national TV – on all continents. She's a pawn in their game, but an important one, and if you pull her from the game now, you'll lose the moves that have been made to date and you'll have nothing. They'll close ranks so fast that you'll never get near them. They only way is to keep the game in play. I am their only contact here at the moment and I can control what goes in and out information wise."

John watched as Robert paced around the cell. He had begun to have grudging respect for this man, regardless of the things he had done over the years.

"What sort of danger is she in. I need to know."

"If she does her job Colonel... none. They need her. They chose her for this because of what happened last year with Ben, her partner. After he was killed, she went darkside a little and published an amazing story about the diamond trade in South Africa. It blew the lid off a lot of big groups around the world, and took a lot of bad people down. She got into the hearts of a lot of people and became a celebrity in her own right. Credibility. That's what they need to bring this down. And their plans for her don't stop there. They want her as a front person for their future publicity... for the weapons platform. They think she'll sell the story in such a way that they will become the heros... God complex and all that... these guys have it in spades."

Tired now, he rested back against the bars, watching the wary gaze of the colonel, whose eyes had barely left him.

"My advice Colonel? Let her do the story, the whole thing, exactly as they want it. Then gather your information and bring them down. The story? Keep it on the backburner once it's done. Who knows? Nicole will spin a twist on it that puts it in the light that it deserves... and maybe... just maybe... the world is ready to know about what goes on out here. Let the story run, the way it should be run. People do deserve to know what goes on out here, because there's more good than bad, and with someone like Nicole? She gets that, she saw that from the first day... and you put a story like this in her hands? You guys will come out as heroes, and I guarantee... if the world was even a tiny bit ready to accept... _this..._, then she would be the one the make sure that they did."

It was Sam who had shaken her head. "The people that run this programme... Home Office... the Military... they'd never allow exposure like that. There will always be someone to block it. We'll always be a shadow group of players and our family and friends back on earth... they'll never know what it is we really do. That's what we signed up for, and while I see your point, and agree that if it could be done, then Nicole would certainly be the one to do it... we'd never sell that idea to our higher ups."

"There could be a way...if you let me contact some people back in Washington. I have contacts... ones that have nothing to do with... this. Good guys, and unfortunately, their names are on that list I was telling you about earlier.. they'd help in they knew the story. They'd find a way to get your higher ups agree to at least bring the story that Nicole is doing to a workable format, just in case. If they're not ready to run it yet, then one day... they will be. And it'll be ready to go, at the push of a button. Would you trust anyone else to do it?'

John brought Nicole's lovely face to mind, her determined brown eyes and the way she tilted her chin when she simply refused to accept someone elses idea. He could visualise her on a talk show, earnestly telling the world about this place and the way her eyes would sparkle as she described the feeling of flying through space. Described that moment when you stepped into the wormhole and just simply went from one place to another... light years away. If anyone could sell their story, could make the world believe that they were doing some good out here, then she could do it.

Sam watched John's face and knew what he was thinking. She had thought along the same lines, many times. NASA had talked of bringing in a sanctioned camera crew once, to document what they did out here, just in case... something went horribly wrong. It had never happened. Security was so tight that they had decided that it just couldn't happen and now? They were presented with the perfect alternative. A ready to go journalist whose credibility was already established in the world of international photojournalism. And she was already here.

A plan began to form in her mind and she suddenly couldn't wait to talk to Jack. He would help. And they would serve up both breakfast and dinner. Bring this group down and document the stargate programme. Fully sanctioned.

Robert had watched her and keep his smile hidden. He liked the lanky Colonel and admired the way she ran the base. Firm with administration, yet she was still a soldier and could hold her own on any battle field. He knew that General O'Neill and herself had a relationship of sorts and had a lot of respect for the General, having been involved in one of his Washington groups for a short time, in an effort to infiltrate himself into the stargate programme. He sought retribution now, and would only find peace once he had done his best to turn this around. He had people to protect and had now put that list of people in the hands of those who stood before him. Colonel John Sheppard and Colonel Samantha Carter. He hoped that they wouldn't let him down. Those people on the list were good people, and had been put there because they had been targetted by the Group as worthy players. Dirt could always be found under the cleanest rug, and made to look far worse than it was and Robert knew for a fact that the names on that list, some of them his friends, were not bad people.

"Sam...?" John's voice pulled her out of her reverie. He was ready to leave the cell and needed her attention. "You're gonna go for this, aren't you?" He didn't bother to censure his words in front of Robert. He wasn't going anywhere, and John knew enough about people to know who he could trust and who he couldn't.

"It makes sense John... and face it. Out here, when something makes sense, you run with it. She can help us, and if I sell the idea to Jack – he'll do his best to get it approved. I know that. You've seen the photos she's done so far. They're brilliant. Insightful, thoughtful and more than that. They show the truth. And the story she writes to go with them? It'll swing things our way, bring us out of the dark and into the light... for once. One day, John. One day, I want to work in the light."

He followed her out of the cell, needing caffeine and something else. Something he had been pushing down. He needed to see Nicole, breathe her scent and listen to her quiet voice. To be with her and simply... be.

"John?"

Sam's voice got his attention and he turned to see the questioning look in her eyes.

"What are you going to do about her... hmmm?"

She read him like a book, it had always been like that. But he guessed that was what made her an excellent base commander. She took the time to get to know her personnel, and more so her key personnel. She knew what made them tick, knew when they were off their game and simply knew... when things weren't right.

"Honestly, Sam? I have no idea. She's not ready... and now? We're playing a game of cat and mouse with a group of high rollers who could bring her down in a heartbeat if they even suspected she wasn't in the game. I need to protect her, that's my mandate here. But I can't push back the feelings that almost overwhelm me when I'm with her. Hence the distance these past couple of days."

"Has it worked?" Her voice held a hint of amusement as though she already knew the answer to that one.

"Not so much..."

"You'll work it out John. Unfortunately the job comes first... especially in this case because if either of you blow it? The effects are far reaching. You get that, I'm sure. So tread carefully John, but don't deny yourself if that is what you really want. What you both want."

"I know that Sam. I'll let fate take a hand for now... I can't keep throwing myself out there and have all this crap come down on me when she runs. She's got issues, hell, we've both got issues – and I don't know if either of us can get past those issues."

"If she makes you feel that much John... then don't throw it away. Just saying... I've been there, with Jack. Sometimes these things only come along a few times in your life, and if you toss it casually over your shoulder, you can't play catch up. I've seen you two together. There's sparks all right, but something else. Something like lego blocks that fit together. You have the right fit, John. And that doesn't happen often."

He gave a bark of laughter. "I'll take all that under advisement Sam. Speaking of said lego block, any idea where she is?"

"Out on a mission with Lorne...he was taking a science team to P2B340. Ancient ruins... it seemed a good photo opportunity."

The look on his face was priceless.


	29. Chapter 29 Protect and serve

CHAPTER 29 – PROTECT AND SERVE

Ancient ruins... hell. An uneasy feeling began in his stomach and pushed upward. That last mission he had taken her out on? A simple pilot and babysit job. Now, hadn't that gone well...

He burst into the control room and headed straight for the gate technician. "Has he made contact yet?"

Confused, the young gate technician swung around in his seat and met the blazing eyes of Colonel John Sheppard.

"Sir...?"

"Lorne. Has he made contact yet... since he left."

"Ah... no, sir. He's only be gone for an hour and not scheduled to report in for at least another two. Is something wrong, Sir?"

He was a little intimidated by the dark haired Colonel. His temper was sometimes a little mercurial and Airman Steven Truman, having only been in Atlantis for two weeks, held his breath as he waited to see whether the Colonel was going to explode.

He heard the whoosh of breath as the Colonel released his, and his own sigh of relief was almost imperceptible. Almost, but not quite.

"Sorry, airman. Didn't mean to jump down your throat. I'm just a little concerned... about the passenger he has with him."

"The photographer... Nicole Harmon? Sir? That story she wrote last year was amazing. Brought her a lot of fame, but also a few bad feelings amongst some of the groups in the diamond trade. She has a lot of guts doing what she did... especially after..."

John looked at the the young airman with interest. "You heard about all that?"

"Yes, sir. I met her once, at a convention... and she seemed... nice..."

"You mean she was … hot!"

"Yeah, sir... that too..."

"Hmmm... anyway, if you hear from Lorne, can you radio me? I'm just a little antsy with her out there under someone else's protection. Security detail over that particular package is mine."

"Acknowledged Colonel. As soon as a call comes in, I'll radio you. I can try and get a message to them, if you like? I don't know if he's in range, but it could be worth a shot?"

Interest sparked again in the Colonel's eyes. "Good thinking, Airman. Please..."

He activiated the radio, pleased to be able to do something for the Colonel. "Major Lorne, this is Atlantis. Come in, please."

The radio crackled, but there was no response and after trying several times, the young airman shrugged his shoulders and deactivated the radio.

"Sorry, Colonel. I'll have to wait until his scheduled check in time. I'll let you know as soon as he calls."

It was more than spidey senses that fingered their way down his spine. His connection to her was strong, and he knew that if there was trouble to be found, she'd damn well find a way to step right into the middle of it.

And when he got the call from the airman two hours later, he was running into the control room, Sam hot on his heels.

The airman's eyes were wide and a little frightened.

"Sir? Ma'am? That was Major Lorne... he lost connection. Said that they were under fire. They've been attacked by the Wraith..."

John barely had time to bite out an oath before activating his ear mike and calling his team together. He was in the jumper bay in full gear, in under five minutes. Vowing he'd never let her out of his sight again...

The trip to P2B340 had been a quiet one and Major Lorne had cast a few sympathetic glances in the direction of his passenger. He knew a little of what was going down between her and the Colonel, and judging by the way that said Colonel had been storming around the base for the past 48 hours, things had not be going... well.

He left her to her silence, a quiet man himself – and not one to force conversation on another if silence was what they really wanted. He figured she'd talk if she needed to, and sometimes the quiet? Gave him time to do his own thinking.

She broke the silence a half hour in. "Tell me about him, Major. Please"

Startled, he shot a glance sideways at her. "Who?"

"John Sheppard. Tell me about the man..."

Feeling just a little uneasy discussing a superior office while he wasn't there to defend himself, he blushed a little, then haltingly began.

"What do you want me to tell you? He's a damn good soldier, and a fine man... hell, I'd go to the bat for him any day. He's saved my butt more than once, and that of many people on the base. When it comes down to it, he's actually saved earth, more than once... not that anyone on earth would know that..."

She laughed. "Sounds like John... a little loaded in testosterone..."

Again that blush and she pushed down a chuckle. Lorne was adorable, shy and a little in awe of her and she tried to put him at ease.

"I'm not trying to find any dirt on him Major. I just want to find out what makes him tick. So far? He's brought me to my knees... more or less..."

This frank admission from her brought a startled look from Lorne. He had not expected such candid information from her. Maybe a little light conversation along the way, exchange a few pleasantries... but this? This was heavy stuff... advice column material, and he was not so sure he was ready for that.

"Shouldn't you be talking to the Colonel about your... feelings?"

"Ahh Major... that would be the obvious thing... but whenever I'm around him, I get an overload of senses, I can't think clearly, can't even speak clearly... don't know what's going on half the time. Like I said... he brings me to my knees. Both literally and figuratively."

Lorne couldn't resist the laugh that huffed out of him and his answer was dry. "Sounds like you've got it bad... if you don't mind me saying so. I guess, you need to find a way to let him know..."

She looked at him hopefully and another laugh escaped him.

"Uh uh... leave me out of it. This isn't high school, Nicole. I'm not passing notes in the coridoor. But if you want my advice... judging by the way he's been storming around the city like the proverbial bear with a thorn in his claw... if I was a betting man, I'd lay some serious odds down that he feels exactly the same way."

"Wish that were true Major... but the last real conversation we had? He more or less told me I wasn't ready for any sort of relationship... not exactly news from my point of view."

"I think that is what he was trying to tell himself, Nicole... not you. He's an open book where you're concerned... most of the base know how he feels when he looks at you. Not many secrets in Atlantis."

Startled she looked at him again and he hastened to reassure her.

"Oh, don't worry. I know there is some great white elephant hanging over your head about how you came to be here, and even with my ear to the ground, there's not much that anyone knows. Not for sure. So whatever secret you carry around with regards that, it's safe to say that you're covered."

She sat back in her seat in relief and was silent for the remainder of the trip, feeling Lorne's concerned glance cast her way from time to time. She had some thinking to do.

Her cameras at the ready she followed him, Rodney and the team of two achaeologists towards the ancient ruins that had been found on this planet. There were two confirmed settlements. The people of this planet were simple farmers and they placed high mythical importance on the ruins that were located in the west of the planet and did not visit there for superstitious reasons. The Lantiens had learned of these ruins through trading with these people and interest had been sparked when they had learnt that the ruins had been left not by the ancestors of those people, but a different race. McKay had been with the team that had arrived on the planet for the initial visit and he had immediately turned to John and asked if they could bring back a team to investigate.

Rodney was in the rear of the jumper now, engrossed in his hand held computer and Nicole had heard his voice from time to time, as he gave instructions to the archaeologists and interupted their conversations to theorise an idea of his own. Mostly she just tuned him out. She found him fascinating, yes – but she had difficulty following his train of thought most of the time, as many of them did and found it easier to let his voice simply roll over her.

They had been met by some of the elders from the settlement and Nicole had noticed immediately that they were not comfortable with the Lantien's coming into the anicent ruins. Having spent some time in South America in some of the ancient ruins, she had immeasurable respect for the superstitious aspect that these particular areas had for the people that lived within that culture. And she could see those same doubts in the faces of these people. Her hands automatically brought her camera to her eye, capturing that distrust on their faces, capturing the slanted looks at the group from another world, who sought now to find answers in their own.

Lorne watched her closely, a little intimidated in spite of himself. She had an easy grace, a casual attitude that made people comfortable around her, and he watched with a slight smile on his face as the elders gradually opened up to her and saw what she must have been seeing through her lens. The expressions changed from distrust to adoration as they sidled closer to touch her camera and turning it around, she was able to show them the photos she had captured of themselves. Their delighted grins brought a smile of his own and he shook his head. She appeared to have an innate quality in wrapping people around her little finger.

Rodney however, did not seem so taken with the lady. Tapping his foot impatiently, he huffed an aggrieved breath.

"A little less of the 'we love Nicole' routine and a little more of the 'let's get on the road' would be welcome about now. What do you say Lorne? Can we drag her away from her adoring fans and actually do what we came here to do? Ancient ruins... ring a bell?... hmmm?"

Shaking his head at the scientist, Lorne moved over to the group who were examining her photos, and called over his shoulder at Rodney.

"Actually Dr McKay, Colonel Carter asked specifically for Nicole to be here taking photos... part of her assignment that has come through from Washington." He imparted this last information, not knowing exactly why she was doing it, and Rodney shifted a little uncomfortably. He, of course, had all the facts and knew exactly why she was out here but knew also, that this information did not extend down to the Major. Not yet, anyway.

Rodney retained his sarcasm. "I'm assuming that her assignment includes the photographing of the ancient ruins... not the people. So case and point, Major Lorne."

Rolling his eyes at him, Lorne signalled to Nicole, not really wanting to interupt her. He knew the importance of keeping good relations with the people on each of the planets they visited. Rodney did not always keep this in mind, his only interest was in what he could find, not how many friends he could make and potential allies. Out here? Allies were what kept the wolf from the door, so to speak. She acknowledged him and he saw that her face was glowing and saw immediately the spell that Sheppard had fallen under. She had a way of drawing people towards her, the moth to the flame - and she was most definitely the flame. She glowed brighter than most, the passion for what she did showing clearly in every movement of her body, every expression. Lorne had to give himself a mental shake. This one was already taken.

"What wonderful people... so full of spirit and belief in their way of life, God - I'd love to spend a week here, with them. Any chance of that?"

Lorne laughed, gently steering her away from the departing elders and towards the impatient scientist, who was casting baleful looks in her direction.

"Take it up with your Colonel, but I'd say that would be a ... no..."

'Pity... maybe I'll work on him. Or maybe I'll just stay here and he'll have no choice?"

"Not on my watch you won't. You may have no trouble disregarding the Colonel's wishes, but me? He's my superior officer and even without that over my head, I respect the man, and if he wants you under surveillence at all times, then that necessitates you being in Atlantis, where that can be done." Lorne's voice held more than a hint of concern and she lightened her tone, wanting to reassure him.

"Don't worry Major. I won't get you in trouble... usually trouble finds me one way or another, and I won't go courting it. I know I'm treading on eggshells as it is with 'our' Colonel, but a week out here? Solitude and pictures during the day, then the hospitality of these wonderful people by night."

"No, Nicole...I mean it!"

"Spoilsport..."

"If you two are finished bickering, perhaps we could go and do our damn jobs!" Rodney's voice had risen to a snarl and the two archaelogists looked away in embarassment. Lorne let anger lace his voice now.

"Will you keep your shirt on Rodney! You'll get to the damn ruins, but you're not the only one with a job to do here, so quit your bitching!"

He received startled glances from both Nicole and Rodney, and the scientist huffed a breath and finally fell silent, falling in behind Lorne as he led the way through the clearing and down an overgrown pathway that looked as though it was not used on a regular basis.

The planet was a humid one and they had to endure Rodney's constant complaints as they moved at a brisk pace down the trail, swatting constantly at flying insects and applying repeated coats of insect repellent. Nicole had wondered idly whether an earth derived repellent would have any effect on the insect life on these alien worlds and when one particularly large and unappealing bug had landed on her bare arm, she had barely suppressed a screech and frantically moved on ahead to where Major Lorne took the lead position. Reaching out to him she had gotten his attention and he had immediately turned his amused eyes on her.

"A problem with the insect life, Nicole?"

"Not usually, but the incessant nibbling is starting to annoy me... does that bug repellent work? I think they're attracted to the healing scratches on my arm... ah crap!" She swatted loudly as one particularly large insect dug it's feeding tube into her already damaged skin and proceeded to drink long and deeply. Lorne stopped, picked up her arm and promptly used his thumb to squash the insect, then reaching into his tactical vest he brought out a tube of the same repellent that Rodney was using and rubbed a liberal layer of it over her exposed skin. She had coiled her long hair up on top of her head partway into the walk, the humidity was causing sweat to build up under her hair, and Lorne promptly turned her around and applied the repellent on the exposed neck.

She gave a long sigh of relief. "Thanks Major...I've been in jungles before and am used to high levels of discomfort. But this is a little extreme, even by my standards."

They reached the ruins a short time later and Lorne pulled his group together for instructions. "I need eyes on you all the time. If you need to leave the vicinity, no one goes alone, you come to me first and I will authorise your movements. It may sound extreme, but we would normally have two here for security, so we are spread a little thin at the moment. Nicole?"

He directed his words to her especially, knowing that she had a penchant for wandering off to get her photos, losing track of both time and the fact that there were other people in her party.

"Got it Major... but I'll apologise in advance if I become a little... remiss. Not intentionally, but in the heat of the moment..."

"There will be no 'remissing' Nicole. You keep me in sight at all times, or you'll think the Colonel is a pussycat..."

Startled brown eyes stared up at him and he fought down a smile.

She did try and keep within his sight, most of the time. They had been there for an hour and she knew that the Major was making noises about heading back to the jumper in order to check in with Atlantis. She looked up from what she was doing. In front of her was a beautifully sculpted wall that included artwork and detailing such as she had never seen before. She had run her hands along the intricate detailing and sighed a little with pleasure and Lorne, standing only a short distance away, had watched her with fascination as she had angled her camera as close as she could using her close up macro lens and taken shot after shot of the beautiful art work. Rodney had ambled over to see what had held her attention for so long and he had carefully removed tiny samplings of the material, without damaging the basic structure of the art, wanting to test the properties that had been used.

Lorne wandered over and looking over Nicole's shoulder, he nudged her slightly to get her attention.

"I need to get back to the jumper to radio Atlantis, or your Colonel will be champing at the bit. Rodney? I need you as eyes and ears for me. I'll only be gone for 20 minutes if I take it at a jog, just time to radio in and let them know we'll be another two hours?"

He raised his eyebrows in question at this and Rodney nodded. Two hours would be enough for now. The heat was beginning to get to him and he was mentally calculating the amount of food he had left. They could come back another time. With more equipment and more food.

"Nicole?"

She dragged her eyes away from what she was doing, having felt him standing behind her but crouched down on the ground she was busy checking through the photos she had taken.

"Sure Major...and yes, I'll behave. Scouts honour!" This brought a smile to her lips as she remembered these same words coming out of John's mouth as soon as they had met and she had immediately doubted the fact that he had ever been a boy scout. His face rose into her mind now. She had managed to keep from thinking about him too much, fully engrossed in what she was doing, this had not been an issue. But now? His words came to mind, as did his face and she wished they had not parted all those hours ago on such an angry and negative note. Hard to take back words that had already been said, and while they had both been busy since that time, it had been blatantly obvious to everyone that they had taken some pains to avoid each other. Until things calmed down a little.

Well, she was calmer. And she had the overwhelming urge to see him. Hell... to do more than see him. With the smile still on her face, but a little wistful now - she waved Lorne off and turned her attention back to what she was doing.

Lorne returned to the jumper in record time, having the need to expend some energy he had stepped it up to a full out run, and arrived back breathless and just a little exhilarated. He was about to enter the jumper when the he heard a familiar sound from overhead. The whine of wraith darts. Fear triggered immediately inside him and he ran for the radio, activating an open channel to Atlantis and not waiting for acknowledgement, gave the terse report that they were under attack by wraith. That was all the time he allowed - his mind was on the charges he had left behind at the ruins and he immediately pushed down his fear and headed back in the direction from which he had just come. He knew only Rodney was armed in that group, and Nicole.. hell... she would be terrified. With this in mind he redoubled his speed and burst out of the trail and into the start of the ruins just as the first dart flew overhead, it's telltale whine leaving a trail of sound across the sky, lingering for just a moment before it settled.

"McKay! Nicole!"

Weapon in front of him, Lorne came to a skidding halt and scanned the area, looking for signs of his charges. They were nowhere to seen and there was no answering call.

"Damn it you guys... where the hell are you? Dr McKay?"

He looked wildly around, coming to rest on a backpack that lay carelessly against one wall, and heading towards that he picked it up just as a second dart flew overhead, it's tracking beam running a lethal trail of death underneath it. Staying purposely out of it's path, Lorne flattened himself against one of the walls and peered around. There were no other signs that Nicole and the scientists were still in this area, but the ruins were large and it was likely that McKay had heard the sounds of the darts and encouraged the others to take shelter in another area.

The first dart flew back over again and after it had passed he heard the sound of gunfire, and biting back an oath he headed quickly in that direction.

The ruins provided adequate shelter and he was able to dodge from building to building in order to avoid the hunting darts. He wondered what had brought them here and suspected it was something to do with them being in the ruins. As far as they had been led to believe, the wraith had not visited this planet for a very long time and when they had spoken to the elders the first time they had come to trade, Rodney had thought that perhaps there was a device in the ruins that somehow repelled the wraith. It was possible that they had inadvertently turned off the device, simply by being here. Superstitions were bred from truth, and Lorne recalled that they had been responsible for bringing the wraith to a previously protected planet, more than once.

The sound of gunfire rattled again and he recognised the pitch. It was a beretta that had been fired, Rodney's weapon - and he breathed a sigh of relief. That meant they were alive and at least attempting to fight back, and keeping his own weapon at the ready he headed in the direction of the gunfire, which now sounded further away than before.

There were three darts criss crossing the sky in seemingly random patterns. Lorne knew there was method to their hunting and as a soldier himself he should have felt a small measure of respect as one military - of sorts - to another. But they only brought loathing and disgust. A monstrous race of people with no aspect of humanity left inside them, determined to wipe out the one race from which they had once evolved.

By the time Lorne reached the outer limits of the ruins he had still not caught up with his charges. He had not heard the gunfire again, and fear had begun to turn to panic and he mentally calculated how long it would take for help to arrive from Atlantis. He knew that Sheppard would have immobilised his team immediately and there would be others to follow. It had taken them a little over an hour to fly here, and it had been almost that since he had gotten word to Atlantis. All going well, he should have back up in the vicinity shortly and he knew that there would be hell to pay when the Colonel touched down and found his girl was missing. Lorne allowed himself the luxury of closing his eyes briefly. This could be his last respite.

He spent a half hour carefully scouting the edges of the ruins and there was still no sign of the team he had come in with. No clues left, no sounds - except the incessant whine of the darts that continued their overhead searching. Lorne hoped that meant they had come up empty so far, but he wasn't holding his breath.

He heard a new sound overhead and looking up, he saw nothing. But he felt immediate elation. He had recognised that sound. It was a jumper and no doubt in cloaking mode. Help was here. This was confirmed when gunfire shot across the sky and connected with one of the darts that flew alarmingly close to to the cloaked jumper and Lorne watched in triumph as the dart changed direction suddenly, falling towards the ground with black smoke trailing along behind it.

He didn't have long to wait after that. Sheppard's voice barked out orders from somewhere behind him and Lorne knew that he had landed the jumper nearby and was on the ground and not far away.

"Colonel Sheppard?" Lorne brought himself out into the open so that the Colonel could easily identify his position and keeping a close eye on the sky, watched as Sheppard, Ronon and Teyla ran quickly across the open area, bringing themselves up against the side of a building as another dart passed overhead.

"You all ok?" His voice was tightly controlled and the Colonel's eyes darted around the clearing, then up to the sky as the darts made another pass. "We need to get to that downed dart before more of them arrive, or worse. Over there, that trail of black smoke. Less than a click away. Where are the rest of your group? Nicole?"

His eyes had narrowed as he took in the resolve in Lorne's eyes.

"Yeah.. about that, Sir."

"Where the hell are they, Lorne?"

John's shoulder's slumped at the abject misery he saw on Lorne's face. This day had just gotten a whole lot worse.


	30. Chapter 30 Up close and personal

CHAPTER 30 – UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL

Rodney had immediately recognised the whine of the first dart as it took an exploratory path across the sky above the ruins. For a sometimes not so astute man, he reacted surprisingly fast – grabbing Nicole by the upper arm and shouting instructions to the two archaeologists working a short distance away.

"Wraith. We need to take cover – now!"

Nicole kept hold of her camera and pulled her glance upward, tracking the needle shaped ship that shot overhead with alarming speed.

"Rodney? What the hell was that... wraith? Please tell me you are not referring to the vampire, life sucking... things... that John told me about. You have to be kidding!"

Rodney didn't answer her, but keeping a grip on her upper arm he jogged to the outer edge of the ruins and tucked them back into a doorway as a second dart made a pass soon after the first one. Pulling his beretta out of his pocket, he released his grip on her and took aim towards the sky somewhat uncertainly.

"Jesus, Rodney. Do you even know how to shoot that thing? You're a damn scientist! And what the hell are you aiming at?" She had unknowingly drawn her camera upwards, capturing the path of the dart on her camera and kept the shutter down, so that a fast series of shots would show the speed that it streaked across the sky. When the second one passed over again, she yelped slightly when she saw a white beam of light that was emitted from beneath it, following a path along the ground, and coming alarmingly close to them.

"Stay away from that light, Nicole. That is a one way trip up to those ships, and believe me – it's not a trip you want to make. Once you get up there, you're dinner for one of those life sucking monsters."

"What about Major Lorne, what if he gets caught out in the open? We have to warn him..."

Rodney's voice was dry. "I suspect Lorne heard the darts before we did, and hopefully managed to get a message to Atlantis that we need help. He'll hightail it back here as soon as he can."

With the original fear wearing off slightly, Nicole became a little braver and ventured further out into the open, wanting to capture the light of the beam as it rode past her, and watched fascinated as it tracked towards her.

"Jesus, Nicole... are you crazy? Get over here now." Rodney lowered his weapon and gestured to her, but a sound in the bushes behind them had Rodney looking wildly over his shoulder.

"Lorne? Is that you?"

No reply, but the noise increased and out of the bushes stepped something that caused Nicole to stumble slightly and automatically bring her camera up and start clicking. A wraith, she assumed. Tall and clothed in a long coat with long straight white hair, skin the colour of the palest blue and textured with a tatoo like pattern that spread down one side of his face, almost like a series of cuts. His eyes gleamed yellow and focused immediately on her and the device that she held in front of her face.

She told her legs to move, but the connection from brain to that particular appendage had somehow failed. Short circuited. So she stood there, immobilised as the most terrifying creature she had ever come face to face with advanced on her with slow measured footsteps. And she remained in place as she stopped a short distance away from her and simply stared.

A shot rang out and the sudden noise galvanised her into action. She dragged her body around and ran, but felt the sting of something sharp as he was upon her in moments, his breathe cold and insidious as he breathed into her face and she flinched at the cold hatred she saw in those yellow eyes. She willed herself to look back at him, to try and show no fear. But human nature dictates that fear is a warning and allows you to create the appropriate adrenalin. And with said adrenalin racing through her system she did what came naturally. Aimed her knee into his groin area and gave it everything she had.

And somehow managed to bring him to his knees.

"Human!" His voice was a hiss and she shivered. Here in front of her was the vile creature that John and the rest of Atlantis had managed to keep in this galaxy and away from their own. This was their ultimate predator, the one thing that could decimate the human race if it was ever given the chance. This was what she had been asked to photograph.

For some unknown reason, a laugh bubbled out of her and she turned back to the wraith, and saw that he was on his feet, already recovered from the small blow she had dealt him. His gaze suddenly turned skyward as gunfire erupted up high and one of the darts was struck by something unseen, falling slowly out of the sky with a trail of black smoke. She too watched it's descent to earth and turning back to the wraith she saw that he was again coming toward her. Fight or flight. She chose the later, finally and simply turned and ran for her life.

Rodney had gotten off one shot and the gun had promptly jammed. He could only stand back and watch the interplay between Nicole and the wraith, unable to offer her assistance in any way. When he had seen the dart hit, he had known that a cloaked jumper from Atlantis had made the hit and mentally applauded what was likely John, Ronon and Teyla finally coming to their assistance. He had seen that the wraith was distracted by the sight of the dart being hit and saw also, that Nicole had finally run. In the opposite direction. And the wraith was in close pursuit.

Rodney made to follow, crashing through the bushes with enough noise to ensure any other wraith in the area would be alerted. But he didn't care. His mission was to keep Nicole in sight as best as he could, a failed mission already, as he pulled up to a stop having lost her.

"Rodney... Nicole?"

John! Rodney took a deep breath and called back. "Over here Sheppard! Hurry. Nicole's gone in that direction and she's not alone... I can't keep up."

John, Ronon, Teyla and Lorne came charging out of the bushes to his right upon hearing his voice and they barely paused to listen, they were heading in the direction that he indicated, simply waving a hand to show them which way to go. He remained doubled over with his hands on his knees, winded and wheezing and mentally regretting all those donuts he had eaten that previous day. It seemed that they were not appropriate fuel in this situation and wondered why the policeman of the good old USA kept ingesting such inappropriate food when they would likely be required to give chase during some point of their shift.

John pushed all thought from his mind as he ran. Nicole and the wraith. A match so not made in heaven. The image rose unbidden... her tiny frame and the monstrous feeding hand of the wraith as he hovered over her, hand held at the ready and about to strike. He increased his speed, heart in his mouth as he pushed himself almost beyond what he could possibly endure. Fight or flight? He chose the former. There had never been any doubt.

"Nic, Nicole? Where are you? Nic?" He called, hoping that somehow she would hear and respond. And somehow, he would be able to stop that wraith from doing what came naturally. Placing his hand upon her chest and sucking her life from her. Not gonna happen.

His breathing ragged, he burst out of some bushes and they were there. In front of him. She was lying on the ground and the wraith stood over here, an almost quizzical look on his face. He had paused for some reason, as though he was having difficulty in completing the job, having seen something in the face of the woman who lay beneath him.

John mentally applauded her. She did not go down without a struggle. He saw that her hair was tangled beyond anything a hairdresser could fix easily and her tshirt was pulled up to expose her tanned and trim midriff. Her jeans were ripped and blood dripped down one cheek. But she was alive and his heart beat a little faster at this. She was alive.

His weapon came up without conscious thought. The P90 kicked a little, then rattled like popcorn making their presence known in a hot pot with a little oil. Staccato. His aim was without thought, he simply lifted and fired and the wraith's body bucked in the aftermath, jerking and finally falling on the ground beside the woman who now rose unsteadily to her knees, head slightly bent.

He was beside her in seconds, leaving Ronon to check to see whether the wraith was in fact dead. His hands reached for her and with a sob she tumbled into his arms and he held her. So tightly that she gasped a little, but he would not let go. Pushing his face into her hair he breathed in her scent and shut his eyes, shutting out the sounds of the remaining darts and the sounds of the others. Opening his eyes he saw Lorne come up beside him and lay a hand on her head in relief and then Ronon had dropped to his knees and was peering into his face, concern and relief written across his features.

"Sheppard? You good?"

John nodded, not trusting himself to speech yet and feeling her movement, he let her pull back a little so that he could look down into those chocolate eyes. They held fear, loathing... not for him, he knew that, but for the monster that lay dead on the ground beside them. She shook her head, no words yet and leaned back into him so that he could take her weight and leave her with a weightlessness that took away some of the fear that had numbed her body.

"Aaahh, baby... god, I'm shaking right now. Seeing you with that monster... seeing his hand about to take you like that." He stopped, his voice had dropped to a whisper and was for her ears only, and she continued to lean into him while together, they found the strength to push away their combined fears. He helped her up, attempting to shield her from the sight of the dead wraith, but she couldn't resist. She picked up her camera and aimed, firing shot after shot – not caring what she captured. John's hand on her arm stilled her, and looking up she saw in his eyes what she had spent a life time looking for.


	31. Chapter 31 A life in the balance

CHAPTER 31 – A LIFE IN THE BALANCE

She didn't recall very much of the trip back to Atlantis. John wouldn't let her go. She did know that much. His touch was the only thing that kept her from going to pieces and while she had not been hurt, apart from minor injuries that would heal with time, she had managed to disasociate herself a little from what had happened, compartmentalise it into an area of her mind to deal with later. Much later.

He secured her into the second seat of the jumper before he took his own seat and felt her arms curl around his neck and he surrendered to her need for touch.

"I'm ok, John... I'm ok... just scared, a little... Really..." Her hand remained curled around his neck, and he felt a small bubble of laughter that had him sitting back on his heels beside her chair and letting her bury her face in his hair.

He took a deep breath, deciding to face this now rather than later. "Do you have any idea what it felt to see you on the ground, with him about to attack you. I thought I'd die myself..."

Her mouth moved around so that it rested against his cheek and it was only a tiny motion and his lips were on hers, hungry and needy and he took enough from her then to ease some of the residual horror that lurked in the back of his mind.

He had to get them home. Pulling away from her was like a physical pain, but once he took the controls he was able to centre his mind and fly the ship. Ronon had remained silent and Teyla was watching Nicole closely, and when she saw the tears form in the photographer's eyes, it was Teyla who left her seat and wrapped her arms around her and let her cry.

Rodney and the archaeologists had gone back with Lorne and John resolved to go easy on the Major. It had not been his fault, none of it had. A wraith attack on a planet that had been free of wraith cullings for many years – no one could have known that would happen, least of all Lorne. He knew the Major was upset at what had happened and resolved to talk to him when they returned. He was a good man, and had done his best to ensure the safety of the team he had taken.

There was a full jumper bay waiting for them when they returned. Sam, supportive as always. Carson with a gurney, not knowing who was injured and what sort of assitance would be required. It was Rodney who went to the gurney and collapsed on it, much to the amusement of everyone else. His imaginery illnesses and injuries were a source of contention in Atlantis and Carson knew better how to deal with him than anyone else.

"How about you leave the gurney for the real patients, Rodney. You've got no injuries that I can see, and I'm sure this can be put to better use."

"Look at me doc, I'm a mess. Fading away from lack of food, overadrenalin rush and not to mention a near heart attack from having to run after a wraith. Did I mention the lack of food...?"

"Yes, Rodney. Duly noted. Instead of taking up infirmary space, perhaps you would be better suited to staking out a place in the mess... I hear the chef is preparing salisbury steak this evening... hmmm?"

Sam hid a smile. This was a personal favourite of Rodney's and the speed with which he got off the gurney was not surprising. Food was a good motivator in Rodney's world.

"John, Nicole... Major Lorne? A word before you go and get cleaned up... please..."

Sam's voice was serious and they didn't argue. Nicole swayed lightly on her feet and John secured an arm around her. It was natural for her to lean in and he tucked her tightly against his side, urging her down the hallway towards Sam's office, briefly wondering what Sam had to tell them.

It didn't take her long. "I want to commend you Major Lorne, on your quick thinking in getting assistance as fast as you did. You're essentially taking on Nicole without all the facts, and I'm sorry about that. I want to fill you in on all the details, I think you have earned the right to know exactly what is going on, but you and I will do that tomorrow. I know you all need to get out of here and get some rest. And a shower..."

At that, Nicole grimaced. The ruins had been dirty and what had happened afterward... there was more grime on her body than she wanted to think about and it was more than just dirt.

"John, Nicole?" Sam wasn't finished yet, and Lorne wondered if he should leave, thinking perhaps this was a private conversation. She gestured for him to stay.

"We have a name in Washington. Someone who is willing to give us names. Places. A start. Jack has been in communication and he is amazed at how far reaching this is. We've got a month – the same time frame that Nicole was given. Evan? You'll get all the details tomorrow. If you're going to be included in Nicole's security detail, then it is only fair that you are up to play with all the information."

Lorne nodded. He had more or less worked out that there was a story flying under the radar. And yes, it was easier to protect someone when you had all the facts.

"Ok people. Go and get some rest... food... whatever you need. Evan? Tomorrow 0900 – here. You'll be privy to what we know and then we'll go from there. Dismissed, people."

John saw her safely to her quarters. Punching the door open he simply stood on the outside, waiting for her to go in so that he could ensure it was shut properly. He didn't go in, knowing she needed to sleep, and knowing that he needed the same thing. And there was the last 48 hours to consider.

But what he didn't consider was the look in her eyes when she turned to face him. The longing that made those chocolate eyes melt even the hardest heart. He closed his eyes, but he saw the same thing behind them and muttering an oath, he stepped inside and closed the door.

It was almost as though she didn't know what to do. Simply stood there and looked at him, arms hanging loosely at her side. He moved towards her and took her in his arms and when he felt her body push hard against his, his self control was lost. Right then.

Pulling the tshirt over her head he drew her back against him, feeling the warmth of her skin as he lightly skimmed his fingers over it. Heard her sigh as she pushed her hands under his tshirt to splay her hands across his warm back. Her hips ground relentlessly against his groin, urgent and needy and he was already there. Hard and needing her with a desire that had the blood surging through his veins.

"I want you Nicole. Tell me now if you don't feel the same... and I'll stop. But leave it much longer? I'm nearly there now... god, I want you so much." He murmured the words against her cheek and she moved so that his mouth took hers. Without mercy, without impunity. And she gave back as much as he took.

He managed to get the rest of her clothes off. There was so much heat that he thought that he would go up in flames then and there. He couldn't take his eyes off her as she stood in front of him and couldn't keep his hands from reaching and touching. There... and there... and when she sighed softly... he touched her again.

Her hands reached down and grasped him and he wondered vaguely how his pants had come to be in a puddle on the floor. But thought proved unnecessary and he simply stepped out of them and guided her over to the bed, gently pushing her so that she tumbled backwards onto the bed, laughing a little.

"You're sure?" He looked down into those warm chocolate eyes and her answer was physical not verbal. She wrapped those silken legs around his waist and tugged him close, her giggle a wonderful sound in that room.

When he entered her she cried out his name and he stilled. It was his name she had said, not Ben's, not the ghost of a man who had stood between them until now. At peace now, he began a rhythm that she easily picked up and as his hands moved restlessly over her body, her eyes remained locked on his so that he could be sure she knew exactly who she was taking to bed that night.

The moment of her orgasm brought clarity. She was ready to move on and it was with a small smile that she acknowledged the ghost that did hover in the corner of the room. Watching her with a slight smile and turning to leave at the moment that she let him go.

Tucked up against him he had raised himself slightly on one elbow to look down at her, but her eyelashes were already drooping and he dropped a light kiss onto her nose, causing a slight smile to find it's way across her face.

"Sleep, baby... it's been a long day."

"Don't leave me, John... stay, please."

"Not going anywhere sweetheart..." Feeling her breathing change, he knew the moment that she succumbed to sleep and pulled her just a little closer.


	32. Chapter 32 A story to write

CHAPTER 32 – A STORY TO WRITE

With wakefulness came a moment of panic. He was alone in the bed. _Had she run again? Damn... would she always be one step ahead of me, looking back at the life she had..?"_

A small sound had him rolling over and a relieved smile came to his face. Not alone. Her small figure was hunched slightly over his laptop which she had set up on the small table near the other side of the room. The early morning sun had crept across the balcony and allowed questing fingers to reach into the room and one particular band of warmth seemed determined to hold her in it's insistent grip. She glowed in that early morning light, her hair a mess of riotious curls that had been tumbled haphazardly on top of her head and her face held an intense expression as her fingers flew over the keyboard with relentless speed.

She didn't acknowledge him when he pushed himself out of bed, reaching for his shorts on the ground and stretching a little to ease out some of those incessant kinks, he ambled to the other side of the room, still not talking, and leaned in behind her, dropping a light kiss on the back of her neck and reaching over to read the words on her screen.

He winced slightly. Her skill with words was comparable to the quality of the photos she took. Honest to the point of brutality, she had painted a picture of what she had seen out here so far, with startling clarity. It was all there in black and white, and as he continued reading, he knew why they had chosen her to do this job. This expose. Her skill was formidable and believable. If this was published, they'd have commercial companies lining up to be the ones to mass products ships such as the Prometheus but what would be longer? The lines of people who would pay a million dollars or more, to step onto those ships. Life as they knew it on earth, would change in a heartbeat.

"So...?" Her voice held an amused quality, but her eyes were still on the screen in front of her as word after word rippled across it.

"So... my delectable little writer... this is what that group are after? Or is this your own slant on things? Somehow, this puts things in our favour, not theirs."

"My intention, Colonel Sheppard. You like?"

His mouth moved around, dropping small kisses around her neck and up to her cheek. "Mmmmm... I like..."

She giggled, squirming a little. "I'm working..."

Sighing a little, he pulled away and grabbed some clothes. "I'll at least get some caffeine and food into you. Anything in particular you want me to bring back?" He waited at the door hopefully, and when she didn't answer straight away, he turned back to the door about to open it.

He didn't get that far. He felt her small arms wrap around him and a soft body pull itself against his back. Turning with a smile on his face, he pulled her into his arms, wrapping them tight around her for a brief hug.

"Morning... John." Cheekily she raised her eyes to his and he saw the humour glinting there and growling slightly, he dropped his head and ground his lips hard enough against hers to bring a delighted gasp from her. He walked her back towards the bed, pushing her down onto it – her gasp turning to laughter as she held out her arms to him and he dropped down lightly onto the bed beside her, burying his lips in her neck.

"Morning... sweetheart..." and she giggled as his hands found the same places that had brought her so much pleasure last night.

She accompanied him to the mess in the end. Closing the laptop, he noted with amusement that she had somehow managed to appropriate it and mentally filed a request to Sam to order a new one. For her. A shower had tamed that mess of curls, and now they sat in more or less relative harmony down her back in long auburn waves. He couldn't resist tugging on one as she moved past him in the doorway, heading into the mess.

Without asking she made a beeline for the table where the rest of his team sat. Rodney, a tray full of food and a mouth as equally full. Attempting to speak around said full mouth. She simply waved at him, indicating that he should continue eating, and he needed no further encouragement. Ronon raised a questioning eyebrow at them, took in the glow that lit Nicole's face and waggled the eyebrow in John's direction. John moved off toward the coffee, chosing not to say anything, but did slap the big Satedan on the shoulder as he walked past. Hard.

Teyla's eyes were warm and it was she who gestured to the chair beside her and gratefully, Nicole pulled it out and sat down beside the Athosian.

"You do not appear to be suffering too much from your ordeal yesterday. An encounter with a wraith is not a pleasant experience and I know of many who would be in a far worse condition today."

"I come from tough stock Teyla. Yeah, it was not so pleasant... those guys? Ughhh... let's just say the story I'm writing? Is pretty much writing itself. As John will attest."

"So... you've been writing?" Ronon's tone was derisive. He knew that it was more than passion for her work that had put that glow there.

"I have, Ronon. Why? Is there something else you think I should be doing?" Her tone was slightly acid and he laughed. This little thing could give as good as she would get and he earned a dark look from Sheppard who had come back to the table with two cups of coffee, placing one on the table in front of Nicole. Her eyes over the rim of her cup with sparkling with a little fire and he mentally debated leaving Ronon to her acerbic tongue knowing that she could well take care of herself in that department.

"Writing... Ronon. Yeah. On my laptop. In my room. Got that?"

"Loud and clear Sheppard!" He grinned and turned his attention back to his own breakfast. A heaped plate of bacon and eggs – an earth meal that he had taken to as soon as he had arrived in Atlantis. In fact, John thought it might have been one of the considerations in making Ronon stay in this city. That, and the fact that he had no where else to go. His homeworld of Sateda had been destroyed by the wraith over a year ago and they had found him on a planet running from the wraith with a tracking device in his back, used by the wraith as bait for hunting. They had removed the tracking device, earning this trust of a man who did not trust easily. The food in Atlantis? That was the deciding factor...

"So Sheppard. Plans for the day? Mission?" Ronon finished his plate and wiped his hand across his mouth. He had yet to develop manners as would be considered necessary on earth in what was deemed to be polite company, and ate the way his people had eaten for centuries. Mostly with his hands. John took his as he found him. He had befriended Ronon from the very first, and they now had a formidable bond that would not be broken easily.

"John?" Sam stood at their table looking down at the group and their easy comraderie. "There's been a development. Robert's been called back to earth for a meeting. He received an encoded communique this morning and if he doesn't go, they'll know he's been compromised and those people on his list will start to fall down like a house of cards. We need to let him go back."

"We need to trust him..." John's voice was pensive. "Can we do that?"

"It's my call John, ultimately. But I want your take on it." Sam pulled out a chair from a neighbouring table and slotted it at the end of their section.

"It's a case of damned if we do and damned if we don't. No choice really. I trust him, as much I trust anyone that comes to us with a story that'll blow life as we know it out of the water. With a large grain of salt. Can we send someone with him?"

"Well heres the kicker John... and you're not going to like this very much. Amend that. You're not going to like this at all."

"Spill it Sam..." John's face had darkened considerably and he placed the coffee cup down on the table. Hard.

"They've told him to bring Nicole with him to the meeting. They want a face to face with her. He thinks they're worried he's not...handling... her. I think they want to reinforce their message."

Of it's own accord, John's hand swept the coffee cup off the table, the noise of it shattering on the floor suddenly loud in the mess. Silence followed and looking around, Sam saw that all eyes were upon them.

"John..." she murmured. "We need to take this to my office. Don't do this here."

One of the kitchen staff had come out with a brush and shovel and had quickly cleaned up the mess and John squeezed his fist, attempting to show some sense of normality until they could move this to a more private location. He gave the man a tight smile and pushing his chair back, signalled to the others that breakfast was over. Rodney took a last sip of coffee and cast an aggrieved face at his half full plate.

"Why can't you at least do these things when it is not a mealtime, Sheppard. You're spoiling one of the few pleasures for me here in Atlantis. Free food."

John's glance at him had his words drying quickly in his throat, and it was with more than his usual speed that he pushed back his chair and quickly took his tray to the disposal area. It was Teyla who had the foresight to pick up two muffins to go for John and Nicole, knowing that they had not eaten yet and the somber group left the mess, amid curious glances from the others who had attempted to return to their meals after the interuption. It was obvious to everyone on the base that something was going down.


	33. Chapter 33 Return to earth

CHAPTER 33 – RETURN TO EARTH

His face was like thunder by the time they arrived in Sam's office and he slapped his hand hard on her desk even before she had the time to sit down behind it.

"Not gonna happen, Sam. I'm not letting her go anywhere near those guys. With or without protection. We have no idea who they are yet... but we know they wield enough power to have a whole craptower to bring crumbling down. You can't seriously even consider letting her in a room with them?"

Sam didn't answer him immediately, and Nicole's brown eyes flashed between the base commander and the man she had spent last night with. She knew that there would be a power struggle here and saw in Sam's eyes that there was no question that she go to that meeting.

Attempting to insert herself between the combustible Colonel and the woman behind the desk, she forced him to look at her, not speaking until she had gotten his full attention. Her voice when it spoke, was quiet. Intuitively she knew that raising her voice to this man right now would stroke the embers of his anger to the point where he would hurt himself. She had no fear that he would ever hurt her.

"Listen to me John. Please. I want you to sit down and just listen. Can you do that?" She had placed her hands on his arms, stoking gently the inside of his wrist and something, both in that rhythmic action and her voice had his eyes softening a little and him backing up to the nearest seat. He sat down, her grip on his arms still tight enough to keep him in the seat and she had to bend slightly so that when he looked up, all he could see was her. She saw him take a deep breath and he nodded once. Sharply. To indicate that he was good to go.

Experimentally she removed her hands and watched as one curled immediately into a fist, then relaxed. Stepping back, she sat lightly on the armrest of his seat and allowed his hand to move so that it rested on one her knees, tapping a nervous rhythm there.

Sam and the others watched the subtle interplay, watched as in the space of a few moments she had calmed him down with both quiet words and a simple touch. _Lego blocks_ thought Sam with just a small spark of humour. _Meshing together so perfectly to form whatever they need to form. She's his 'ying' to his 'yang'. And it looks like they've finally done something about it..._

"Tell me exactly what the communique said, Sam." His voice was even, the earlier anger and simmering tension just below the surface, but for now? Sam would take that calm and tell him what he needed to know. She pushed across a piece of paper with handwriting on it.

"It came to him via an encrypted message, and this is the uncoded version."

He read quickly, and Nicole perched on the side of his chair read it along side him. The meeting was to take place tomorrow in Washington in the hotel room of a large hotel on the outskirts. A non descript hotel that would not be used by any of the normal players that Washington was made up of.

"So can we get our own people here before hand? To sweep and put backup into place?"

He was all military now. The man was gone and the soldier had stepped up to the plate and Nicole watched his face curiously at the transformation. The eyes had hardened, as had his features and he no longer touched any part of her body. She longed for her camera to capture that transformation and an idea for another story came instantly to mind. Out here? The storylines seemed endless and she came to the realisation that life on earth had began to make her jaded and disgruntled. Here? She had found a new spark, a new enthusiasm and a new way to attack her passion and skill. And it was only partly due to a certain dark haired Colonel. The rest was the place itself. She wondered if she could go back to earth one day and take up the life she had before. And had the answer immediately. This place had quickly become home.

"Jack is already onto it as we speak, John. Thank you for trusting me on this. And thank you Nicole... for whatever magic you hold right now. It's working..."

She paused, looking around the room to check the reactions of the rest of John's team. Ronon remained silent as always but she had seen the tension when John had been about to explode. He had been ready to hold him down, secure him if need be. They too, had a symbiotic relationship and one would feed from the other... emotionally. Teyla? Teyla's eyes were on Nicole, and they were slightly troubled. Sam knew that Teyla was developing a level of friendship with the photographer and could see from Teyla's expression that her safety was on her mind also. And that left Rodney. Expression a little sour as he was no doubt recalling his unfinished breakfast. She stifled a smile. An unusual group of people who made up this elite team. But it worked. Most of the time, anyway.

She continued. "We'll have eyes and ears in there John. The very best that we can get our hands on, and Jack's looking into sniper locations but this one is proving to be trickier. They have chosen their location wisely. There are no surrounding buildings that afford any sort of sight into the room that has been booked for this meeting. It is wide open. The best we can do for backup is get our people in there undercover. Staff, maintenance people. We're working on that and it'll be in place for the meeting. Robert contacted them back immediately and gave the go ahead. We can't fit Nicole with a wire because both her and Robert will be searched before they enter the room. No weapons either. That goes without saying."

She concluded her monologue and sat back, waiting for the reactions. John's eyes, when he raised them to hers, had changed. The soldier was gone and the man was back, and the expression in them was bleak.

"How do I just let her go?" He didn't even try and hide the angst.

"How can you not, John..." Sam's indication was clear. If she didn't go to that meeting, the house of cards would come tumbling down. Robert would be compromised and the domino effect would start. The people on his list would go down... and it would escalate from there. They also had Nicole's family to consider. Do this right, and they'd get enough intell on the people in that meeting to work their way further into the shadow group.

He pushed himself abruptly out of the seat, nearly dislodging Nicole in her somewhat precarious position on the edge of his armrest.

"I need to think Sam. I need to process this on my own." He flicked an apologetic look at the woman he had held in his arms last night and turned, striding out of the room. Nicole went to follow but it was Teyla who put out a hand to stop her.

"Let him go for now Nicole. He knows what is the right thing to do, he just needs to come to terms with that, and he can't do it when he looks at you. Give him some space to let this sit right with him. Just as he gave you your space the other day." She lifted her eyebrows at Nicole and watched as the other woman's face changed, smiling a little now.

"I'll give him his space Teyla, but not for long. There's a fine line between 'thinking' and 'stewing' and if I time it right, I can make sure he doesn't cross that line. I see from this note that they want to to take what I have written and photographed to date. I'll need to do a rewrite I think... what I pounded out this morning will most definitely not be to their liking. Subterfuge, obfuscation and plausible denial... much, eh?"

It was only Sam and Rodney who understood these last words she spoke, but the others got the general idea of what she was referring to. Ronon looked at the tiny photographer with new respect. He had been prepared to dislike her from the start. In his oppinion, John didn't need some woman getting under his skin. Keep it simple and fun, that was his theory. But as he had gotten to know the fiesty woman himself, and had seen the way she fit into John's somewhat solitary life, he had begun to acknowledge that his friend was likely better off with her than without her. He made a decision.

"How much training have you had? Self defense..."

Teyla's eyes lit up as she followed immediately where he was going with his question.

"Oh... a little. Well, more than a little, I guess. I've spent a lot of time in 'hot' zones and brought down some rather undesirable sorts, so Ben …." she hesitated just briefly when she said his name this time, "... insisted that I at least be able to kick some ass..."

"Bet I could teach you some new... tricks..."

Looking up at his huge body and formidable build she swallowed slightly. "I bet you could Ronon. Is that an offer... I have to warn you. There's not much left on my body that hasn't seen some damage these past couple of weeks..."

"I'll be gentle..." he growled these words and she grimaced. Somehow she didn't think his 'gentle' had the same meaning as the one in her dictionary.


	34. Chapter 34 Introspection

CHAPTER 34 – INTROSPECTION

He paused outside her quarters as he walked swiftly down the hallway towards his own. Remembering last night and the way her body had felt beneath his as she gave him what he had been craving these past two weeks. A part of her. Hell, make that all of her. She hadn't held back. No, not at all. All that passion and emotion she poured into her photos and her writing, it was there in spades... in the darkness as he had entered her body and felt her primal reaction to that first touch. Sam was right. Lego blocks, fitting together and maybe, just maybe. Building something really great that could last.

He continued on to his own quarters, grimacing a little when he paused in front of the mirror. This morning's shower may have washed away the grime of the day before, but the darkened circles under his eyes were testimount to a very heavy few days. Emotionally and physically. Scrubbing a hand over his face, he decided against the shave – heading instead to his running shoes pushed untidily into a corner of the room. He needed to think and he'd do it the way it did it best. Just as Nicole had done that first day. Run it off. Run into it. Then face it head on.

That ever present ocean breeze immediately dispelled the slight headache that sat dully at his temples. Taking a deep, cleansing breath of that Lantien air, he closed his eyes and when he opened them again he was running, footsteps pounding a satisfying rhythm over the pier. The contents of the note flew through his mind with the same rhythm. A meeting with the people that could bring down the world as they knew it, if they weren't stopped. His girl. Alone and unarmed against monsters who would kill her without impunity. He recalled how she had stood her ground against the wraith, tiny – yet larger in spirit than anyone he had ever met. Had heard from Rodney how the wraith had simply... paused, when she had almost brought him to his knees. Just as she had brought him to his knees. In a different way.

To let her go in there armed with nothing more than her camera. And it was doubtful they'd allow that... laptop, then. Armed and dangerous... that was his girl. He couldn't resist the bark of laughter that escaped, and wafted forgotten, into the Lantien sky. Yeah, she'd probably kick their proverbial asses – with words and that scathing tongue. He wondered who in that room would come out unscathed from that meeting.

So, yeah, he'd worry. Yeah... he'd be pounding the crap out of something the whole time she was out of his sight. But in the end? There was no choice. There never had been and she had known that in Sam's office a short time ago and found just the right way to let him know.

He continued with his run, sweat drenched and a little dangerous. But with clarity now, and that was what he had been missing before.

A short time later he was torn between laughter and concern. It hadn't taken him long to find her. There had been some snickers from personnel as he had passed by them in the hallway, and some whispering and he had picked up enough to know that Ronon was doing what Ronon did best. Beating the crap out of someone. He headed in the direction of the workout room, where Ronon and himself spent many hours sparring with one another. It was not John who came out on top most of the time. Ronon was a formidible opponent, and John had taken many a trip to the infirmary for stitches and other patch up jobs after a particularly intense session with Ronon.

He heard the thud of a body hitting the floor just as he walked in and shock replaced amusement when he saw the small frame of the woman who was presently tipping his normally fairly ordered world, into slight chaos lying supine on the floor with the large Satedan hovering over her, with a hand extended.

"Jesus, Ronon. If you are doing what I think you are doing... then there's no place on this base for you to hide. If you get my drift."

"Chill, Sheppard. I'm not hurting her. Tell him, Nicole. Have I damaged you... yet?" Ronon's voice held a thread of amusement and something else. John heard the undercurrent and his posture relaxed.

"You couldn't have waited until she had no prior injuries? Carson's gonna put your balls into a vice if you mess her up any more, and that's tame compared to what I'll do to you."

"Yeah? You and who's army, Sheppard?"

John spluttered slightly. Ronon had been quick to pick up on earth slang and terminology and more than just occasionally, he came out with a particular expression that sounded just... wrong... coming from this non earth human.

"I'll take you on any day of the week, Chewie..." John's pet name for Ronon, so called for the large Wookie in Star Wars, his favourite all time movie, brought a smile from Nicole who had just been pulled to her feet by Ronon. John saw for himself that she was unharmed and saw the calculating expression that she aimed his way.

"Come over here John, and I'll show you just what I learnt... if you think you can take me on?" Her smile was cheeky and more than just a little challenging and unable to resist he found himself standing in front of her, a hand reaching out automatically to her waist, pulling her in close to him. Tipping her face up to his, she quickly read the clarity he had found in that punishing run, and smiled to herself. So... it was 'thinking' and not 'stewing'. _Good job Colonel John Sheppard. Now let's take this up a level... hmmm?_

She didn't give him any time to think. Hooking her much shorter leg around one of his long ones she caught him off balance immediately and suddenly he was down on the ground looking up into her amused brown eyes, surprise flickering in his hazel ones.

Ronon's bark of laughter echoed around the room. "Don't feel too sorry for yourself Sheppard. She had me down on that ground more than once. She'd got some moves of her own. She's packing some heat in that small body, and she's fast. Hell, make that super fast. A walking pint sized weapon."

John rolled to his feet. Wisely, she did not offer a hand down to help him up, thinking that it might rub his already fragile ego a little raw.

"So... what do you think?" Her eyes sparkled now, and he thought of mercury – everchanging and somewhat unstable.

"About what?" he grumbled, brushing down his pants as he pulled himself up to his full height, trying unsuccessfully to intimidate her with his size.

"Think I can hold my own? In that meeting?"

He glared down at her now. Mercury? Hell, she was pure atomic energy, and this somewhat elite group of theirs? A classic high school chemistry show and tell. Colonel John Sheppard and Nicole Harmon – caught in electromagnetic fields causing like charges to repel each other and unlike charges to attract each other. Sam was the proton keeping them together in the nucleus because the strong force would oppose and overcome the forces of repulsion from the electromagnetic field. Nicole... the binding energy associated with the strong force, the energy holding the nucleus together. Himself... the stable atom with enough binding energy – Nicole - to hold the nucleus together permanently. And the somewhat irreverent through that followed... Ronon, a sometimes unstable atom with not enough binding energy to hold the nucleus together permanently known in chemistry as a radioactive atom. His team. And his woman? Yeah, maybe she was the unstable one... radioactive and ready to take on the world.

"Don't bring levity to the table, Nicole. You know better than that. This will be no 'run back to my safe world if things go wrong' scenario. This is a conspiracy with no safety net. Yeah, I get that you have done some heavy stuff over the years, I've seen some of the pictures, read the stories. But you always had a safety net, didn't you? Well guess what sweetheart? It's been ripped out from under you, so if you go down? You go down hard. So, don't get me wrong... I love your attitude... or at least a part of me does, and I am so damn proud of you for taking this on. But I have to make sure your head is in the right game... because this is a game of thrones like you've never come across before..."

Ronon had stepped back from the intensity in his voice and chose not to comment. This was not his argument and a part of him understood what he was trying to do. But another part? Screamed at John to let Nicole handle this her way. With levity if necessary. If that's what it took for her to do this, then let her have that much.

John wasn't finished. "Hell... I don't want you to go into that meeting with us arguing... so, I'm done with what I wanted to say. Got that off my chest. I just want you safe."

She had been about to wind up with anger of her own, but this last comment? Deflated that anger immediately and she simply stepped into his arms and let him hold her, burying his face in her hair.

"Ever considered taking up writing, John?" she murmured against his chest. "You certainly seem to have more than your share to say..."

And was rewarded with a hearty burst of laughter from John and Ronon who shook their heads and exchanged a look.

She'd be ok.


	35. Chapter 35 National security

CHAPTER 35 – NATIONAL SECURITY

He made sure she ate properly the next morning and Carson demanded a full physical before she went back through that gate. As she slid onto the bed, Carson was quick to see the tremor that ran through her and he flicked a worried glance at the Colonel, who stood silent and watchful a short distance away.

"Colonel? A word please..."

John raised his eyebrows, but followed the doctor into his private office, just off to the side of the infirmary. Nicole barely noticed that they had left. She was caught up in what she was about to do and told herself that the levity she had shown the day before was simply a cover for what was really going on. She was terrified. John's words had hit home. A game of thrones with only one winner. She had to make sure that the victory flag had her name on it.

"Doc? What is it?" John felt cold inside. They had held each other close through last night, cocooned in the darkness inside his quarters, and he had helped her forget, just as she had helped him. But with the light of day came that coldness. He had to watch her step through that gate into the arms of pure evil. This seemed harder than the worst mission in Afghanistan... and that one had been a bitch. But action was better than sitting on his proverbial hands, and for all intents and purposes, that is exactly what he would be doing here in Atlantis, while Nicole went back to earth and stared into the eyes of the players that held command of the chess board.

"It goes without saying lad, that we're all worried. Sam's filled me in, I know what she has to do today, and I can only guess at the crap that you're trying to sort through. She's terrified John, and trying her best to hide it from you. Don't let her go thinking that she is riding this one lightly. I just felt a thousand watts of tension in her when I helped her onto that bed. I want to give her something to calm her down. Take her anxiety down a level."

"You're talking medication, doc? I don't know that she would go for that. A little fear of needles..."

This brought an unwilling smile to Carson's face. He remembered her needle phobia quite clearly.

"I'm recommending it, as her doctor. She's been through a lot in two weeks. Life changing stuff, as you well know. This could send her over the edge, and yes lad – she's a tough wee thing with more guts than most men I know. But some of it is a front, hell – I think most of it is a front. And that's my medical opinion."

"You're afraid she'll crack..."

"That would be my medical opinion... yes."

"Then give her something, whatever you recommend. I'll make sure she takes it." John lifted an eyebrow. "I have my ways."

"I'm sure you do, lad – and good luck to you."

John turned, heading back into the infirmary. "Thanks... gonna need it, I suspect." He muttered these last words before he reached her side, but she heard the tail end of them, pulling herself out of her reverie.

"Gonna need what, John? Fill me in on that private meeting with the doctor? Hmmm? Especially as I suspect it concerns me..."

"Doc's worried. Hell babe, we all are. But he thinks you're on the edge. Wants to give you something... to pull you back from the edge."

"Drugs?" She grimaced a little. "You know how I feel about that. But John?"

"Yeah...?"

"I'm scared... time to admit that, I think."

"Aaah hell..." He wrapped her in his arms, breathing in her sent. "Part of me didn't want to hear that, but the other part? Glad you told me... 'cause I'm terrified. And it was scaring me more that you weren't feeling it. Will you take something, please..."

Carson hovered in the background. He gave them a moment, and saw when she gave in and nodded and he breathed a sigh of relief and went to prepare the hypodermic needle. He would give her a light dose, just to take her down a little and would send Robert with another dose to administer in the mid way station if he thought she needed it – otherwise he could dose her up at the SGC, before she transferred in private transport to the meeting place.

It took effect immediately. The haunted look lifted from her eyes and she took deep breaths. Calming breaths. And once he was finished with his full check up, he let her leave where she would go immediately to the gate room. Robert was already there and waiting and all Nicole was permitted to take was her flashdrive with the revised story and photos. She would take nothing else.

John held her tightly and felt that her tremors had gone. His, however – had not and it was Nicole who sought to reassure him now.

"Keep the light burning, Colonel. I'll be back before you know it, and hopefully with enough data to start crashing down that house of cards."

She smiled around the room, catching Ronon's eye and winking at him. Blowing a kiss to Rodney who simply blushed and waving, she took Robert's hand and stepped through the gate. And the light suddenly went out of that room.

They spent six hours in the mid way station and Robert talked quietly with her about his life and let her talk about hers. They formed an uneasy bond of sorts – an alliance that would either help or hinder. At this time, he wasn't sure which way it would go. But he would do his best to get her through it and out of there in one piece. He'd given his word to the Colonel in a private conversation and knew the trust that Sheppard had put in him when he sent him off with his girl.

She'd seemed calm, so he didn't give her the second shot. The SGC was a different story. She met General Jack O'Neill – a tall imposing man with twinkling brown eyes that peered down at her in consternation.

"In any other circumstances, I'd say I'm pleased to meet you. But under these ones... hell girl. I don't envy you at all. I'm simply passing you through here, can't be seen to have too much contact – although I'm thinking they're not really going to care too much about who knows what anymore. My enquiries have been discreet, but there's too many ears and eyes out there, and I'm thinking that I likely blew my cover a day or so ago. So a heads up on that one. You may be going into that meeting with them a little miffed."

"Gee thanks for that General. So... the transport?" She turned to Robert.

"You're being picked up by helicoptor and taken to the meeting place. I'm not authorised to go with you. This is as far as I go, then I escort you back to Atlantis. My instructions."

"And you tell me this now? Are you kidding? I go in there alone... ah crap. That last shot... now would be a damn good time to poke me with it. Ahh crap."

She tugged her fingers through her hands and shook her head.

_Yeah Nicole.. and I have to go and send a communication back to Atlantis that I have delivered my package. Without an escort. Guess who's head is going to be on the block when we get back? You'll hear your Colonel yelling blue murder from here... that much I can guarantee._

Robert hooded his eyes, trying to shut out the guilt he felt. There was nothing he could do. His instructions were explicit and he had agreed with Sam and John that he would comply to the letter, in order to give you the best advantage she could get.

They were interupted by the radio technician.

"Excuse me... Sirs, Ma'am... there's a helicoptor on the landing pad upstairs waiting to take Miss Harmon to a meeting. They are requesting that she be sent up immediately."

She nodded once at the men and turned to follow a marine who had arrived from out of nowhere to escort her to the surface. She'd do this, then write the story of her life. Expose these men in such a way that they'd do more than come tumbling down. She'd light a fire that burnt every tendril of evil so that it couldn't grow back again.

And then she'd go back to Atlantis and maybe try and make a life with a certain dark haired Colonel who had brought her back from the edge.


	36. Chapter 36 The meeting

CHAPTER 36 – THE MEETING

There was only herself and the pilot. No escort. _No witnesses..._ she thought to herself. _No one to see me leave the SGC, no one to prove whether I was here or not... covering their tracks already. I bet there's been no flight plan logged for this helicoptor._ And she wondered also, whether the pilot was on their payroll or simply a pilot doing his job.

Resigned to the fact that she was on her own, she lay her head back against the seat. The pilot did not attempt communication of any kind, other than to give her the headphones to put on when she had slid into the craft. Which were a waste of time in her opinion, considering he refused to speak to her.

She must have dozed, although she had no idea how that had come to pass. They had landed outside a small airfield, and pulling the headphones off her head she had rubbed a hand wearily over her eyes and climbed out of the door that had been held open for her. The pilot did not meet her eyes, she felt them slide across her face and landed somewhere west of her shoulder. She gave a mental shrug and peered into the darkening sky. It had been a long flight and she was hungry, but knew that if she attempted to eat, she'd likely throw up. So the empty stomach would stay just that for now.

A car waited on the tarmac. Black lincoln town car with darkened windows. It sat ominously facing the helicoptor and the headlights turned on then, blinding her for a moment until she could shift her gaze and at the same time, a hand clamped around her elbow and moved her toward the waiting vehicle.

Contact had been made.

She was pushed a little roughly into the car and the same man closed the door and went to the driver's side. She smelled cigarette smoke and turning her head, saw a man sitting on the far side of the car, puffing a cigar and looking not at her, but straight ahead.

"So...?" It was an awkward silence. For the past few hours she had had only her own thoughts for company, and now her new bedmate was a large, balding man who puffed incessantly on a cigar. She wondered if she would pass out from lack of food or the smell of the cigar first. Nausea roiled in her stomach and she tried to lower the windows to let in some fresh air, but none of the buttons seemed to work.

"Look... brooding and silent might work in the movies, but I have to put this out there. If you don't put that damn stinking cigar out, I am going to lean over and vomit all over your lap. That is my first promise. Then? If you don't talk to me, I am going to scream so loudly you'll think your eardrums are about to burst. Try ignoring me? That one's a kicker. I'll simply punch you in that fat stomach that looks as though a years worth of sit ups would have little or no effect."

Anger had burned through the haze and she was in full fire. A slow clapping filled the car and the privacy panel in the car was lowered, revealing another man in the front.

"Bravo. I told you we made the right decision with this one, Petrov. She is priceless, is she not? Full of enthusiasm, spark and defiance. All the makings of an excellent journalist. One who'll tell our story just the way we want it told. With a large amount of drama and just the right amount of flare. Now, Petrov. Do as the lady says and put that cigar out. We don't want a mess in the car. Do we, Miss Harmon?"

This man was younger and his eyes held a hint of humour. She found herself responding to it in spite of herself, starved a little for company.

"Thank you. If that means anything to you? It's been a slightly... stressful... day."

"Yes I'm sure it has, and I apologise for that. We'll be at the location shortly and once the meeting has been concluded, you will be required to accompany us to a special... dinner."

"Are you kidding? Look at what I am wearing. I can't go into a restaurant dressed like this." She was panicking. The deal had been she would be escorted back to Atlantis at the conclusion of the meeting, and now dinner? That opened a whole new can of worms.

"Don't worry yourself about semantics. Appropriate garments and footwear have been organised in the correct sizes and there is a stylist standing by who will ensure that you are suitably presentable to meet some of our more... favoured... members."

She sunk down a little in the seat, realising that the rules of the game had just changed. She would have to adjust her game play accordingly and it seemed as though she would get to meet more members of the group than they had originally thought. Unease was an insistent finger down her spine. If they were prepared to show her as much as they seemed about to, then they would go to all lengths to ensure that the information she received was not passed on to the wrong parties.

The car stopped and the driver quickly exited the car to open hers. She stepped out, breathing fresh air once again and took long deep breaths to expell the smell of the cigar, that seemed to cling to her clothing. Her friend from the front seat was at her side immediately, and he took her arm as an old fashioned suitor would do and led her into a back entrance, up a fire escape and it was only a matter of minutes before he was knocking on the door of a nondescript hotel room.

She had tried to look sureptitiously around, to see if she could locate any of the plants that General O'Neill had tried to arrange. The coridoor had been empty and as they hadn't come through the main entrance, Nicole had seen no one. It seemed that they had taken more than adequate security precautions of their own.

The room she stepped into was no different than any other hotel room, other than the fact it was inhabited by two men who sat in chairs alongside the small dining table. One was extremely dark skinned and wore a business suit and the second man was of asian descent. _Multi national... how many am I going to meet tonight. What sort of information is going to come to pass?_

Her escort pushed her down onto the bed and held out his hand. She looked down at it, not comprehending and when he clicked his fingers impatiently, she realised that he was waiting for the flashdrive.

"But first, you will be searched for weapons and wires. We have a woman here who will do that, to spare you any embarassment. She will also organsise your attire for the dinner that I mentioned. Please go with her while we load this into our computer. It will give us time to go through your work to date, while she prepares you. Once you are ready, we will leave for the dinner. No discussions will occur here in this room."

Her heart sank. Even if the General had managed to get some sort of listening devices in here, they would be useless. It appeared that these people were going to be ahead of them every step of the way.

The woman waited in the adjoining room. She was quiet, but methodical and the thorough search that Nicole had to endure had her cheeks burning in embarassment. It seemed as though they had not managed to spare her that after all. Once happy that Nicole did not possess either a wire or a weapon on any part of her body, the woman held up a very very short sparkling dress, that had so little fabric Nicole wondered how much of her body it would cover. She didn't have long to find out. It stopped at the top of her thighs and dipped so low in the back that she knew she would be constantly worrying whether her underpants would be showing. The front was just as plunging and her hands automatically grabbed for the top to pull it higher, but she found her hands pushed away. It appeared that this was how the dress was meant to be worn. In public.

_Dear god... they expect me to walk out of here dressed like this? Are they kidding? I look like some sort of hooker... oh crap. So glad John's not here to see this sight... he'd either laugh or cry. I look ridiculous._

But the woman wasn't finsished. Five inch heels were produced and Nicole groaned in pain when her feet were pushed into them. Oh the pain of it, and she knew that there was no way in hell that she would be able to walk more than a few steps in these towering stilettos of pain. Then came the hair and makeup. She was poked, puffed, sprayed and teased and painted with so much colour that she felt like an artists palette. When she was finally pushed in front of a mirror her eyes widened in shock. It was a stranger staring back at her.

When she walked back into the main room she caught the frank appreciation in the younger man who had escorted her into the building. His eyes ran up and down the length of her fully exposed legs and the look in his eyes made her blood run cold. She hoped she would not have to spend too much time in his company this evening.

"Well... look at that. You did manage to polish up rather nicely. I suspected that may well be the case. Your bone structure is exquisite and when the base ingredients are in place, the rest is just decoration. You, my dear – are simply stunning and will be a most decorative asset to our little dinner tonight."

"Look... whatever your name is. Compliments aside, what the hell am I doing here? My understanding of this meeting was to pass on what I had done to date so that you could authorise me to continue, and to get information on what you intended to do with me once the assignment was finished. Dinner? That wasn't part of the deal."

"That may be Miss Harmon, but you need to eat, I'm sure. And we have a scheduled dinner that will allow you to meet some of the other members of our... group. They are all most anxious to meet you. We have been priveleged to meet some of the members of your family..."

Anger blossomed and her eyes sent out sparks. "My family? Damn it – you stay the hell away from my family! I'm doing what you asked me to do... all of it. You touch my family... even one hair on their body, and I'll bring your little group crashing down to the ground so hard you'll wonder just what hit you. Your deal is with me – leave them the hell out of it!"

The younger man smiled and moved towards her, reaching out a hand to run down her hair. "Such fire, such passion... but misplaced perhaps?" His hand had continued down and now rested at her waist. She shrugged out of his grip, but his hand bit in harder, pinching painfully and she gasped.

"Yes, that's much better. You need to calm down. You'll learn what you need to learn, all in good time. We have our own agenda and we go at our own pace. No more talking in here. It is time to leave for the dinner. You'll be returned to the SGC after the dinner and you will go immediately back to Atlantis. Do not pass go, do not collect two hundred dollars..." He laughed a little, pleased with his own wit and she looked at him with wide frightened eyes.

_He's crazy. Really crazy... as in a real head case. Play along with him Nic – or this guy is gonna hurt you. He's got no conscience, no soul. His eyes are dead... and if you don't play nice? You will be too. _


	37. Chapter 37 A dinner in those circles

CHAPTER 37 – A DINNER IN THOSE CIRCLES

She was escorted back to the car and they were followed by the two men who had been in the room with her. The cigar smoker – Petrov? - was still in the car. He had not bothered to get out when they arrived, instead was talking on a cell phone and she listened carefully. He was not speaking English, and she struggled to recognise the language immediately, thinking it was perhaps Russian or a derivative of it. He spoke fast and waved his hands around incessantly, and the tone was angry. She shuddered. This was certainly not a man she wanted to cross.

The restaurant was fifteen minutes away, and she used this time to try and plan her moves. They approved of what she had done so far, that much seemed clear. That meant she would be allowed to continue and John and the team could chip away at finding out who was behind all this. The Russians – yes. The younger man, he spoke with an English accent and there was definitely one of asian descent. The darker skinned man – he had not spoken so she had yet to work out his nationality. He looked Indian perhaps, but didn't want to generalise.

When they arrived at the restaurant, it was her escort who once again opened the door and it was also he who helped her out of the car, waiting until she was stable on the high stilettos that she had no experience walking in. He tucked her tightly beside him, and she had to endure it. If she didn't she would surely break her ankle.

They were shown to a back room of the restaurant, completely private. So far, she had seen no one since leaving the SGC, that was not involved with this group. That fact disconcerted her more than anything. Seated at a table, were four other men and she almost tripped over her feet when she recognised one of them.

At one end of the table sat the Director of the FBI.

_The proverbial crap just hit the fan... oh boy. What are you going to do with that information... oh holy crap on a cracker. This is unbelievable... oh, the story I will write, once we have them cornered. This is going to be huge._

He nodded at her and she could only stare, until she was prodded uncomfortably in the back and urged into a seat opposite him. Disbelief had her stumbling slightly and she wondered what other surprises were going to come her way tonight.

"Thank you for joining us, and may I say? You look lovely. You will make a most delightful frontperson for our group. PR is such an integral part of business management in today's business world and you, my dear? Will be a perfect addition. May I get you something to drink?"

She found herself staring in fascination at him, his words so normal, disussing something so abhorent. She shook her head in answer to his question, finding momentarily, that she was unable to formulate words coherently. A glass of wine appeared in front of her, and she looked up in surprise at the waiter who stood beside her. It seemed that her wishes were to be mostly ignored, should they not agree with their own.

Dish after dish was placed in front of her, and the englishman seated beside her brought her wine glass to her lips repeatedly. It seemed churlish to refuse, and the wine, combined with the medication in her system was a heady combination and soon she found her mind clouded as though it was filled with cotton wool. She felt the englishman's hand upon her knee, climbing higher and it took an extraordinary amount of effort to push it away, until even that seemed too much and the next time it returned, she simply left it there.

Words floated around her, sometimes addressed directly to her – and these she fought to understand and process. They spoke about the weapons and she tried to follow, but she was tired. So very tired. Her duties in the future were discussed and when she tried to protest, albeit a little feebly, she was reminded in no uncertain terms that her family and friends would remain safe only as long as her agreement with them continued.

Words finally broke through the fog and she pushed to her feet, upsetting her glass of wine and stumbling as the unfamiliar shoes barely held her steady.

"Why me... why did you pick me? I have no argument with you in the past. I have always done my job to the best of my ability and to do this? Surely you can see that I have always held my integrity to be of the highest standard. I'm not like any of you..." She stumbled again, and the englishman pulled her down, causing her to tumble into his lap. He held her there, hand stroking her thigh and she shuddered, trying to pull away.

"Hush... you're getting upset. You should feel honoured that we have chosen you for this task. You were chosen because of your moral standards, because of your integrity. We knew that once you found out what was going on out there, you would be outraged and happy to expose these people. Arrogant... all of them.

She looked at him aghast. _Arrogrant? Colonel John Sheppard? Colonel Samantha Carter? Do you people have any idea what they have done for this world? Arrogance is in this room, in spades._

She had to force the words out. "The weapons you wish to buy. The weapons you have commissioned to have built for you? What do you intend to do with them? Will you use them to terrorise the rest of the world, make them compliant with whatever plan you have in mind? Or will you simply sit on your thrones of power and look down upon your underlings and feel priveleged to do nothing to get everything? What makes any of you different from Hitler?"

The Russian had surged to his feet, anger on his face. "Silence!" He spoke in heavily accented English. "You will do exactly what we tell you and I would suggest changing your attitude or your family will suffer. Our plans will proceed exactly as they are intended to. You will bring down the stargate programme and your family will live. Then you will take your place as head of public relations in our organisation. This is not negotiable."

The FBI man cast a derisive look in the Russian's direction. "Be quiet Petrov. Scare tactics will not work on a reporter of Miss Harmon's caliber, it will simply make her dig her toes in and do the opposite. Nicole? May I call you that?" He didn't wait for an answer, just reached across and refilled her wine and waited while the englishman picked up her glass and held it to her lips, waiting until she had taken several small sips. "You will be well compensated and your family will be... taken care of."

_Different words, same meaning. Does he take me for a fool?_

The alcohol wound through her system and she could not recall whether she had eaten very much of the dinner that had passed before her with dizzying speed. She did not recall either, having actually picked up the wine glass to drink. It seemed always to be placed at her lips and as the evening had worn on, she had simply sipped whenever it was placed there. It seemed that free will had been taken away without her even realising that it was gone.

The Director of the FBI addressed her again. "We are not such bad people Nicole, you'll come to realise that. There is so much confusion in the world right now, we simply seek to end that confusion by forming one world wide group, one ruling power. Each country controlling a small parcel of the world? Blocking trade, withholding important supplies because of a squabble with another country? This has been going on for centuries and has simply bred distrust and mismanagement. It can't be allowed to go on any longer. We are taking away the reins from those who perpetuate this weak and ineffectual method of government. One power. One world."

The englishman – she had still to learn his name – finally allowed her to leave his lap and retain her own chair. She spoke and her voice was not recognisable to her ears.

"One world? A noble thought... but how do you seek to control that one world? Through tyranny, through fear... do you really think that is any better than what we have now? How many are involved in your group... when will I be privy to that information?"

It was the englishman who had the answer for her. "This is just a station along the way for you Nicole. It is not until you reach your destination that you will meet us... all. We are many and have been slowly cultivating members for a long time. We chose you two years ago, after you had published a particularly provocative story regarding the orphanages in eastern europe. That showed compassion and a commitment that we needed. Each of our group has been chosen. We began with a small, tight group that held one vision for the future of this world. It has been a long, but extremely satisfying road and we are nearly there. Funding is always an issue, and the United States governement, along with some of the other so called superpowers, spend far too much on the space programmes. Our future is not in space. One world. That is sufficient for us if it is maintained and controlled properly."

Nicole's voice was barely a whisper. "The weapons... fear tactics..."

The englishman was surprised. "No, Nicole. Insurance. Protection. Unlike the group you have been working with in Atlantis, we have no wish to cultivate relations with outside worlds. Should they decide to come, we will be prepared. And not welcoming at all."

Again, she attempted to push through the fog, but her limbs felt heavy and was wondered briefly if something had been put into her wine. She was sure that she hadn't had that much to drink, but suddenly, she was losing clarity and the room was tilting a little.

"Have any of your been out there?" It was a struggle to formulate the words. "It is magnificent and the people I met so far, on other worlds? Welcoming... and with much to teach us. Surely you can see that?"

"Our world is starving, Nicole – because of mismanagement. We cannot allow others to come and undermine what our group attempt to rebuild. Our world will be self sufficient and there will be food for all. You think of us as arrogant, I can see that in your face. But it is simply self preservation. This world will self destruct in a short time if it is left to continue on the path that has been set for it. Humanity at the moment, is a greedy runaway train that has no thought for the future. Our mandate is to protect what is ours, that is all."

"Why force people to join your group then? Surely there is someone like me out there, who would come forth volunarily to do the job you want me to do."

"Each member is chosen. We wanted you. End of story. If the chosen one resists, then pressure is asserted, on their families – yes? But eventually? All of our members have come to … agree... with our methodology."

The room swam then, and she found herself falling, darkness blinking on the edges of her subconscious. She felt arms pick her up, voices, the sensation of movement... perhaps a car. Then speed... then nothing.


	38. Chapter 38 The waiting game

CHAPTER 38 – THE WAITING GAME

He did not do waiting well. Letting her walk through that stargate had taken an interminable amount of strength but had known that if she didn't do it, they'd be cut off at the knees and there would be no more open channels of communication coming their way. Not to mention the fact that her family would be in danger. He had remained in the control room for a short time afterward, standing behind the gate technician as though she would magically reappear through that gate again, then as soon as he had realised that the technician was eyeing him with more than just a hint of trepidation, he resigned himself to the waiting game and wandered off in search of something to fill his time in.

_Mission reports outstanding...ah no. Run? Maybe... Go down and see what Rodney is up to in his lab... nah... he'll turn me into some sort of random experiment. Fishing? Uh, no. Ronon... workout, sparring... yeah, that'll do it. Maybe he'll knock some sort of clarity into me. Yeah._

Resolved now, he headed down to Ronon's quarters and found the big man sitting on his bed, staring down at a small trinket he held in his hands.

"Hey buddy. Fancy pounding the crap outta me? I can't get my head in the game at the moment, for obvious reasons. Need some action. You game?"

Ronon looked up at him and John saw something in his eyes that had his gaze dropping down to the trinket in his hand.

"You ok, Ronon? What's that?"

"Teyla found it. On one of the trading missions. P1934T."

"So...?" John was confused.

"It's Satedan. I know who it belonged to."

"Oh... sorry man. Really. Is that what you and Teyla were arguing about the other day?"

"Yeah... I wanted to go back to the planet, and find out where it came from... who had it. She doesn't agree. Thinks it's a waste of time. I think she knows something about it... but she's not saying."

John, in spite of his own worries right now, sat down on the bed beside Ronon. The Satedan had to be hurting. Almost an entire race of people wiped out. His family, his friends. That had to hurt.

"I'll talk to Teyla, Ronon. Find out what the full story is. Likely she's protecting you somehow. You know how Teyla is... she probably thinks you're happy here, now. And why spoil things by giving you information that may only hurt you. Don't be too hard on her, she cares a lot for you Ronon, as she does for all of us. She's proved that over and over."

"Yeah, I know Sheppard. When she handed this to me... hell. I was pretty hard on her."

"So, make it up to her. She'll understand. This is Teyla we're talking about. Come on... I need to pound something. Let's go a few rounds."

"Sounds like a good idea. But the pounding? You'll be the one taking it." His mood a little lighter, he placed the trinket on the bedside table, but John saw the look in his eyes and filed that away in his mind. He'd authorise a little trip back to P1934T and maybe do some investigating. Maybe, just maybe... they could find a little peace for Ronon.

Two hours later, sweating and bloodied, John collapsed on the floor and found Teyla looking down at him.

"It appears that punishment of some sort is what you were looking for, John?" Teyla smiled, but her eyes flicked to Ronon's and John saw the slight change come into them. Resolve filled him, and he rolled to his feet, groaning a little at the aches and pains that Ronon had inflicted on him.

"Enough you guys. This ends now. Sort out your crap – this sort of dissention is not good in a team. Ronon? You have an issue with Teyla. Talk to her now. Don't sulk and don't walk away. Let's get this finished so that we can move on. And that's a damn order!"

Ronon and Teyla looked at him startled, then at each other. Ronon's eyes still held that measure of distrust and Teyla looked angry. John walked up to them, clapped a hand on each of their shoulders and moved them closer together.

"You know I'm right. Sort it out, I mean it. Teyla? If you have information about that trinket... and yeah, Ronon showed it to me and gave me the abridged version... tell him, regardless of what you think the consequences might be. And Ronon? Listen to her. Don't get pissy, and let her finish what she has to say. Do I need to play referee, or can you sit down like civilised adults and have a conversation that doesn't end in bloodshed – hmmm?"

It was Teyla who dropped her eyes first. "I am sorry Ronon, if it appeared as though I was withholding information. You are correct, I did discover something while we were there, but I took it upon myself to hide this from you, in order to protect you. I also wanted some time to look into it a little further and have arranged a meeting with an old friend on one of the Athosian trading planets. I wanted to proceed with that meeting before discussing anything with you John. I truly apologise if I have handled this incorrectly."

"Ahhh Teyla... communication within a group is paramount. You know that. Yes, you should have told Ronon and I immediately, but I do understand your reasons for holding back. When is this meeting?"

"Next week John, and Ronon? If John agrees, I should like you to accompany me. Perhaps you will have some answers, although I feel in my heart that they will not be good ones."

"We'll all go Teyla. We're a team, and Ronon is an integral part of this team. This concerns him and his world, so we all go, and we'll all get those answers."

He had watched the anger flare in his friends eyes when he heard that Teyla had indeed withheld something, but the anger was tempered now, and he hid a smile when Teyla simply stepped up to him and put her arms around him. Ronon was not big on emotion, but he had a soft spot for Teyla, hell... John thought that maybe there was more than just a soft spot there, but so far? Neither of them had acknowledged that, and he would leave it for now. That was up to them to discover. Although he would certainly encourage it.

"Ok, so I'm beaten and a little raw. Thank you, Ronon Dexx! Those mission reports I need to catch up on? Can't seem to find any other excuse not to do them, so I'll leave you kids to making nice with each other, and enjoy the stimulation that creating a mission report that actually makes any sense, brings. Not! I'll let you guys know as soon as we have word from the SGC. Damn that mid way station... about time Rodney did something about shortening the time there... this day is going to go on forever..."

He left them, muttering to himself and Ronon and Teyla looked at each other. Teyla's arms were still placed on Ronon's and she saw him look down at them, then back into her eyes. Saw that small spark there and wondered if she should do something about fanning those embers. All in good time.

John got the call an hour into his mission reports. His radio activated and Sam's terse voice had him running to the control room. He was not alone in there. Rodney had arrived as had Ronon and Teyla and one look at Sam's face had John's heart racing just a little faster. If that was even possible.

"Damn it, Sam! Something's happened... what is it?"

"Calm down, John. It's not as bad as you think. They've made it to the SGC and Robert has just radioed in. She's on her way to the arranged meeting. A helicoptor picked her up and the instructions were clear. She was to go alone and to go immediately. She would be returned to the SGC and was to return immediately to Atlantis at the conclusion of the meeting. No time was given."

"Alone? She's gone alone? So... Robert?"

"He's waiting at the SGC for her to return. His instructions are to return here with her. That's all we know."

"Crap." John ran a hand through his hair, mentally trying to place himself in that helicoptor with her to give her some sort of support. "Please tell me that General O'Neill managed to get some eyes and ears in that hotel room."

"Wish I could John, but there was a small problem there also... The room number that Robert was given does not exist. They went through the reservation list with a fine tooth comb and nothing stood out. Nothing. And short of covering all the rooms... and it is a big hotel, no dice. There was no way he could authorise placing listening devices in every room. Constitutional rights... you know the story."

"So she's going in there with no backup, period."

"I don't think they will hurt her John. She's there because somehow, she has become an important part in their agenda. If she plays the game, she'll be fine. She's intelligent and not going to do any thing to jeopartise her life, nor our agenda. This is her field remember, she's played this game before, just not on this particular scale."

John was pacing the room now. "She's hot headed, stubborn and set on getting what she wants any way she can. She could bring them tumbling down in a heart beat. Without even thinking about it."

"So we trust her John. And wait."

And waiting was what he didn't do well.


	39. Chapter 39 Back from the brink of what?

CHAPTER 39 – BACK FROM THE BRINK OF WHAT?

He didn't sleep. Day gave way to night and the night wore on and on. He paced the coridoors of Atlantis and had to endure the sympathetic looks from those he passed. Most knew a little of what was going down. His team tried to give him what support they could, but as the hours ticked on and he waited for news, he had the sinking feeling that he had somehow lost her.

Communication from the SGC was ominously silent. It was midnight when he stormed into Sam's office and slumped down into a chair. Not even questioning why she was still awake and in her office at that hour.

"John... nice of you to visit... again..." Her voice held only mild sarcasm. She took in his tousled hair and crumpled clothes and the lines etched across his face. He had found himself in her office more than once during that evening and into the night, and she had tried to retain her patience with him, knowing what he must be going through. But patience was wearing just a little thin.

"What the hell is taking so long, Sam? I mean, over there? It's almost 2am Washington time. The meeting was supposed to start at 6pm. She should be back at the SGC by now."

"Maybe not, John. It's several hours by helo from Colorado to Washington, and we are assuming she'll be transported back to the SGC in the same way. The meeting could have gone on for several hours – it's unlikely she'll get back to the SGC before early morning. That's a realistic assumption. Go and get some rest John – please! You're making my office look damned untidy, and when she does come back, if you're in this same antsy frame of mind, you're likely to jump all over her and tempers will fly..."

"Rest? You have to be kidding me... the only way I'm gonna rest is if Carson knocks me out..."

"That may become an option... very soon..." Sam looked at him in amusement. "Go, John. Shut your eyes and try and get a little sleep. I'll be here, I'll keep the fire burning until she returns. Do I have to make that an order?"

He narrowed his eyes at her. "You can't order me to sleep..."

"Read your contract John... I can order you to do anything I damn well please. So...?"

"Crap..." He grumbled, but he did drag himself out of the chair and move slowly towards the door. "You'll call me...?"

"...As soon as I have any news, John. Of course."

He retired to his quarters and did lie down and try to sleep. At least he shut his eyes... But when he did, he saw her face. The expression when she had taken her into space for that first time, her laughter when she had managed to knock him to the ground with her self defence techniques. He knew that her job was really only just beginning. Taking the photos and writing the story... then the waiting game until she knew that General O'Neill and the team he had working earthside, could take them down.

He drifted then for a while and must have slept a little because when his radio activated he leapt out of bed suddenly, disorientated and confused and had to sit on the side of his bed with his head in his hands for a few precious moments, before remembering the events of earlier that night. Galvanised into action now, he raced to the control room and was met at the bottom of the stairs by Sam, who laid a hand on his arm.

"I need you to remain calm John, before I give you any news. Can you promise me that?"

"Damn it Sam! I'm not promising anything – for god's sake, tell me!" John's eyes were wild, and she increased the pressure on his arm and she motioned with her eyes to someone standing behind John. Ronon stepped up quickly and laid a hand on John's shoulder in case he needed to restrain him.

"It's not so bad John. She's back, at the SGC... just been delivered. She wasn't conscious when she arrived, it looked as though she may have been drugged. She arrived with clear instructions. No stopping, no passing go... she was to head straight back to Atlantis. Robert is bringing her back – they're at the mid way station now. She was conscious when she left the SGC, Jack says she doesn't look too good. Hopefully whatever it is will wear off while she's at the mid way station. They put her straight through the gate, as per instructions – but Jack did have time to grab some medication from the infirmary. Robert will give her something should she need it."

John sat down heavily on the steps. From relief or fear... he didn't know. "I'm gonna kill..."

Sam didn't let him finish. "Let's worry about taking them down first... we stick to the plan. Then I may find a way to get you into their cell... discreetly."

She said this last bit only partly in jest, then continued. "Robert had a little chat with Jack while he was waiting for her... he's been given some new orders... by the way, just so you know. He knew nothing about that solo trip to the meeting. His original instructions included accompanying her... it seems the group had a change of plans at the last minute. They wanted no witnesses - even one of their own. It seems that they are not so convinced of his loyalty to them. So they've exerted new pressure... Robert's got a sister who lives in Australia - he'd tried to keep her below the radar over the years, but they've tracked her down, and they've got her. Robert's got to stick to Nicole like glue, and if she shows any sign of cracking... he's been given several doses of a drug that Carson is going to run for us - likely the same drug that is in her system now. It will keep her... compliant. One of the reasons they want her kept here... to finish to story away from earth, keep her compliant and when the time is right, bring her back to earth and step gracefully into the limelight to take her place alongside the leaders of the group. To show her support for them, willingly... Robert thinks that long term exposure to this drug will leave her without any of her own will whatsoever. This group show no compunction whatsoever. If it appears that blackmail will not suffice, this drug is their backup plan - at least for those who are not willing players in their game."

John's face was like thunder. "Like a damn puppet. They'll hold the strings and she'll be useless without the puppet masters. They're worse than the wraith... at least they only do it to survive. Jesus, Sam... I need to...hit out at something. Damn it all to hell. How do I just sit here... knowing, waiting. Will she be the same person when she comes back? What the hell have they done to her... I need to..."

"...You need to take a deep breath and calm down. Because this anger of yours is on too short a fuse. Go blow it off a little... when she gets back, she'll need your support, not your anger."

He ran after that. It was the only thing left to do. And when he was done with that, he took an extremely long, extremely hot shower – as though he could wash the traces of corruption from his skin and somehow will away the atrocities that would surely come to light.

When the claxons sounded, signalling an offworld activation, John was in the gate room, along with Teyla, Ronon, Sam and Rodney. _Gang's all here..._ he thought somewhat irreverently. _Hope what comes through that gate is the same woman who left through it several hours ago... make that over a day ago... damn, an eternity._

She did step through, although not on her own. Held firmly in the grip of Robert, she stood a little uncertainly in bare feet and John's eyes widened in both alarm and consternation. He felt Ronon shift slightly beside him and heard Rodney's sharp intake of breath. She was attired in an extremely short, and extremely provocative dress, and while some thoughtful person had at least had the foresight to drape an olive green BDU jacket over her shoulders, there was more than enough flesh on display to tempt even the most celibate monk.

Her hair was in wild disarray around her face, and she looked... different. John peered closer and saw that she was wearing makeup – and a lot of it. Something he knew that she abhorred.

"John?" Her voice was small, and she stumbled a little as she tried to move away from Robert. Robert cast a hard look at John, and John read the message there - loud and clear. Robert had done his best. It had been out of his hands and he had his own demons to fight. John gave him a small nod before he took the last steps towards her and she was in his arms and there was so much flesh that he didn't quite know where to put his hands, in this very public forum at least.

"Hey... welcome back. You ok?" He kept his voice light, not really sure how to proceed and it was Sam who stepped up and her voice had Nicole pulling back a little from John's embrace and looking into her blue eyes. Sam saw immediately that some the of effect of whatever drug they had given her, was still in her system. Her eyes were not as sharp as usual and she clung to John as though she simply needed someone to hold her up. That was not the Nicole that they had come to know. That woman? She was fierce, a survivor and larger than life. They had taken a little something from her that night, and Sam's mouth tightened. If they had their way and their plan came to pass, then they would take a whole lot more. Her humanity. One look at John's face and she knew. That would never happen. He'd spend the rest of his life hunting them down and there would be no galaxy where they could hide. Sam kept her voice firm now as she looked at them.

"Nicole, priority right now? You need to go straight to the infirmary. Carson has been warned you'll be stopping in to pay him a little visit... until we know what is in your system, ok? If he gives you the all clear, then you're good to go, but Nicole? The final say is his... got that? Then rest. Lot's of rest I should imagine. Your story can wait for now."

A small hand reached out and opened, revealing a flashdrive in it's palm.

"I started making some notes... in the mid way station. Used their computer. Here... this will give you a heads up. Sorry if things get a little... blurred. Was an interesting... evening. Oh yeah...interesting."

She leaned back into John, sighing a little, feeling some lucidity come back to her, feeling a little of her humanity return as she felt the strong arms of her man wrap around her. She tipped her face up to his. "Any chance of a little food first? Kinda hungry... and can't really remember if I actually got to eat anything... interesting evening... did I mention that?"

"Yeah... kinda getting that, sweetheart. Um... I have to ask...what the hell are you wearing and why? Just had to get that out there..."

Rodney blushed, having been caught staring at her... assets... that were rather prominently on display and a bark of laughter erupted from Ronon. His voice was dry.

"Not that we're complaining about the view Nicole... unlike Sheppard here, we've only seen you in jeans and tshirt... this whole new side of you? I'm liking it a lot!"

His comment received a warning glare from both John and Teyla and a laugh from Sam. Nicole chuckled a little and John was relieved to see a little more colour coming into her cheeks. She had the strength to fight that damn crap they'd put in her system, and he mentally applauded her for having a strength that most men would not find inside them.

"They considered this appropriate attire for the formal dinner I was required to attend... all part of the long story I'll tell you all later...I knew there was a reason I was more comfortable in jeans... ughhh, that englishman's hands... yuck, I can still feel them..."

"Excuse me...?" John's eyebrows had risen and his face had darkened and Sam was rather relieved that earth was several million light years away. The Colonel had murder in his eyes. "He touched you...? That's it Sam... you told me to bank it down... not gonna happen. Bastard. He's mine...got that. At the end of all this...he's mine..."

"S'ok John! Yeah, he tried to put his disgusting hands on me... but I got him sorted... I think? Something was off, made me think things that weren't really there, so it's all a little hazy... but I can remember the feel of his hands. Disgusting, and John... FYI? At the end of all this... I'll be the one dishing out punishment to that creep. Anyway, I want to get back into something more comfortable, so can I get the visit to the infirmary moved up a notch... and you can quit ogling me in this dress Rodney! It's going into the rubbish..."

Blushing, Rodney muttered something that went unheard by the others, and turned to leave. Torn between anger and laughter now, and a lot of relief to boot, John pulled her back into his arms for a hard, tight hug, before swatting her on her almost exposed backside that was fortunately covered by part of the BDU jacket.

"Ok, doc it is and if he gives you the all clear?... then food. After that... you're mine. No more questions, no more stories. Bed."

And that it itself, curled delicious fingers of warmth into her stomach, and lower.


	40. Chapter 40 Solace is found in photos

CHAPTER 40 – SOLACE IS FOUND IN PHOTOS

"This makes for some interesting reading, Nicole. I'm surprised, given your state of... artificial stimulation... that you were able to take in even this much? This gives us an excellent point of reference, a worthwhile meeting indeed."

John's eyes darkened and his fist clenched and this time the action of Nicole placing her hand over his, did not dispell the anger that coursed through him. He had read the report as well. He had gotten out of bed long before she had, a little restless and unable to sleep. He had found Sam in her office and together they had read the report. And both had sat back more than a little breathless by what they had read.

The Director of the FBI. That gave them their first name. Jonathon Winters. John flicked his gaze now to the whiteboard that Sam had in her office and the notes that had been made. They were building a pyramid of names, and Jonathon Winter's was placed in a line third from the top. Nicole had quantified that she thought he was one of the bigger fish... but not the biggest. In her opinion there were at least two more rungs up the ladder, and they had left the top two lines free accordingly.

The had tracked the Englishman, and the Russian and were still working on the other two men who Nicole had described. The Englishman was a House of Commons Lord – a high ranking government official who had opposed trade with the Middle East during the past twelve months. They had his file pulled, and John had spent some time going through it. This was the man who had dared to lay a hand on his woman. This was the man he would pay a visit to when the time was right.

The Russian, Petrov Chenovack – Russian military. His file was light, information coming out of the Soviet was still a little sketchy – but at least they had a name for their board.

Sam had made careful notes on the whiteboard in bullet point format, detailing what Nicole had learnt the previous night at the dinner. She had sent the information back to the SGC and General O'Neill was already wading through red tape to bring some more names to the table. They would lay mines under each name and detonate simultaneously. One hit, home run, perfect score.

He had spent two hours with Sam, and feeling a little more as though progress was being made, he had returned to his quarters to find his bed empty – the only sign that she had been there was the dress crumped unceremoniously in his rubbish bin. A moment's panic, and he had quickly pushed it down. Space. She needed space, and he knew better than anyone when to back off.

That hadn't stopped him looking for her, but he hadn't had to go far. Hair freshly washed and a camera at her face, a face now scrubbed clean of all the makeup, and looking much more like the woman that he was rapidly falling in love with. _Love, _ thought John, a little taken back by the ease with which the word had popped into his mind. _No, surely not love... something less sinister. Respect, serious like, yeah... that was more like it... no pun intended. No, not love. Love is forever, hearts and flowers. Not my style... not her's either? But she was with someone before... for a long time. So, perhaps hearts and flowers is what she wants? Damn... I'm confused. _

"John?" She had heard him come out onto the balcony and had watched puzzled, as something had moved across his face – an expression that she did not recognise, one that scared her a little. She was on the top balcony of the highest tower in Atlantis, looking down over the still ocean and capturing a flock of sea birds that traversed the sky in a large formation.

He continued to stare at her for a moment, and she felt that he was not really looking at her, but trying to work out something in his mind. His eyes cleared then, and he smiled – moving quickly towards her. He moved in behind her and wrapped his arms tightly around her stomach, pulling her back hard against him so that she felt his arousal immediately.

"You shouldn't have left the bed so early... I could have done something about that..." He voice was cheeky and he rasped his chin over her cheek, feeling the scrape of his beard over her skin.

"Ouch... don't you have a shave once a day rule – or something?" she grumbled good naturedly.

"Someone woke up a little grumpy it seems... and as for 'doing something about that' – there's still time, Miss Harmon. It's barely..." he consulted his watch, "...9am. I've just come from Sam's office and she wants to touch base with the General before we all get together, so after lunch we'll meet back. We've started piecing things together... and I went through your report. I won't pull any punches, Nic. I wanted to kill that bastard. And I may still do that... when I get my hands on him."

"Yeah, I am a little grumpy. Something to do with gate travel, a long helicoptor ride, enduring the meeting from hell, being groped by some stuffy englishman, drugged... oh, and did I mention a ride back in some sort of aircraft that went so fast I have a vague recollection of vomiting. All over someones shoes. Don't ask me who it was... someone who escorted me from the restaurant to the transport.. I think. It's a little hazy from there. Oh, I forgot to add to the list... I woke up this morning and the bed was empty. So, yeah... a little grumpy!"

Her backside moved deliberately and rotated against his groin area and he groaned, muttering into her hair. "Is that punishment of some sort? 'Cause, I need to warn you, I'm highly trained to withstand torture in most forms."

"Most...Colonel Sheppard?"

She moved some more, then gasped herself as his hand that had been banding her stomach, dipped lower and cupped her there, radiated warmth and arousal through her body.

"Oh, so not fair..."

"Fair has nothing to do with it... you started it." His hand continued to stroke and she dropped her head back against his shoulder, allowing him access to her neck, which he nuzzled greedily.

"So.. who's gonna finish it? I'm really not the patient sort... Colonel."

"Yeah, I got that much, babe. I'm pulling rank here... we're going, now..."

It was after lunch when they returned to Sam's office as scheduled, and Nicole's mood was far less... grumpy. And if anyone noticed the additional spring in the Colonel's step, then they just put it down to him having a good breakfast... or something.

Unfortunately his mood had darkened a little at the mention of what was in the report.

Sam quickly brought the others up to speed and by the time she had finished, Lorne's face had darkened with anger as well and Sam knew that she had another champion at her beck and call.

Nicole gazed thoughtfully at the whiteboard, then in an inexplicable move, brought the camera up to the board, and just looked through the viewfinder.

"Nic...what are you doing?"

"Perspective, John. I see things differently through this lens. You should know that by now. For me, yes – it's about taking photos, but it's also something more. This camera, this lens? Puts a level of distance between me and the actual image. It allows me to see things clearer. With clarity. Does that make sense?"

She saw Rodney shaking his head and knew that the scientist in him would never accept such a whimsical notion and she attempted to explain the scientific side of her theory.

"I know this seems an anomaly to you Rodney, but think about it in these terms. Simplicity is the key to most good pictures. The simpler and more direct a picture is, the clearer and stronger is the resulting statement. For example – as a photographer , instead of photographing an entire area that would confuse the viewer, I will frame in on some important element within the area. Second, I will select different viewpoints or camera angles. Move around the scene or object being photographed. View the scene through the camera viewfinder. Look at the foreground and background. Try high and low angles as well as normal eye-level viewpoints. Evaluate each view and angle. Only after considering all possibilities would I take the picture. See beyond and in front of your subject. Be sure there is nothing in the background to distract the viewer's attention from the main point of the picture. Likewise, check to see there is nothing objectional in the foreground to block the entrance of the human eye into the picture.

A last point of simplicity, Rodney-tell only one story. Ensure there is only enough material in the picture to convey one single idea. Although each picture is composed of numerous small parts and contributing elements, none should attract more of the viewer's attention than the primary object of the picture. The primary object is the reason the picture is being made in the first place; therefore, all other elements should merely support and emphasize the main object. Do not allow the scene to be cluttered with confusing elements and lines that detract from the primary point of the picture. Select a viewpoint that eliminates distractions so the principal subject is readily recognized. When numerous lines or shapes are competing for interest with the subject, it is difficult to recognize the primary object or determine why the picture was made.

That, Rodney – is what I'm doing when I look at the board through my lens. Removing the clutter. And you know what I came up with? That line... the one above the FBI director? That belongs to US military."

John's startled glance was on her in seconds. "You know this... how?"

"By removing the clutter. Keeping the picture simple. If there is a large weapons deal coming up on the table, then military will be involved. I don't think they are at the top. But they will be damn close. Bet on it..."

Sam was nodding thoughtfully. "Makes sense Nicole... I don't know that I'd manage to pick that up by looking through your... lens... but whatever works is fine by me. Don't suppose you can throw some names our way... ?"

"Does the name … Fallon... ring any bells?" She threw it into the mix innocently enough and again John's startled eyes were on her.

"James Fallon? Homeland Security? Damn... ex military... You're sure about that, Nicole?"

"I may have been under the effect of some sort of narcotic, but a part of my brain must have stayed switched on, and as you know? I have a damn fine memory. That name came up more than once, and if I were you... I'd pencil him into that second line. For starters."

"Damn...I'm starting to see why these guys want you. You make connections, and piece together puzzles with extreme clarity, given that you were a little under the weather last night..." John was incredulous at what she had given them.

"Damn straight, Colonel. Now, I have a camera here that is calling my name, and photos being my specialty, if I can please be excused from this meeting for now, and could I possibly appropriate a jumper... oh, and if you don't want me to fly it myself... maybe a pilot to go with it? Anyone up for the job?"

And just like that the meeting was over. Both Lorne and Sheppard falling over themselves to offer their piloting services and Ronon chuckling quietly to himself. Life had certainly gotten more interesting since Miss Nicole Harmon, photographer – had arrived in Atlantis.


	41. Chapter 41 Anniversary

CHAPTER 41 – ANNIVERSARY

Courtesy of General O'Neill, they had managed to fill in several more names on their pyramid. He had pulled every stop to look into both the outgoing and incoming communication of Kevin Fallon, including email and all encrypted communication and while most of it was well hidden from even the General's prying eyes, he was able to get his hands on some that managed to fill in some of the blanks.

Those blanks included US military, just as Nicole had surmised. Four names. One of them a General. Fortunately not a personal friend of General O'Neill's, and not one he had dealings with in the past. The other three were ex military, now involved in private industry, with one of them working on producing one of the components used for manufacturing parts on the Prometheus. The lanes on this particular information highway suddenly cleared.

Essentially, the pyramid was starting to take shape and that left General O'Neill with the very real probability that they would be successful in bringing it down. Once and for all.

Ronon had been antsy and had eventually pestered John into taking the team out on a mission. His mandate was still to kick wraith ass, and so far, they hadn't been doing a lot of that lately. While he was happy enough to help out where he could with the earth based conspiracy, he still had a mission of his own and it was time to remind John of that.

Several days after Nicole had returned from the meeting on earth, John organised for his team to visit P2B239, a planet where wraith activity had stepped up over the past two months. They had received word some time ago by the elders of the main settlement that they had endured two cullings in the space of three months and while they had plans in place to avoid the cullings, having built secure places to hide many years ago, they were concerned at the frequency of the wraith visits and had asked the Lantiens for help.

Sam had put this request on the back burner, however now seemed a good time to step up and respond to their request. Ronon needed some action, and Teyla too, needed to take part in a mission that would help rid this galaxy of the wraith. On behalf of the Athosian people, she had chosen to be a part of John's team to enable her people to have a chance to one day be free of wraith domination.

Under no circumstances was Nicole allowed to go on that mission, photographs or not. The morning before they were to leave, they had had an argument. A strengthening in their relationship had been noted by Ronon and Teyla and she had moved into his quarters. They were however, both very stubborn, and did not always see eye to eye on matters concerning Nicole's security. John wanted her wrapped in cotton wool as far as she was concerned, and Nicole was far too much of a risk taker as far as John was concerned. So... stale mate. He had told her the previous morning that he would be going to P2B239 with his team the following day and she had asked... no, demanded... that he take her with them. She had argued that part of her mission, was to photograph the wraith.

"Damn it John! Will you stop treating me like a baby. I have only a few shots of the wraith, and that was while I was lying on the damn ground about to get eaten... or whatever it is they do... by them. I need an opportunity to take some good shots, I need to get up close and personal... so to speak."

"No... No... oh, and did I mention... No!" He stood with his hand on his hips near the bed. Huffing an impatient breath, he glared at her back as she turned around on the balcony, tossing her long hair over her shoulder and in spite of himself, he felt that instant arousal, that need to throw her over his shoulder and toss her down on the bed. And get rid of that needy feeling inside of him, that seemed to take over whenever he looked at her.

She turned back to him, and he could see that she was furious. She had been bad tempered most of the previous day. Snapping for no reason, and distant at other times, and he knew that something was going on inside her, but short of tipping her upside down and shaking it out of her, he had to wait until she was ready to tell him.

"If this was... us... back on earth? You'd have no choice. My job was dangerous at times. It involved going into situations that wasn't always safe... hell, most of the time I was flying by the seat of my pants. But it's what I do. Just the same as this is what you do. How would you feel if I told you not to go on that mission, because I was worried for your safety..?"

"That's not the same, and you know it!"

"Yes it is John... this is your job... but it's also mine."

She had stormed out of the room then, and he had sat down abruptly on the bed and dropped his head into his hands. She was volatile, stubborn, hot tempered and sometimes without conscience. But damn it, he was in love with her. Yeah, he could admit that to himself now. Head over heels in love. With the most impossible woman in the whole damn universe. Half of the time she made him feel like a king, as though he could rule the world. The other half of the time? He wanted to put his hands around her neck and throttle her. Was that love? God help him if it was.

He gave her some time before he went looking for her. Amend that. He gave himself some time. To calm down and make sure he was not bringing anger her way when he eventually found her. She was not in her usual hiding places, and she had a few. But over the last few weeks he had discovered most of them, and when he had not found her after two hours of searching, he began asking around.

The gate technician was the one to give him the bad news.

"She left in a jumper, Sir. An hour ago. Said that she had your 'blessing'."

He said the last bit a little nervously. The look on the Colonel's face was intimidating and he had the sudden feeling that he had done the wrong thing.

"Blessing? Blessing? Why the hell would I give her my blessing?"

"Sir...?"

"Never mind, airman. Where did she go?"

Sam had entered the control room and raised her eyebrows in question.

"John? Problem?"

"Yeah... 5"2 and 100 pounds. Give or take. That sort of problem."

Sam sighed. "What's she done now, John?"

"Taken a damn jumper. Where?" He directed this last question to the airman.

"Sir, she said she had something she had to do. She carried a bunch of flowers..."

John's eyebrows drew together ominously. "Flowers? Why the hell would she be carrying flowers?"

Sam's puzzled expression suddenly cleared as something occurred to her. "Airman, what is the date today?"

The airman looked up at her in surprise. "Ah, it's June 22nd ma'am."

"Sam? What significance is the date?" John was watching her closely.

"It's her anniversary, John. One year since Ben Masters died. I remember the date because I was reading the article last night and I recall thinking that I must say something to Nicole, in case she wanted to do something particular as a memorial."

"Ah crap... that'll explain the mood yesterday, and the blow up this morning... it wasn't just about the mission tomorrow. Crap, Sam. I blew it again. I should have known..."

"She should have told you, John. Don't be too hard on herself. Airman?"

He looked at the two Colonel's, feeling a little lost with the direction of the conversation. "Yes, ma'am?"

"Where do you think she's gone?"

"Uh, ma'am – I think she said something about climbing a mountain... at least that's what it sounded like."

"Sam? She wouldn't go any further than the mainland, would she?"

Sam shook her head. "You know her better than I do – there's a mountain of sorts on the mainland – didn't you point it out to her when you took her over there to look a the caves?"

Suddenly relieved he nodded. It made sense to him now. She gone to climb a mountain, to sit at the top and remember the man who had died in her arms And today of all days, was not one she should be alone.

Nicole had gone to do just that. She had only given a brief thought to John's anger when she had taken the jumper. Her mood was now, and she would deal with anything else later. That was how she worked, and it would do for today as well. She'd landed the jumper in the same place that John had taken her to the caves, and taking the small posy of flowers she had managed to put together, a bottle of water and her camera, she heaved a deep breath and starting at the base of the mountain, had simply put one foot in front of the other and begun the long climb.

The sun had risen high in the sky and she was almost at the top when she saw another jumper come in to land beside the one she had flown. She's known he'd eventually work it out, but she tuned him out for now. This moment was for Ben, and his memory – and as she cleared the top of the mountain, the vista spread out around her took her breath away. Putting the flowers down gently she raised her camera and did what she did best. Took photos until the pain that had begun to pool inside her, seeped away, and the tears began to fall.

"Aahh, Ben. These last photos are for you... my legacy." She paused a moment, bringing her camera down from her face. " Did I tell you I met someone? Hell, I'm sure you already know... he's special Ben... really special. And makes me feel things I didn't think I'd feel again after you left me. I miss you Ben..." Her voice hitched then, but she pushed a smile throught the pain, feeling that he was near, was listening somehow. "Tell me.. what's it like.. where you are? Do you still think about me?"

She picked up the flowers which had begun to wilt in the heat and standing up, she drew back her arm and threw them as far as she could.

Head bowed, she said a small prayer. Not to the man up there, but to whatever fate had brought a new love into her life.

"Goodbye Ben... take care of yourself...I'll never forget you" She felt a slight breeze then, and something whispered past her cheek and she could almost hear a delighted laugh that floated away in the air and she knew that he had gone.

Turning she saw him. John. Standing there watching her... waiting.

She ran towards him and threw herself into his arms, knowing he would catch her without doubt. As he buried his face in her hair she felt his shuddering breath and knew that Ben had given her clarity, as he had always done. He had also given her his blessing.

"You ok, Nic?... I'm sorry sweetheart... I didn't know. Sam told me, I should have known..."

"It's ok, John... really. I'm ok. I said goodbye, and I felt him... here. He came to say goodbye. I think he likes you and I know he wants me to be happy."

She kissed him then, hard and needy and pushed her hands up under his tshirt to feel his sweat drenched skin. He groaned.

"God, I love your touch..."

She peeled the tshirt off his head, and dropped her own head so that she could kiss his chest, and down further until she was unbuckling his pants and he was fisting his hands in her hair.

"I want to make love to you John... here, on top of this mountain. Now."

Laughter rumbled out of John, and he pulled her back up so that he could kiss her again, then his own hands were busy removing her clothes as fast as he could, until she lay still and waiting on the grass at the top of that mountain. As he lowered himself over her, she reached up and touched his face, running her hand down his cheek and her thumb over his lower lip.

"Just so you know... Colonel John Sheppard."

"Know what... Miss Nicole Harmon?" The last came out slightly breathless as he entered her and began the rythym that felt somehow right out here on that mountain top, with the cool breeze drying the sweat on his back.

"I kinda think I'm falling in love with you... just thought I'd put that out there." Her eyes were bright as she looked up at him, and her own breathing had quickened in response.

"Already there, sweetheart. Already there..." And when he came, it was with the blinding realisation that this was the perfect fit. Always.


	42. Chapter 42 Straight to the point

CHAPTER 42 – STRAIGHT TO THE TOP

He had held her for a long while at the top of that mountain and when the sun had started to tilt it's way down toward the horizen, he had prodded her slightly into action. The air had begun to cool and their bodies, still minus clothing, would chill fast at the top of the mountain. They laughingly made their way down, content to hold hands as new lovers do, stopping occasionally to take photos. When they reached the jumpers, John made sure she was safely in her own and watched her lift off and aim the craft in the direction of Atlantis, before turning towards his own. There on the ground, he saw a lone flower that had fallen out of the posy she had taken up the mountain, in memory of Ben.

He picked up the flower, twirling it experimentally in his hands. Then, as if making a decision, he tossed the flower high into the air and watched it come spiralling down.

"Don't worry Ben. I'll take care of your girl. I kinda get the feeling that you've passed the reins to me now. She's a keeper, is our Nicole. Rest in peace, Ben."

And he swore he felt a small breeze waft past his cheek as though someone or something had given him his blessing, and he was able to smile and make his own way back to Atlantis.

Nicole was not waiting for him in the jumper bay as he assumed she would be, and heading straight to the control room, he saw her standing up at the window, appearing to be deep in discussion with someone. He took the control room stairs two at time, wondering who had put that serious look on her face.

General O'Neill was on video link, and when John walked in the General raised an eyebrow in John's direction.

"Ah, Sheppard. So glad you could join us. I've just been filling Nicole in on a little visit that is about to come your way. One, which I might add, just doesn't sit quite right."

Raising an eyebrow of his own, he looked back at the General after noting briefly that Sam had stood back a little with a serious look on her face.

"Ok, so I'm thinking that the news is not particularly good, considering the lack of eagerness I am seeing on the faces here. Who can we expect, and when? Sir." This last was added somewhat in haste. John had a habit of simply forgetting that superior officers were to be addressed accordingly. In Atlantis, a more casual air seemed to have been adopted most of the time and John had to remember that when back on earth, General's in particular, deserved to be addressed with more respect.

"Oh... we're talking about two IOA officials, accompanying a certain important person. I'll give you a hint, Sheppard... four star general ring any bells?"

"Ding, ding...they're ringing, but for whom General?" John's response was dry.

"Funny, Sheppard. Actually? That was funny. No, really... can't guess?"

"General O'Neill... sir. I could take a few guesses, and I'm thinking that perhaps you like to play this sort of game? But me sir, with all due respect, not so much. So, no – I prefer not to guess."

The General huffed a breath and Sam tried unsuccessfully to smother a grin. They weren't so different, these two men. Both slightly irreverent, with inherently dry humour and each one more than a match for the other.

"Ok, spoilsport. Does the Director of the NSA ring any bells? Hmmm?"

"Ding, ding, General. And that's an affirmative. Why are they coming here? Do we know?"

"We, Colonel Sheppard, know why they're coming. You, on the other hand? Are about to find out. Apparantly the director wants to visit the mining planet of P67T23 – currently producing high levels of trelium, which as you know is proving to be a high grade weapons mineral. Weapons... Colonel. Does that set any alarm bells ringing?"

"Ding, ding, General. Once again we have a winner. So... your spidey senses telling you that perhaps, we might have some more players on the board, coming to pay us a little visit?"

Nicole had been following the conversation closely, and she interupted now. "Not just players General... this one? He's the top of the chain. It fits."

General O'Neill sat up straighter in his chair, a few hundred light years away on earth. Jest had been replaced by a calm seriousness. "You're sure, Nicole?"

"I'd take it to the bank, General. This guy, NSA? He's the one. The top. Access to everything he needs. Highest ranking security agent in the USA, commander of Cyber Command and chief of Central Security Service – what is the mandate for this agency? To prescribe security regulations covering operating practices, including the transmission, handling, and distribution of signals intelligence and communications security material within and among the elements under control of the Director of the National Security Agency, and exercise the necessary supervisory control to ensure compliance with the regulations. Now General... tell me? Does THAT ring a bell?"

"Ding, ding..." he replied a little dryly. "Damn it, Nicole... how do you do that? Make those connections that fast? I can't follow the speed your brain works."

Nicole chuckled. "Don't worry General... there's not many who can keep up with me when I'm on a roll."

Sam cut in. "Jack, what do we do?"

"Your call Sam. I'd suggest standing back and letting the visit happen exactly as planned. There's still around 10 days left before the deadline runs out. We don't want to tip the scales before then. I'm thinking we'll have all the players and a complete pyramid in a matter of days, and the mines are being laid in place as we speak. We can't pull the plug too soon, or they won't all go down. If you think you can pull it off, have them visit and not tip them off? Do it, and that'll keep everything moving on schedule."

Sam nodded and she heard John huff a breath.

"So we take them to P67T23 and let them see the mining operations. We know they're looking at some sort of weapons deal that is about to go down in 10-14 days. Does the supply of weapons grade mineral have anything to do with this deal? What about the na'aquita in the milky way galaxy? That's a little closer to home, and we know the supply of that is regular and already being channelled to earth for ships like the Prometheus. Why do they need to look into the Trelium?"

"Na'aquita mining has become a little more difficult of late. We are restricted in what we can take back to earth and if we continue the way we are going, then that supply will be cut off. They have been testing the properties of Trelium at Area 51, and it appears that it possesses a stronger weapons grade than that of Na'aquita."

John's reply was derisive. "So for all their self important and supercilious words, they will do no differently than those in power now. Exactly what most of the superpowers have done with earth's resources... pretty much stripped them bare. And that appears to be a bone of contention for this rogue group that has been formed. They want to shut down the space programmes, but they want the minerals found in space? Not sure I follow their rationale – or am I missing something?"

"They want to strip the resources out here bare, then shut it down. Permanently. Nothing goes in and nothing goes out. What sort of society would you compare this to Sheppard? Given what you know of this group to date?"

It was Nicole who answered. Her keen mind already filling in the blanks.

"Imperialistic society, General Succinctly put... It is the state policy, practice, or advocacy of extending power and dominion, especially by direct territorial acquisition or by gaining political and economic control of other areas. Because it always involves the use of power, whether military force or some subtler form, imperialism has often been considered morally reprehensible, and something we have always been firmly opposed to in the good old US of A. Rather a shock to find that the man at the top of the pyramid would support such a social and political structure."

"That's certainly not a world we want to live in. So let them come, boys and girls. Show them your galaxy or at least your little corner of it. Make them see what it is they are attempting to shut down. Then? We shut them down."

"Ding, ding..." muttered John, earning a sharp glance from the General.

There was definitely one person in that control room who would surely suffer under the dictatorial ruling of an imperialistic government.


	43. Chapter 43 Field Trip

CHAPTER 43 – FIELD TRIP

It appeared that the scheduled mission to the planet where wraith were beginning to show themselves a little more frequently that was deemed polite, would have to be put on hold. They had a show and tell to sit through first. And one that would require an extremely high level of acting skills. They would have to welcome the visiting group to Atlantis, unable to give them any sign that they knew of the suspected affiliation with the group who were currently blackmailing Nicole into exposing the stargate programme.

"And you're sure you didn't meet General Summers at that dinner? The two IOA men coming with him? What about them?"

John was insistent. He was in the control room with Nicole and wanted her out of the way when they arrived. He had thought it would seem suspicious if she were standing by his side in the gate room when they came through. They would also have to tread very carefully where their relationship was concerned. As far as Nicole knew, the group had no inkling of her relationship with the Colonel, and they wanted it to stay like that. They had proposed to stay only one night in Atlantis, and she would move back into her old quarters for that night. Just in case.

"I can't be 100 percent sure John. As you may recall, I was a little under the weather for most of the dinner... and there were several faces there who remained in the background and did not speak... at least not while I was in any state to register it. I'm sorry... I know it must be frustrating, but I'm doing my best here!"

He ran a hand down her hair to calm her. "Hey... I'm not putting it back on you... I'm just concerned that this whole thing will blow up in our faces before we get the final touches in place. You're amazing, sweetheart. You've put all the pieces together, mostly on your own. We're the ones that need to step up now, and do our part. You've more than done yours."

He felt her relax a little and knew that her tension came from frustration. She wanted it all over, they all did. Her story was more or less complete, she would however add to it once the Director and and IOA returned to earth. And of course, the crowning glory would be when the house of cards came crashing down. That would be the finale to her story. If it ever got published – John thought that perhaps one day, and maybe in the not so distant future, Nicole would find a way to convince those in power, that running her story would be a good thing for the world. Not a bad thing. Living in the light. That's what being around Nicole meant. And she intended to bring that same gift to the rest of the world.

When the claxons sounded signifying the stargate activation, Nicole gave John a hasty kiss and left the room quickly. She would go back to her quarters and start editing her photos. They'd call her when it was time to leave.

She didn't have too long to wait. John and Sam along with Rodney, had given their visitors the 'usual' hands on tour of Atlantis. The Trelium mining planet was accessible by stargate, so when she got the call to join them, it was to the gateroom that she went, but not before stopping by the gear room first for a tactical vest. Ronon was there with her, picking up his weapon. He would be going along on the mission as well, and he raised an eyebrow at her when she walked in.

"All set?"

"Nearly... I want to take a weapon, Ronon."

His eyebrow quirked up again, and he shook his head.

"So you can shoot your foot off? Until Sheppard knows you can handle a weapon, I would suggest leaving it. That's my advice."

"Well, it's not an order, so..." she moved over to the array of weaponry and paused at the semi automatic.

"This'll do nicely. Don't look at me like that Ronon! I've used one before... hell, I even shot something once..."

"Yeah? What?"

"Coke can..." she mumbled this as she struggled a little to fit the small weapon into a secure area, and Ronon, muttering an oath, pushed her hand aside and held out a thigh holster, kneeling down and strapping it to her leg. He gingerly inserted the weapon and gave it a pat.

"There... now I feel better."

"Not so sure the rest of us do..." His tone was dry and the look he gave her was a little dark, but she smiled at him and quirked an eyebrow and he chuckled. Sheppard had his hands full with this one.

Nicole and Ronon were the last ones to arrive in the gate room, and she watched as John gave her a polite smile, then watched as his eyes widened when they took in the weapon she had strapped to her leg. The look in his eyes was not pleasant, and she winced a little, knowing that the crap would hit the fan, but mentally shrugging her shoulders. There was no way she was going offworld with the head of what was a global conspiracy, without some sort of backup off her own.

General Summers, the director of the NSA, stepped forward with his hand out. His eyes were cold and they showed no recognition at all, but she did see a spark of... something... when he took in the weapon at her thigh.

"Miss Harmon. I've heard all about you from General O'Neill. Your little adventure in arriving here in Atlantis with no recollection of how you came to be here. I understand the General is trying to find out how you came to arrive here. It seems rather an unfortunate situation for you..."

"Yes, General – it is. But I'm trying to keep busy – taking photos and staying out of everyone's way until they can get me clearance to go home." She had shaken the General's hand and heard the snort of derision that John could barely suppress at her comment. No, she had most assuredly not stayed out of people's way.

"Yes, that is admirable. I understand you're coming along on this trip today? To photograph?"

"Colonel Carter asked if I would take some photos for the scientists at Area 51. They are working on the Trelium properties, and need to have visual on some of the topographic conditions from which the mineral is derived. I'm glad to be given something to do. It has been a little tedious sitting around Atlantis with nothing to do. Although I have to commend the people here – they have made my stay as pleasant as possible."

She gave the General a bland smile that had John almost choking. It seemed her acting skills were on par with her writing abilities and he shook his head. It was going to be an interesting trip.

The Trelium deposits were located near the surface of the hard rock found on the planet and the methods of mining used by the inhabitants of Paledia, as the planet was named, was a version of open-cut mining, otherwise known as surface mining – being the most effective because the mineral deposit was close to the surface. The technique involved blasting and removing surface layers of soil and rock to reach the deposit. A separation process was then used to eliminate waste by-products. The particular separation method used by the people of Paledia involved the use of heavy liquids. When the Trelium seam became exposed it was then drilled, fractured and mined, this particular method was effective in recovering 90% of the mineral deposit.

Trelium was used as a trading commodity with other parts of the galaxy and as this was their only commodity, most of the male and female population of the planet were involved in the mining production. It was self replenishing, although the process took time – many years. The Trelium deposits beneath the surface of the planet were extensive, and so far they had managed the conservation issue on the planet satisfactorily. Only one part of the planet was mined at any one time, while a previously mined area was given at least ten years to regenerate. Quantities so far had been sufficient for their own use and trading.

John doubted that they would be able to provide the quantities that earth would require. Not without some serious conservation damage to the planet. It seemed that the group that General Summer represented did not care very much about that.

John had let Sam go on ahead with the visitors for a few moments, and when they had a small measure of privacy, John had gripped Nicole's upper arm. Tight.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? Give me that damn gun, before you shoot someone with it."

He reached down to her thigh, intent on extracting the weapon, but she stepped briskly away from him and pulled herself out of his grip.

"Careful John... you'll blow our little plan out of the water. As I told Ronon, I've fired one of these before... and everyone else on your missions always has a gun – even Rodney!"

"They damn well know how to use them – I've personally trained them all myself. You? I'm not taking your word for it Nicole. Give me the damn weapon."

"No! And stop being so damn bossy. You're going to attract attention soon, and that, Colonel Sheppard, would not be a good thing. So go back to your guests and play nice. I can take care of myself."

Resisting the urge to reach up and kiss that damn frown off his face, she winked at him and danced on ahead , calling out for the others to wait for her. Ronon turned and tried to hide the smirk when he saw the look in John's eyes.

He was thinking that he might just take the gun and shoot her himself. That would go a long way to putting them all out of their misery.


	44. Chapter 44 Suffer his pride

CHAPTER 44 – SUFFER HIS PRIDE

While his fingers itched to simply reach out and take that gun off her, he did his job. Moved back up to where the General waited for him to catch up, and plastered a smooth smile on his face. Play nice with the guests. Hmmm. He'd be sure to play nice with her later. To within an inch of her life.

The foreman of the mine met them at the extraction area. Mining our here in the Pegasus galaxy, was simplistic compared to the giant mining corporations and comglomerates found on earth. Likely, the reason why the people of this planet had been able to mine this particular mineral for hundreds of years without decimating the planet. Lack of greed. Pure and simple. They produced what they needed for their own use and trade, and no more.

Earth would do well to take a little field trip out here and look at how far they have come over the years. How far forward, and how far back. It was a fine line, in John's opinion.

John let the voices drift over him. He was not interested in what earth wanted to do out here. It was not going to happen. Not on his watch. Yes, they had taken the mineral back to earth for testing at Area 51 – and yes. It would be used in some of NASA's space applications for ships – but in the long run? Their needs would be small and it would done through correct trade channels. What this group was proposing was taking the mineral in massive quantities for weapons use. John would not allow that to happen, but he had to go along with the charade for now.

He saw the puzzled look that the foreman had sent John's way. A game was being played out here, and unfortunately the Lantien's had not been able to forewarn the people of Paledia. He watched as the foreman had shaken his head at the General, and seen the angry set of his shoulders. It appeared that this meeting was not going well.

His turn to step up. He looked across at Nicole and she was busy taking photos. Not so much of the mining process itself, but of the people, the ones working the mine. Distracted a little now, he watched her moving with easy grace amongst the people. Long dark swinging at her waist, stopping to talk first with one person, then another – and saw the easy comraderie that sprung up immediately. He watched as she gently touched the shoulder of a man who wore his arm in a sling of sorts, saw the sympathy in her eyes as well as the admiration. He would still work, even with his injury. Loyalty. Something she respected.

Again and again her camera clicked and then finally she swung it around and her attention was focused on the group of visitors. General Summers, Director of NSA and two IOA officials, both of whom John had assumed were members of the group. Sam had unobtrusively added them to the third line of the pyramid. At Nicole's suggestion.

Then his eyes were drawn back to the weapon at her thigh and he groaned and hoped that she'd not have the opportunity to use it.

He watched as she sauntered over to the group of visitors, camera dangling a little negligently from her hand. Her body movements caught his eye, almost too casual – and he narrowed his eyes slightly. She was up to something, and not able to fully trust her, he got his own feet moving quickly, attempting to intervene before she inserted more than just her foot into her mouth.

The General watched her with frank curiousity, following her movements as she photographed and his eyes remained on her as she moved toward him now, all feline grace and sexuality. John saw the spark in the General's eye and wanted to plant a fist squarely in his face – General or not.

"Miss Harmon. I look forward to seeing your photographs on display – one day." His voice held no inflection whatsoever and when she looked into his face, she found his eyes were cold, flickering only with one small emotion. Frank interest in her.

"I doubt these photos will ever be displayed, General. It seems the world is not ready for any hard truths, just yet. Not these sort of truths, anyway."

"Oh, I think you might find that exceptions will be made... they always are, my dear."

Her gaze sharpened as she looked at him. "Exceptions are often made when one wields more power than one has a right to... General."

Her voice was soft, and Sam, who had been standing beside the General, started slightly at the turn the conversation was beginning to take. She slanted her eyes to John, who was rapidly closing the distance, attempting to get him to intervene. Nicole was sparking, Sam could see that. And short of physically gagging the woman, Sam was trying quickly to think of something to diffuse the escalating tension.

"Power, Nicole? I think everyone craves power of some sort... if the right incentives are there. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about."

Again, those veiled messages and Nicole felt her temper crackle and burn, along with John's hand clamping rather uncomfortably on her wrist. She saw the General's hand flicker a little uncertainly to that hand and Nicole threw caution and common sense to the wind.

"Those incentives you talk about General – would they include blackmail?"

She heard Sam's sharp intake of breath and heard John groan. In a flash, the General had surged forward and had her in a headlock, pulled back hard against his body, her own weapon removed from it's holder and pushed into her side. Her wrist had been ripped from John's hand and he had little time to react. Pulling his own weapon, he brought it up, centering it on the General, while flicking glances from Nicole to the General.

The others had reacted a little slower. Ronon and Teyla pulled their own weapons, keeping these centred of the two IOA officials, who had not had time to react. Sam backed away, giving Ronon and Teyla a clear line of vision and motioned for the mining people to move away and give her people some room. They did not look inclined to put up any form of argument.

"Let her go, General. There's nowhere for you to run out here. No where to go. This isn't earth – you have no allies out here."

John kept his weapon up, his finger tightening a little on the trigger.

"Give us passage back to earth. I'll take her with me, and she'll be free once I arrive. I have to continue with the plan – it's imperative. All things will come to pass in less than a week. Nothing can stop what we have put in place now. If you kill me? I am but one person. There will be others who will step and continue what I have started."

"We know more than you think we do – we know the players and we have a little plan of our own to surprise you with. So no, General. Going back to earth is not an option right now. And when you do? You'll see the inside of a jail cell – for a very long time."

He saw something close to fear bloom in that madman's eyes. He conveyed a message to Sam and she nodded once. She would go back to the stargate and get Atlantis to send an urgent message to General O'Neill. Time to light the fuse under the players. It was time to bring the house of cards down. Because time had suddenly run out.


	45. Chapter 45 Tumbling down

CHAPTER 45 – TUMBLING DOWN

"You're wasting your time, Colonel. I am only one. Take me down? There are others..."

John's weapon was still fixed unwaveringly on the General. He saw fear in Nicole's eyes and could find no way to convey to her what he felt right now. He kept his emotions tightly leashed, the soldier with a weapon in his hand, about to take down the top player in the game of thrones.

The next move appeared as if in slow motion, one that John failed to anticipate. The General pushed the gun harder into Nicole's side and John barely had time to hear her cry of pain before the weapon discharged. Two things happened simultaneously. Nicole slipped from his grip and the General brought the weapon up to his temple and fired.

"Nicole! No!" The chasm between himself and Nicole seemed impossibly wide and events moved in slow motion. He dropped his own gun and felt his legs cross that chasm and standing outside himself briefly, saw himself drop down onto the ground beside her body, saw his mouth open wide and he screamed for Ronon and Teyla to secure the IOA men. Watched as his hands fumbled for her tactical vest, ripping it off and tearing at her shirt to get to the wound. Saw Rodney race for the General, and kick the weapon away from his outstretched hand and look down at the unseeing eyes.

Then he came back to himself with a roar of sound, and it was his own voice he heard, calling her name as he reached for and found, a pressure bandage and applied it. Without thought. Without any idea of what he was doing.

Reacting on instinct.

He looked up wildly, and saw Ronon and Teyla had secured the two IOA men, and Teyla had dropped down onto the ground beside him, and had gently pushed his hands aside so that she could look at the wound. Rodney had turned and was running. Heading back to the stargate to contact Atlantis and get urgent medical attention.

"Nic...Nic... oh god..." John pulled his hands away, leaving Teyla to apply the pressure and looked at the blood on his hands. Looking down into her pale face, he blanched. The wound was bad. It had hit at her waist and the amount of blood that was coming out of her had his mind shutting down. If she went, he would simply go with her.

"John. Colonel Sheppard!" Teyla spoke sharply and he dragged his attention back to her.

"You need to pull yourself together. Stay strong. This isn't finished yet. Nicole needs you to be strong and we need you to finish this. Do you understand me John?"

Her words got through. Somehow. Looking again at the blood on hands, he wiped them on his pants leg and bent to place his hands under her, lifting her gently while Teyla walked along side, keeping pressure on the wound.

They didn't speak and Teyla doubted she would get through to him for now. She kept pace with him, flicking her gaze between him and Nicole and she wondered of the two, which was the more pale. John looked almost deathly. He put one foot in front of the other, hands gripping her tightly and he wouldn't look down at her as he walked. Refused to see the pale features and the blood that seeped from the wound at her side.

They were nearly at the gate when it activated and Carson came running through with a medical bag and an assistant. He took one look at the woman in his arms and John paused, looking blankly at the doctor as he reached for the pressure bandage and lifted it, schooling his features to careful blankness as he covered it back up again, risking an assessing glance at the Colonel. He saw a lack of comprehension there, a numbness and Carson let it go for now, knowing that he would have to find his own way back to the here and now. Carson needed to focus on Nicole.

Rodney had redialled the gate and as soon as the wormhole stabilised, Carson and John were the first ones through, followed by the remainder of John's team bringing the IOA prisoners with them. Two marines had been dispatched to retrieve the General's body and bring it back to Atlantis. It would be sent back to earth for General O'Neill to deal with.

"Get her into the infirmary, lad – stat. The wound is severe, but we can stop her bleeding out further. Nurse? Go on ahead and set up the IV and surgical area. We need to operate and get that bullet out. Colonel? Carefully does it, lad. She's lost a lot of blood and we want to keep what's left in there, secure..."

Carson ran on ahead, shouting instructions at John over his shoulder, and John continued to function on autopilot. He knew that his arms and shoulders would ache when he finally put her down and knew that he would welcome the pain when it came. It would give him something to hang on to while Nicole fought for her life.

He surrendered his burden reluctantly to the bed that the nurse had set up and stood back, blood soaking his shirt and hands, and was transferred to his face after he had rubbed a hand down his cheeks, not sure what to do with himself now. Ronon, who had followed them in, put a hand down firmly on his shoulders. Few words, but one action and John closed his eyes briefly, then turned to face Ronon, noting that Sam and Teyla had also entered the infirmary behind him.

"Sam..." His voice cracked and his knees buckled slightly. Ronon gripped him tightly, giving him a moment to get his strength back and when he did, his face hardened and he pulled himself upright and looked at the base commander.

"Sam..." His voice was stronger this time and Sam saw the soldier was back. He had left the man behind for now, unable to deal with his feelings and needing action. "Did General O'Neill light those damn fuses. Tell me this wasn't for nothing. Tell me the damn plan worked."

"The house is tumbling down as we speak John – she may have rushed things a little with her usual... enthusiasm... but it pushed the right buttons, and yes John. I think we will have a confirmed pile of rubble soon... "

Sam had just come from the control room where she had conferred briefly with Jack. The General had been ready and it was simply a matter of giving that final order. The pyramid had been more or less complete at least as far as they were concerned, and Jack now waited for confirmation that each member of the group was being rounded up and all documentation and files confiscated. It would be bigger than Watergate and would encompass a wider spread global conspiracy than any other uncovered to date. Jack's head was still spinning at the implications and he knew that once he had time to sit down and go through all the files, it would be mindblowing. He had meetings scheduled the following day to go through everything – given the sensitive nature of the documents, it was classified high level security and he wanted Sam and John there to help confirm identities and events. He would have liked Nicole there as well, but given the circumstances, knew that this would not be happening.

"You need to go and get cleaned up John. The surgery will take a while. Carson's got that look on his face... the one that usually means it'll be ok. Trust him. He'll patch her up good as new." Sam was sympathetic, and cast a worried look of her own in the direction of the surgery. She had deliberately lightened it for John, but had seen the serious look on Carson's face. The wound had been bad, she had seen enough gunshot wounds to know that. She knew that John did too.

He turned now, a little unsure what to do, and it was Ronon who laid a hand on his shoulder and led him away, throwing a look over his shoulder at Sam.

John had given him his unconditional friendship not that long ago and Ronon would take the opportunity to return it. He'd be there for him whatever the outcome and make sure he came through the ordeal the same way he went in. In one piece and with his humanity intact.


	46. Chapter 46 A life on the line

CHAPTER 46 – A LIFE ON THE LINE

Minutes passed or was it hours? John no longer knew. Time ceased to matter. His mind was not able to focus on anything other than the fact that Nicole was presently undergoing surgery for a gunshot wound, and healthy or not? The point of it was... she might not survive.

He had just found her. If he lost her now? He would simply... cease to exist himself.

_Fanciful, much... Sheppard. But you know... you sense it. Soul mates.. for life now. There can be no other. How can there be, when she consumes you from the moment the sun comes up until the moment it goes down? And in between... there is the memories of times spent together. Fight...Nic. For me, for us... I need you to fight._

He paced through the hallways, the litany going through his head. To find someone and then have to let them go. Life was cruel, and he willed her to be strong so that what they had, their connection... would have a chance to strengthen and become a permanent bond.

He had nearly reached the end of his endurance when he got the call. Carson. And his legs obeyed an order he had no recollection giving. They ran to the infirmary and somehow got him in the door with no recollection of having gotten there.

Carson was there... of course he was. Where else would he be when the woman he loved hovered on the brink of death. Carson would no more leave her than he would.

"Colonel.. John. Sit down lad. Before you fall down. You're standing on the edge, lad and it's a damn long way down. We've still got a long way to go... but she came through the surgery... she's alive. That's all we can ask for right now. Go and be with her. She'll know you're there, in that tucked away space that she keeps her emotions and her thoughts. Not much else is working for her right now, but that special place? She'll know you're there."

Carson had tears in his eyes as he looked at the devastated Colonel. He saw the pain.. hell, he felt the pain. It came off him in waves and Carson wished that he could sweep it all up into a pile and simply toss it away in the garbage.

Oh, that life could be that simple.

And so he sat. Beside her bed in the recovery area and watched as the machines monitored her life signs. Stared at her pale skin and the tubes that snaked in a foreboding pattern around her. And felt Ronon's hand on his shoulder when it all became too much.

And at some point he had an idea, and leaving the infirmary he went on the prowl, needing to find two items. Frantic, he asked Teyla to help him and understanding immediately, she sent him back to the infirmary and told him she would bring them to him there. And so he returned, and not long after Teyla walked in with a small smile on her face and two items in her hands, which she carefully transferred to John's hands. He took them, resting them gently on the bed, then tired beyond anything he had experienced before, he put his head down on the bed near her hand and closed his eyes.

It was as though the light suddenly came on. She opened those chocolate brown eyes and looked at him, reaching out a hand to rest gently on his head. His head came up immediately, almost disbelieving and saw that she looked right at him - really looked at him – and that tough Colonel who had fought a thousand wars and seen a thousand deaths... put his head down onto her hands and cried.

"S'ok John... gonna be ok..." Her words were slurred and sleepy and he felt her hand curl into his hair, the only movement she would force herself to do at the moment. Her body felt violated and almost broken. But feeling his tears against her hand. They began the healing process and she smiled. It was gonna be ok.

Then she saw them. Beside his head on the bed – a small bunch of flowers and a cardboard heart and her breath hitched as his head came up and followed her eyes. He had brought her hearts and flowers, and she knew that if she lived a thousand lifetimes, this simple action would never be erased from her memory.

Carson had come running in, relief lighting those kind eyes and he immediately started fussing around with the monitors and checking her vital signs.

"Aaahh lass... you gave us all one hell of a scare."

"No picnic at my end... Carson. But... thank you...for patching me up... gonna beat John's record..."

Carson chuckled and John finally raised his head to look into those chocolate eyes that were now regarding him steadily and with love.

"Hey you...go get some sleep. It's all good...you can yell at me later..."

And at last a brilliant smile lit his face.

It was 'all good' and he now had a lifetime to yell at her. And likely he would, but then they'd simply have the fun of making up. It would be a life of excitement... out here. Nicole inspired those around her to reach for something that was just out of their grasp and that old worn adage... to reach for the stars... came to mind.

He had already reached for them and his life was now amongst them. Now? Now he had a partner who had also spent a life searching – for that perfect photo, that perfect moment.

And as he stood up to leave, watching as those chocolate eyes shut and sleep claimed her once more, he knew he'd found his perfect moment.

Seeing the smile on her face... he hoped also, that she had finally found hers.


	47. Chapter 47 Closure

CHAPTER 47 – CLOSURE

General O'Neill stepped through the gate in Atlantis after the warning claxons had sounded throughout the city. A smiling Sam welcomed him and she noted the large briefcase he carried in his hands. Closure. For them all. He was here to detail the final moments of battle, for which a woman had nearly lost her life, but had brought a whole house of cards tumbling down.

"Jack...why is it your visits here are always at the start or end of some enormously life changing event that has happened either here or on earth...one day, perhaps you can just step through that gate... because..."

"Because...?" His smile quirked and those warm eyes regarded Sam, itching to drag her into his arms, but knowing they'd have to wait until later... alone.

"Yeah...just because..."

"Oh that my life could be that simple Sam. I don't remember the last time, something was just... because... Perhaps we should amend that while I'm here."

"I could work that into the agenda, Jack. You look happy – I take it everything went to plan?"

"It did, Sam. I would have liked you and Sheppard at that meeting yesterday, but I understand your reasons for not attending. Especially, Sheppard's. How's the young lass doing?"

"She's a fighter... and she's got another fighter on her side. Not to mention the whole damn base. They've all taken her under their wing. She brought something here with her Jack – whether she was here by accident or design... that doesn't matter. She brought something here, that we'll value forever. Integrity, grit, determination and a whole new way of looking at life. Through a lens..."

Jack moved in closer to her and risked a quick but hard kiss on her lips, feeling hers curve in response. "There... just needed to get that out of the way... until later. Can I go visit with the rather indomitible Miss Harmon?"

"I'm sure you can – unless her extremely overprotective Colonel is exerting some new found right he seems to think he has – of controlling who gets in to see her. Power seems to have gone to his head..."

And Jack laughed as he followed Sam down the hallway toward the infirmary. He knew exactly how the Colonel felt.

They heard the sounds of arguing coming through the open door of the infirmary, and Sam fought to smother a laugh. It seemed that Nicole was feeling...a lot better. She was not taking John's constant orders and nagging well, and Sam suspected that he was going to have a battle on his hands to keep her in that bed for much longer. Carson had almost given up, and left the Colonel to it, but Sam could see clearly by the exasperated set of his shoulders, that the good doctor most certainly disapproved.

"Aah... Miss Harmon." The General's voice had both John and Nicole clamping their argument down immediately, and two pair of eyes shot his way. One set hazel, and very frustrated. One set chocolate brown, and spitting sparks.

Jack couldn't resist the chuckle. "I wanted to make an appearance and personally thank you for everything you did. For your country, for Atlantis, for the world...hell...for our damn galaxy. If their little plan had continued on it's destructive path, the earth as we know it would cease to exist. And believe me, they had enough people in place to make sure that it would have happened, if you hadn't of brought them tumbling down."

"Wasn't just me, General...I took a few photos...connected a few dots. The rest? It was everyone doing their part – you – back on earth digging up everything you could, and putting into place the fuses to bring them down. How did that go...is the bonfire still burning as we speak?"

She had pushed herself out of the bed and now sat at the edge, swinging her legs, but grimacing a little as she put a hand tentatively at her side, fingering the bandage there.

"Aaah... shouldn't you be lying down...or something?" The General looked a little concerned. She was pale and he could see that her hands were clenched. A stubborn one, no doubt about it.

"Damn foolish woman..." John muttered this somewhat ominously and pushing himself off the chair he had been sitting in, he moved so that he was standing over her, hazel eyes locked onto chocolate ones. And Jack had to smother a smile as the woman unclenched one hand and looped it around the Colonel's neck and brought his head down so that she could kiss him. Jack watched as all tension went out of the Colonel's back and he pressed his forehead against hers, oblivous to the audience of two, one of whom cleared her throat a little menacingly.

"If you two can give us a moment of your time... the General has come a long way."

Unrepentant, Nicole's face peered around John's shoulder, and he turned, pressing himself against her good side, unwittingly giving her body the support of his. If she was going to insist on sitting up, he'd be there to make sure she didn't fall down.

"You gonna give us all the dirt, General?"

Shaking his head a little at her obvious irreverence, Jack hefted the briefcase he held. "Up for a little light reading?"

"Bring it on... might stop grumpy here picking on me – he's getting pissy because I keep beating him at chess."

Jack chuckled and opened his briefcase, pulling out sheafs of paper and handing it to Nicole. John watched as something drooped in her eyes and knew that she was tiring, but trying to tell her that would serve absolutely no purpose. Attempting subtlty, he eased himself up on the bed, and unconsciously she mirrored his movements, settling back against the pillows again, now leaning comfortably against his long frame that took up a good portion of the bed. Jack pushed down the smile. Sam had called them lego blocks and he saw the analogy now. Yeah, they fit. Perfect pieces that could be built into anything they wanted, meshing together in one seamless design.

He envied the younger man, stealing a look now at the woman beside him who had wound her way into his heart more than 10 years ago. And wished that the end game had been a little different.

"The top sheets summarise what we learnt at the meetings yesterday. We brought down almost 1000 players across the global game board. 1000. You had it pegged perfectly for those top lines of your pyramid, but we found hidden lines in there, bottom lines of that pyramid, mostly made up of security detail from different participating countries around the world. The rest? People like yourself who had been forced into compliance."

"The enforcers..." murmured Nicole. "The ones who would ensure that no one went against the mandate. And if the enforcers failed, then there would have been more than sufficient blackmail tactics in place to ensure that all the players did exactly as they were meant to do. Just out of curiousity – were the majority of the players there because of their own values, their own beliefs? Or because of exerted pressure?"

"The interviews will take place over many months, Nicole. With this amount of people? And these were only the ones that fitted in the pyramid. Beneath the pyramid? There were tunnels, and these tunnels were filled with the vermin who live in the dark and scury like rats leaving a sinking ship. Those? We may never find those... but they lack any strength to carry anything out on their own, so we'll let them scurry away and lick their wounds. Without anyone to guide them, they're no threat."

Nicole was flicking through the pages and shuddered a little as she recognised some of the names. The one's she hadn't been able to place on the pyramid.

There was a knock at the door and looking up with a smile, Nicole saw Robert come in, a cautious look on his face.

"General... Colonel's... Nicole...I just wanted to stop by and make sure all the ends had been tied up. I understand you've commenced the interviews?" He stood beside the bed near Nicole and looked over her shoulder at the paperwork she held, raising his eyebrow in query at the General.

"It may not seem a lot of names for a global domination, but considering their strategic placement in the majority of countries that are likely to have any say in such a conspiracy, and the fact that below them they will have a loyal faction of followers whose names will never appear on any list... we cannot allow anything like this to happen again."

Jack looked from Nicole to Robert, knowing they wanted answers, having been the unwilling pawns in this game. Robert was going to head back to earth with him and would be seconded to the SGC for the duration of the interviews. His role in Atlantis had been a computer technician and he would provide invaluable assistance to the General, which would go a long way to easing some of the guilt he carried over past misdemeanours.

"You don't feel just a tiny bit proud that you were selected out of thousands, to be the one to provide front person PR to this group? On this list, there are other reporters and news people, sure... but you? You were the one they chose to present their face to the world. When the time was right."

"Proud? No, General, I feel disgusted and dirty... and a little bit ashamed. That my work on earth was turned into something distasteful. It leaves a bad taste... I don't know that I can take up where I left off...I'll also look back at my photos and wonder, who else is looking at them. That cuts me off at the knees..."

John's hand had rested against her leg and he now pulled her head down so that it rested against his shoulder, feeling the tension begin to spiral in her body.

"That's another reason I'm here Nicole. See this?" In his palm he held her flashdrive. "This is yours. To do what you want with it. The government, the stargate programme? They're not going to confiscate it. They want you to continue... to stay out here and tell the whole story. And one day, when they think the world is ready – they want you to take the story to the world... that will be your legacy..."

He paused, and John flicked a glance down at the woman beside him. She had a smile on her face, but her eyes were closed.

In her hand she clutched a single photo that had fallen out of the file in her hand. A photo that showed Colonel John Sheppard, looking pensively at the large full moon coming up over the mainland, with the festivities of the Athosian festival a blur in the background – the foreground image more than just a little startling in it's simplicity. And a second moon, just to the side of the first – the only indication that this photo was not taken on earth.

And John smiled as he realised that this oh so important photographer who could brought the world to it's knees with a single photograph, had also brought him to his knees. He closed his own eyes, and didn't notice the General and Sam quietly leave the infirmary with Robert chuckling quietly behind them. Life out here in the Pegasus Galaxy, fighting for the survival of mankind, speeding through space on a whim, and clutching a single photograph that told more than a thousand words.

Yeah, life didn't get any better than that.

_**The end...**_

_**Another journey complete, and once again, true love inspires us to simply do more than just exist.**_

_**I'm a girl... so that's the way it goes. **_

_**Till the next adventure... and the next romantic interest for our favourite Colonel. Just a heads up... it's in progress. **_

_**Look out for Renegade Soldier...**_

_**You will note that I deliberately left something hanging... Teyla and Ronon and that little trinket she had found... Perhaps a sequel will eventuate, if the whim takes me...**_

_**Thank you for supporting my stories. You guys are the true heroes as you willingly shed the bonds of reality and take a step into my fantasies.**_


End file.
